Becca has made some excellent points. Especially <Accepting this junk stinks but it is better to deal in reality than pretending that we're the same as we were pre-injury. >

Her comments about her kids just laughing off the wrong use of a word or such shows how much family can come to you support. We need to learn to laugh with our family. Laughter is a stress reliever.

As I said in a previous thread. When we learn to say to others, " I have a brain injury and sometimes it does strange things" and learn to believe this ourselves, we can start to change and learn to work-arounds and other accommodations that make life so much easier. It is amazing how our kids pick up on our behaviors.

I was watching some friends kids while mom had a chance to get out of the house with dad. I played a recording of wolf pups howling. Once the kids identified the sounds as wolf pups, I asked why they would be howling. With some clues, they realized it was because mom and dad wolf were away from the den. I asked why mom and dad would be away. One quickly answered, "Because they need some alone time." There was not bitterness or negative attitudes. They understood the value of alone time for mom and dad.

With a little help at understanding our symptoms and the modeling of seeing us accept our struggles, our kids can become very supportive and helpful.

Regarding going on disability, it is a tough and humbling decision. I would bet that most who have made this decision will agree that we put off the decision to go on disability much longer that we should have. Once we start the disability application process, we often get access to information that helps us better understand the extent of our disability.

Disability, whether short term, long term, or permanent is an option we need to keep available. Sometimes, by denying our condition, we hamper our chances of getting disability at a later date.

There is great value at being evaluated for disability, even if it only give us a marker of our current condition. Then, if our condition gets worse, we have that marker for comparison.

That humbling decision can also be a watershed event in causing a change in our attitude about ourselves and how others perceive us.

Thank you, these have been helpful.

I went into work to do some odd projects to see where I am. Well, 6 hours done over three days and it took me a day and a half to recover. I couldn't look down the street at night (street lights too bright), headaches, confusion, stuttering, and I felt like I was foggy and drunk. So I guess that answers that question.

Funny thing, right as I realized that this is the right choice, I got an email from work stating that they will have to replace me until I can come back to work. I am fortunate that they are so supportive, and will continue to give me side projects that will help me.

I too have found that repetitive tasks are easier, and require less recouprative time.

Humbling, yes it is. Right decision, I now see that it has to be. And I am happier knowing that if/when I can go back to work, my job will be there.

Thanks for the input!

Joanne,

I wonder if you could put together a job where you facilitate the adoption of rescued animals over the internet. Just an occasional visit to the shelters to get pictures to post with a reasonable locator fee per animal. Often, those too close to an organization get stuck in the bureaucracy.

You could also try to establish it as a pet finder operation. Prospective pet owners who are too busy during the work day to visit the shelters could put in a wish lists. You could help them with their choice by interviewing the family and home.

As you know, many rescues are the result of bad decision making on the part of the new pet owner.

I would bet there are opportunities to benefit others who are overloaded with their job duties, whether they are at the shelters or the prospective owners. Your contacts and experience should open a few doors.

Such an endeavor could be just what you need to augment disability income and keep you 'alive.'

I've been hoping to set up an old fashioned 'fix it shop' and fix things that are usually thrown away. I can fix almost anything. It would give me a chance to have people come to me for personal contact. Difficult otherwise since I do not drive anymore.

What are your strong skill sets and passions?

Hi Mark,

I think that I can still get some hours with the shelter even being on long term disability as that is coming out of insurance.

As far as strengths and passions, I retrain abused and traumatized dogs. I can do some training on the side as long as I dont overload and I still have rib/shoulder issues to deal with. I can always do cat/dog sitting, especially with special needs as I have had to work a lot with post surgery/hit by car and severe neglect.

I find if I do some admin work at home, or repetative tasks, I can at least manage how much I can do, without the distraction of someone at my office door every 20 seconds.

Planning has started for a huge fundraiser in Sept so I may be able to help do some prep work there.

These suggestions help, it makes me think of things to do to keep in the loop. I am not one to sit still, so this has definetly been a lesson in patience!

I have to say, it must be amazing to be able to fix anything! I can fix animals, but couldn't put up a shelf!

Have you found any brain injury support groups? You would likely benefit from the support you will find in a brain injury support group.

Last Friday, my wife and I we 'babysitting' for friends. They have four kid, 8, 6, 3, and 1. We were playing with the sofa cushions when I noticed the sofa bed with a block of wood under it. Elijah told me that it wasn't a sofa bed anymore because it was broke. I asked him to find me a Phillips screw driver and wire cutting pliers. By the time his parents came home, I had pulled the sofa apart, pulled the old nails and staples and reglued the frame back together.

My kids (grown now) had a saying, "Dad can fix anything but popped balloons and broken light bulbs." Except, I can fix this goofy brain., although I still get a lot of use out of it.

I would bet that the animals you work with realize your struggles. My two beagles can read me like a book. They have observed my deterioration and just like to hang around me. They are 14 1/2 y's old. Both are deaf. One is mostly blind, Chuck. Sally has degenerative disc disease in her back end and is slowly losing her sight too. Their meds cost as much as mine.

Being able to just slow down and meet them at their speed, like the traumatized dogs you see, is a great benefit. I can usually make friends with just about any dog. I surprise my customers who have rowdy dogs. I will kneel down so they can smell my face. This disarms them very quickly. They will either become a nuisance wanting my attention or decide to just walk away and leave me alone.

I think working with animals is a good exercise for PCS subjects.