Mark, thanks so much for your post. Much of what you have said is so true! Although not so much the perfectionist. haha As soon as she sees the doctor at the end of the month I'll update what he says. Money is also an issue for mom. Once her disability runs out and she only has her SS she will not be able to live on her own. So the option of her not living with any of us is moot at that point. With all her medical bills and meds alone she couldn't pay rent somewhere. So that is going to happen no matter what we want. Of course if her doctors find she cannot or should not live with someone based on what's going on, then we walk that bridge when it gets there.

She's my mom and cared for us when we needed it. Maybe she wasn't the perfect mom but she is mom. My main concern and question is how to handle this when it happens so not to walk into it blindly.

and thank you very much.

Sandy

thats one reason for her to move to Illinois now. When she still can
establish residency. So that she can then get into assited living.

And that would be income range I think. I forgot you lived in Illinois,
I live in Indiana. I had a awful rude awakening today. I had to
change Derrick's doctor for about 45 days from now.

He is on medicaid now.

Donna

hi sandy please check out the stickys it,s all to common when people are faced with a personalty change of a loved one to say how can we fix it for them. its hard for the people around the injured person but understanding is the key,its best to not make a big issue of things but stand your ground on safety issues regarding your mom and others perhaps a visit to one of the organizations listed may help you and your mom cope

Sandy,

Is she getting Social Security Disability?

If so, her Social Security retirement benefit will be the higher of SSDI or SS Retirement. If SSDI pays more, she will continue to get the higher amount.

No, her widows pension is higher than what disability would give her.