Andy55,

Do you have anyone who can observe your sleeping? You may be getting poor sleep due to breathing irregularities. I have sllep apnea of the Centralk typer. My diaghram stops pulling breaths for minutes at a time. This prevents REM sleep when the brain heals fro the days stresses.

A take home sleep test with a pulse ox monitor to record you oxygen levels will help diagnose this problem. Most sleep specialists are focused on Obstructive Sleep Apnea and have minimal interest or knowledge of Central Sleep Apnea.

I was told I could not have sleep apnea because I do not snore. My wife has watched me stop breathing up to twelkve times in a hour. She knows I will have a bad day if my breathing is irregular, especially in the early morning. She tries to wake me when she notices my apnea.

Using the links you provided we are scheduled for a consult with an upper cervical chiro this Friday. Her neuro was supportive but cautious. I'll keep you posted.

Spouseofpcs,
You're welcome. It makes me feel better telling it. I really haven't talked to others about our situation. I think it is a positive sign that you are seeing improvement after a few months. My wife had no symptoms of pcs for 2 1/2 months. She was being treated by a GP and seeing a PT for the stiff neck. She was also seeing a pschycologist because of anxiety attacks after the accident and was later diagnosed with PTSD. Looking back the signs were there but everyone missed them until she decided to return to work. Her symptoms went full blown when she pulled into traffic leaving work. The car lights set it off and here we are. You are right it can set things back.
I know how you feel watching life go on around you. It has to be especially tough with 2 young children. Our 3 kids are ages 17,22 and 26. The 2 oldest are out on their own but our 17 year old is still home and shares the same feelings I do. Rest and time are key to recovery....one day at a time. I hope things continue to improve for her.
Tim M.

I can relate for sure. Husb fell almost one year ago. He has had cognitive therapy, PT neck injuries (x 3) and saw counselor. The counselor first said he felt he could help but would need 5-6 months of treatments. Then after listening and talking w/ him decided he should speak w/ his Neurologist. Husb wanted me present, as I am his memory when his fails. He is a completely different person. No joy, laughter, intimacy, feelings except grouchiness.

He was able to return to work, this has made him worse. I know that all ppl are different, not meaning to say this will be your wife in any way, but to say we as caregivers need to be able to support each other.

My husband is the love of my life. But it is lonely, when he returns from a long day at work he doesn't feel like talking. I've learned to stay quiet not ask too many questions which aggravates him. To go out in a large public place, the lights and noises causes his brain to overload. If we have the kids over, after that he sleeps sometimes all day and night.

He can pretend to be the "old self" in front of others for a couple of hours but it taxes his brain too.

I hope and pray that we caregivers can find each other to get tips on what works, etc. I'm blessed in many ways, just trying to learn to live and love the new husband I have.

God bless you all.

Wife......,

Have you looked for a Brain Injury Support Group in your area? Some have good support for caregivers/spouses. I know you want to inquire about his day and discuss other matters, but trying to respond when one is struggling with flat affect can be frustrating. Trying to avoid abstract questions or subjects may help. I know it is a struggle. Women tend to discuss more relational and feeling oriented subjects. The PCS mind can really struggle with those ideas.

My best to you.

Not sure if I can help anyone here, but my wife and I (im the one with the injury) have talked about this over and over.

She says im a totally different person, like not even close the guy I was. She pointed out a lot of things, and I listened and wrote it down. Its made me aware of who I am now compared to who I used to be. Im working extremely hard at it, and she says shes slowly seeing a lot of me husband wise return. Granted its exhausting, but I had to learn to live with the pain and the effects of a brain injury, and not let it control you.

Im not the kind of person that gives up on anything, or accepts a negative change easily. Im a bit over a year, it would of been easier to give up 6 months ago and accept the new me. Acceptance equals defeat in my mind. While I havent accepted this, im learning to live with it. Try talking to your spouses. Ask them the hard questions. Its going to be a multiple time conversation, but it needs to be done. My wife did this to me, and I hated it at the time because it made me extremely emotional and feel less like a husband and father. But it needs to be done, trust me. Once you are both on the same exact page, stuff flows a lot easier. For me now its easier to be the husband to her that she married. Granted im still far away from that man I used to be, but theres light at the end of the tunnel so to speak.

Just keep trying, its possible. If you need anymore assistance, just private message me. Maybe I can assist you in what to ask, or have my wife respond to your questions if you private message me.

Take Care.

imagine 25 years of this. All i can do sometimes is cry.

valleylow,

Welcome to NeuroTalk.

Do I understand you correctly that you have been support for a husband who has been dealing with PCS or worse for 25 years ?

What can we do to help and support you ?