Your comment that I bolded is rather confusing Cherie. You never had food? What did you live on?

We had food battles when I was growing up. My mom was never a good cook so that added to the problem. We were required to eat everything that was put in front of us. That's the way my dad was raised and he would eat anything whether he liked it or not.

He and I would sit at the dinner table until midnight some nights when mom would serve peas. I could not eat them. Could not get them in my mouth. My punishment would be grounding me for a week. That never lasted because I was the oldest and drove everyone to school or their activities because mom couldn't. Finally, dad pushed me too far one night and I threw up, that ended the battle. No more peas. Thank goodness. To this day, I pick peas out of everything...any kind of peas.

Brussel sprouts are great if they are cooked right. MIL cooks them for days (I think) and they are horrid. Can't eat hers. And I don't care for creamed corn and I hate rice. I will eat it in stuff, but not by itself. We used to have it for breakfast a alot cuz mom was not a cook. Cooked rice with milk and sugar was about the only thing she could make for breakfast. It was easier than oatmeal! Go figure!

Childhood memories form adult phobias of food...I am convinced of that. But I also have a lot of food allergies so there are some foods that I just cannot eat due to allergies...

I ate what was put in front of me - if I hadn't I wouldn't have been given anything different - and my husband was brought up the same way - we were never asked what we wanted -we were expected to eat what everyone else was having - my sons ate supper way before their father got home and one of their favorite remembrances is me saying 'just shovel' - always wondered why my shepherd would station himself under the table at dinnertime - I hated to cook then and I hate it now - sons are both excellent cooks so something good came out of it -

Mostly toast, and what I scavenged from other people's houses.

My mom was a full blown schizophrenic, and dad an alcholic who wasn't around much for the last several years (before he died when I was 11 yrs). Mom tried to support us, but on a secretary's wage (where she kept getting fired), it didn't go far.

You could look in our fridge and cupboards on any day (except payday) and find ONLY:

- milk
- tea bags
- bread
- butter
- sugar
- potatoes

... and maybe some wilted carrots or some other un-recognizable veggie. I never ate breakfast, I never took a lunch (at least from gr 3 on, for sure), and I usually ate 6 pieces of toast after school. Sometimes friends would have me over too . . .

My mom came home from work, and went straight to bed for the night. She never looked at one of my report cards, and I forged her signature for everything that came home. I'm not sure how we got away with it (maybe everyone in the community "knew" about us), but they stopped calling to say I skipped school by the 8th grade.

I moved out when I was 15 and supported myself by cleaning, cooking and doing laundry for a home of 12 people. I graduated too (and went on to get a diploma in Human Resources years later).

Kids are very resilient.

Cherie

Sorry, Cherie, I didn't mean to pry.

I do understand.

Wow, Cherie.....you overcame alot and have much to be proud of.

Absolutely! Bravo for you!

That's ok, Cheryl . . . my "stories" often require a bit TMI in order for others to understand.

Thanks Kelly and TT. I became very self-sufficient, and have done everything I've ever wanted in life. I don't have any regrets, even if things weren't always "perfect".

Cherie

My mom was never strict with us about food - not by the time I came along. She started off a little tougher - eat what's on your plate - but one of the older kids had a food allergy.

Mom figured if we were that set against eating something maybe there was a reason for it. She'd have us try a bite then let it go. After all there were six of us and somebody would eat it.

She didn't make us go to bed hungry either- if you didn't want dinner, there was peanut butter, you made yourself a sandwich.

Not so much that she spoiled us (although she did) but the doctor advised it as my brother and I were under weight. I barely hit 20lbs when I started school.

I follow the same rules with my kids and granddaughter; I have them try food but if they don't like it they are not made to eat it. Funny they usually get used to the taste after a few tries. The ds did turn out to be allergic to the same things as my brother though. And there is still peanut butter.

Oh Cherie,
Your story reminds me of many of the children I care for at the hospital and it gives me the hope that keeps me going back. I just know that some of them will overcome their horrid beginnings. You are living proof.
Hugs,
Jules

You won't get through to ALL of them, Jules, but what you are doing WILL make a difference for some. It's worth it, and they will remember your influence!!

Just don't sweat the small stuff over what they do/don't do . . . but I'm sure you know that.

Cherie