Dabbo,
I'm so sorry to hear about the job. I hope something comes along for you that's great- better pay, better benefits, better everything!

On another note, today I found out that my high school friend, who is dying of cancer, is back in the hosp. with pneumonia and is too weak to take his treatment. He has also broken out with some kind of blood blisters all over him....My neck is really hurting tonight but after I heard that I'm ashamed to even complain about it.

say "hello" to my dear extended family.

I am sorry for dabbo for the loss of your job. maybe the new one will be better and you can see this situation as a chance and not as a fail.
I keep my finges crossed for you!!

To jo, mark, tam, red,.......I hope that things are going better for you all!

From my life I can tell you I am still on the research to my shoulder problem: as you know, I had surgery in may and in august the reconstructed subscapularis-tendons teared again. my problem: this is a main stabilisator (?) on the front side of the shoulder and the next possibility to fix it is called pectoralis major tendon transfer. and there is the problem: as I already suffer from TOS we know that my claviclua-region is very small and so there is a big risk to squeeze an important nerv (don`t know the name).

today I will see the vascular surgeon and maybe he can explain the anantomical facts between TOS and the pectoralis major.

So far my news!
I will write more often the next week!
Very nice greetings and all the best
Barbara

DabboI don't pay attention to Giants. We usually only watch Cowboys and Philly. My son was crushed when Wahington beat Philly the other night. Thats ok, my husband keeps winning the football pool. Since 5 out of the 10 people in the pool are in my family its great. I don't have to dish out any money! My kids surely don't pay!

My son's freshman team won 46to 7 last friday. Great game. He plays again tomorrow. They have a great team. Younger sons team isn't as good but he's having a great time. This is my favorite time of year. daughter does field hockey so we are everywhere! Plus, 4 year old ballet! Have only 5 more minutes of quiet then off to work. My office manager called in sick. I have someone covering phones now but I have to go back in. My husband kept me awake half the night last night, no joke! His shoulder is still killing him from surgery and he had the tv on. he was up until 3 and I get up at 6. I was mad. I shouldn't have been but he can sleep late, I can't. He brought my daughter to the office for me but let her dress herself. Ladies, you know that means I had to bring her home to change her outfit. He also let her brush her hair. He did try. Sorry for venting but we all know how that goes. Oh well. Here comes the bus! bye! Linda.

Hope all is well....

I am still having cpu issues using Marc's now......so have taken it to (huge stroke of luck on this connection) my massage therapists husband!!! He does huge jobs usually so this should be easy for him to do. He is super nice as is she. I am hoping to get it back tonight. I hope that it is healed and all better!!!

I want to comment on this quote by Red......"My neck is really hurting tonight but after I heard that I'm ashamed to even complain about it."

I think that you do have a reason to complain. We all have our issues and some are bigger than others. No you are not in the same predicament as your friend however you are a person who deals with a real chronic problem that is also debilitating. you have as much reason to complain. Remember the invisible disabilities advocate information.
http://www.myida.org/
...you have days when you can't do anything right?? Days when you can't be yourself or even want to be......???? So we too have things to complain about....just at the right time and place....in front of your friend who is not doing well is not a good place....but at home to yourself yes you do have the right to complain....no you don't have cancer and won't die from tos unless you have a horrific vascular issue and vascular tos.....aside from that you will have to live with this FOREVER so we do have a right it is just a time and place thing.....

Sorry for the long winded post.....just wanted to make a point.....

love and hugs to all....
Victoria

Gibbrn,
I don't know how to take your post but if I had to make a judgment, I'd say it sounded a bit chiding. All I was saying is that after hearing what this man has been going through, there is no way I could or would complain about my neck because compared to him, well....there's no comparison. It was not directed at you or anybody else on here. That's just the way I am and the way I think and the way I feel, as anybody who's been on these forums while I've been here should know about me. I think I've been more than supportive to you and many other people here but frankly I'm tired of stating the way I feel about something on here, particularly if it doesn't even apply to anybody here, and having people get touchy about it. Especially when they are all for having a place to voice their own opinions. Can't have it both ways. I've mentioned on here more than once that I'm not in as much pain as many here are but really, that doesn't even apply because my post was about a man dying of cancer and nothing else- no ulterior motives here. Compared to most here, I have nothing to offer, except support. But it's very tiresome to have to walk on eggshells because I might say something that somebody might decide they don't like. I've "met" alot of wonderful, kind people on here and made some good forum friends and I enjoy coming here and catching up with what all is going on with everybody but sometimes things just reach a point that you ask yourself why you still bother. Especially when you have to worry about every little thing you say setting somebody off. When other friends of mine left the forum I understood but tried to stick it out myself because it was worthwhile to me. But it's not worth it anymore- particularly if you only want to hear certain things or want to censor what's acceptable here. It's really tiresome and defeats the whole purpose of a forum that's supposed to welcome everybody and all opinions and view points. Best wishes to everybody, I hope you all find something or someone who can help your pain, but I think my time would be best spent somewhere else. I give up.

I must speak about this. I do not mean, in any way to offend anyone, BUT I have found also that I can NEVER say something positive about much of anything, nor have I ever felt I could. Yes, this forum is for support, and I have offerred support many times, and sometimes tried to offer helpful hints which are usually ignored.

I wanted to come here and catch up with some people I have something in common with, without feeling badly if I say something like "but I feel so fortunate I'm not worse, or speak of a sick friend and say something like Red just did about hers (only being positive I think) without being criticized.

I don't understand. I just don't get it. I haven't felt the worst pain, I've always said that, I've offerred support lots of times. Why can those of us who are not in severe pain EVER say anything positive?????????

As a totally neutral observer- i took vic's post only to mean that: even if you think your own problems are minor, you shouldn't feel bad about needing to complain about them once in a while.

Another interpretation would be: be kind to yourself if you need to complain, knowing that a quiet complaint now and then is healthy and normal.

I try to remember that myself, and keep my own complaining to a moderate, healthy level...you know, only once every 5 seconds or so...

Hi Red,

I in no way mean to belittle the horrors that your dear friend is going through. I am an ONCOLOGY NURSE. I have helped many people cope with this hell for over eight years. I know what cancer entails and have seen hundreds of people die. My support is based on these experiences.

I feel upset and frankly disenchanted that you would take this post as anything other than the support that I was offering.

My intention was well stated Johannakat.

I am merely stating that you do have a right to complain

Never is it my intention to do anything to hurt anybody this is not my style and never has been.

I was trying to be supportive in stating that you have all the rights in the world to do and feel what you normally do. When you have a friend in pain and dying then YES things are put into a different light.

I am sorry that you feel you are unable to comment on things herre. I feel very comfortable here and that I can say anything. I know that people will say what they will and I take all with kind words Unless an attack is clearly seen.

Hope you can read with an open heart and not read negative or assume negative where none was intended. I was merely trying to offer comfort and reaffirm your own pain is real as well as your friends.

Victoria

thanks to those who see that I am here to support only and would not intend harm to anybody.

One thing that happens on these posts is that bare words have no inflection, no voice tone, no warmth or soft sounds...so they can be misinterpreted or heard in different ways...and all are possible given the different situations where one is at on that day, etc.

It's happened to almost all of us here. God bless all involved here.

I've read a post and taken offense and later read it and thought, "gee, I was off-base" and I've also written a post and seen why someone else got a different take, as I didn't come across as I meant to, or thought I was.

This is the "danger" of the post / email. Even letters don't seem to have this, as the personal handwriting, and perhaps time of it, seem to remove the incidents of misgivings.

Anyways, that's my take in general, not specific to any posts here. And I am not taking any sides or saying anything other than just that these posts can be misleading so everyone just remember that we love eachother, which IS evident to me in the WHOLE of the posts. Try everyone to take in our WHOLE posts and give us all the benefit that we're all good people here, especially the group we've got going for a very long time now, and our new friends, too. I hope this does not come off as a flare, which would not be the result I want.

To Dabbo:

I apparently read over your job situation, and I remember two years after I left due to the TOS I got "fired" when I asked why my Bar dues were delinquent. All of a sudden I had to COBRA my insurance, and I hadn't even gotten approval from the damned WC for surgery yet...

Needless to say, I felt betrayed by the company who's NEW software full of mousing, and my diligence in working my *** off resulted in TOS, rewarded me with no get well card and a very nice kick in the butt firing. It hurt like HELL in the old ego dept.

You're not a throw-away, and I feel a lot of hope that you may return to the work force some day. You are a vital man, full of things to give, and their "business" decision sucks. Living well and happy is the best revenge, and when I feel as I do right now, I have to remember that and find my personal happiness again. (I am saying that to me.) So charge on, my man!!!

Red & PBJ, I can not really type that much at this time, but have to say that your voice is not only important here it is also welcome and has been missed... like I said it was almost like the old BT when the gang was all here! Unfortunately even there we all had spats and I do think pain does come into play with this... I know more than once I have typed something out of rage when feeling bad and regretted it later! For the most part I try take a deep beath and consider others feelings first, like I said it does not always come out that way and for that I am the 1st to appologize! God bless all ... can't type more Mark~n~Goober