[hardtimes]

What Up Peoples,
Its been a minute since i posted. Six months since my brain injury. I have been doing very different at times. On a positive note Ive written 200 rough pages of songs, poems and stories, for my personal therapy. Been learning guitair and being a dad. My kid and baby mama are excelling in school. Ive been maintaining at work and even getting bonuses. I am a cartographer(mapmaker) for the government.Got five years in the field and am 29 years old.

About a week and a half ago I totaled my car.
-Brakes locked up at 60 mph swirved to miss the car in front of me
-ended up on the other side of major highway going 60 mph head on into four lanes of traffic going northbound.
-swirved back into the median into a four foot ditch and between to guardrails about 10 feet apart
-rattled around like a ping pong ball until finally totaled my car thru a guardrail.

The crazy thing is I didnt get another concussion I messed up my back and neck tho. No other cars were involved it was just my car. was in the hospital for a day and am now on muscle relaxers and pain killers. Its been rough. Insurence wont cover nothing i had the bare minimum I screwed with being out a car but Im alive. Thank the cosmos Im alive.

My symptoms so far aside the acci=dent have been
-low grade nasuea
-facial tingling
-headaches migraines
-visual jumpiness
-slurred speech
-confusion
-dissassociative disorder

I have healed the speech, confusion and issociative disorder. Almost got rid of the tingling and low grade nausea. I can still get visual jumpiness and wicked migraines. These are my last two nemises. Any suggestions.

I have to work but have thought about trying to go on disability to properly heal. Im having struggles between just surviving and enjoying life and being myself i do not want to give in to this injury.

Thanks vini for posting that poem on christmas eve. This injury can be very hard on will power and motivation and sometimes all we can do is wonder why. You guys are very brave and strong. Much love and respct due. Thanks mark and hockey and everyone else for surviving, fighting and posting.

We learn from expirience thank you guys for valuble lifes lessons. Right now my dreams and reality are fighting inside my mind and my common sense tells me i need to seek shelter to unwind. heres rough draft paragraph of page 150 of my soon to be self published bookwrote about the changing shapes throughout time

bounds of clay
confines of our atmospheres
wont dissapear on the fringe
verging forward in time
surface the cauldrens bubbles
concaved with cosmic space
crescent shapes glow
overtop the gnarled landscape
spiral around uncharted minds
not even dying is escape


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