I don't know if this is just a vent or if I need some advice . I've had some pretty life-altering events in the past three years and I believe it's all starting to catch up with me. I find myself withdrawing from everything (my family and NT included). . I've always been a very tough individual but lately I just don't seem to care about anything. It's taken me a couple of weeks just to post about this . I'm already on an AD and I'm not willing to change meds because I've been extremely sensitive to other AD's in the past. I'm just wondering if I need to give myself more time to adjust to my 'new and unimproved' life? Here's some background for those of you who don't know already: Moved to Florida less than three years ago away from all extended family and friends, got a well-paying job shortly after but had to go on LTD this year, dx with MS May of 07 (I went from working 60 hour weeks to now walking with a cane and having some major cog problems), my youngest son had to have traumatic Crohn's related surgery in 06, my mom died in April of this year from cancer (she was dx in Feb. and lived for only 71 days after), during that time my husband was dx with Crohn's disease and is still pretty ill, we are also in the midst of filing bankruptcy. That's all I can think of off the top of my head . So, what do ya think?? Thanks for reading if you got this far .

You do what I've been doing. You just move to the music until you really feel like dancing again. I heard that quote somewhere and I'm just paraphrasing it. The gist of it is that life has become like a party you didn't want to go to, but if you just give it a chance and just move to the music, pretty soon you will get into it and feel like dancing again.

It is an up and down thing. For me, it is like two steps forward and one back. I have days when I really think I'm making progress and feeling good about things and then have a set back.

Somewhere in a PM, I think I have your number. I may have to give you a call!!

Today is the only day you can count on for today. Focus on making each day as tolerable as possible. The past is gone, it can't be changed and an easier way to cope with it is to remind yourself that you're still alive for some reason.

Just be alive today, it's plenty.

Joelle, you know what I think? I think a long, trash talk, curse fest, smack down, day or night time call is in order? It's been too long hasn't it? What do you think?

Joelle my heart goes out to you. I love the saying Holly just mentioned. I don't really know what to say other than I am here for you. It will take time and I think everyone is different in healing time. I know you are currently dealing with things but just know that support is here for you! Try to take a little comfort in that.

I "fake it till I make it", which probably summarizes what both Holly and Cindy's have said.

Everyone goes through these times, Joellelee. We go through the hard times, to get to the good times . . . and you have to keep the faith that those good times will come.

When things are particularly hard for me, that's when I do some heavy soul-searching. Sometimes that means counselling, or just reading a series of inspirational books (about beating the odds). . . or both.

I try to find things that keep me humble or give me pleasure, if only for a short period every day.

I force myself to volunteer for things that I find very emotionally difficult, and I cry a lot.

I pray, but only seem to do that when I am VERY desperate. I like to reserve my favors.

I post inspirational messages on the mirror and fridge.

I count my blessings regularly, and pat myself on the back for the smallest of accomplishments. I think about how much worse things could be.

I try to remember that this is only a moment in time.

I keep the faith that things will get better.



Cherie

(if all else fails, I find a new drug . . . one that does what it should)

Aww, sweety.....I'm sorry you're feelin' so down. Life can seem like a collision course for sure sometimes. Like it waits till you're down and it gets in one more jab.

You're due for a break that's for certain. You know you're in my prayers....and you know you can call me anytime day or night. I'm always here....might be in the bathroom but I'll call right back!!

I wish I had an easy answer for you. I remember feeling the exact same way you do right now. I couldn't see a light at the end of the road. There was one, of course, but it was hard to get there.

Sorry for all your troubles, Joellelee.

As you can see, there are many folks here at NT who care about you. I'm glad you were able to post and hope you will receive strength, support and comfort.

I found your phone number and called, but got the machine. I left you a longish, rambling message -- the machine told me when I only had 30 seconds left, lOl!

Praying for you, friend. Be well.

Hey J~ I hope you know that I am speaking from my heart when I say that I know you've had so many trials to get through. Your family's health (your's included) along w/losing your dear Mother, have rocked your world.

I had a rough yr last year. You know that I also lost my dear Mother 3 1/2 wks after a CA dx. It literally pulled the rug out from under me. It's hard to lose a person you love so much. You have had so much to deal with and I hope that you know how much I care about you. (we all do here at NT)

Please know that I am praying for you and your family and sending hugs to you.

How unfair for any one person to have to deal with all of this!

Please consider at least speaking to your Doctor about tweaking your current AD if you aren't willing to try a different one. Wishing you well and sending hugs, Jules