Did the NeuroPsych just say your results were normal or did he give you any scores? Many NP's misinterpret the results due to bias against persistent concussion symptoms. They will also put too much emphasis on the IQ related scores.

How long did the NP Assessment take?

Did you do the Trail Making Test where you followed the numbers for Trail A and alternated between numbers and letters for trail B? If so, did he report your times? This test is often misinterpreted.

It may help to post some of the NP's comments and scores. Their excuses for your behaviors and other symptoms can sometimes be explained as they apply to a concussed patient.

Regarding depression, it does not always manifest as down feelings. Sometimes, it is just the lethargy and slowed thinking. Think of it as mental fatigue that may cause a flat emotional affect. Feeling nothing is just as much depression as feeling negative. Enduring these feelings without anxious reactions is a good direction to take.

Like I said before and Klaus confirmed, she really needs to get on board. If you do not recover to you old self, will she be willing to support and put up with the PCS you? It takes a special person with genuine sacrificial love to support a person with persistent PCS. Just ask my wife or any wife of the other men on this forum.

Has she experience you having a PCS outburst? They can be scarey.

Is there a neurological rehab hospital near you? Maybe they have a counselor or social worker who can help explain this face to face.

Hope you can find the help you need to help her understand.

My best to you.

That speaks volumes right there.

Cautionary tale: My ex-wife and I dated for four years before marrying. I cautioned her in depth of the dangers of being in an intimate relationship with me and why. I gave her a full history of my injuries, and the resulting challenges that came from those injuries. I did all I could to educate her and she appeared to be willing to learn.

Last year, after seven years of marriage, she called it quits. I could better understand her bailing on me if she had no forewarning of these health issues. I certainly understand I'm not an easy person to live with. BUT: Even with four years prior knowledge, she still could not or would not accept the changes that I had warned her might come as I grew older. And she kept it to herself until the day she dropped the bombshell.

Please...be ever so careful before you commit to marriage. Especially if your lady is in denial of your situation.

I've recently had a load of neuropsych tests, all of which had results of 'average' or above. However the psychologist has never suggested that this means that I'm fine and it's just my worrying, she clearly recognises that there are issues which aren't covered by these tests, particularly the fatigue and other symptoms that come from continued stimulation - like my brain can function at a normal level when it needs to (eg for testing), but if I challenge it for too long or too often all the symptoms come back.

My workplace recognises this too, currently giving me work which is at times actually quite challenging, but letting me do it with reduced working hours, a slower pace etc.

Sounds like you've been really unlucky with family, fiancee and even a neuropsychologist who don't understand PCS. It sounds to me like it would be really helpful for you to get a proper diagnosis from someone who knows what they are talking about.

Failing that it sounds like the article I linked to in my previous post might really help. If she's so keen on diagnoses from a 'proper doctor' she'll have to pay attention to a summary of the evidence from the Royal College of Psychiatrists, which defines post-concussion syndrome as symptoms following a concussion which:-

You've had a concussion, you have a number of these symptoms, therefore you have PCS, simple. There's no other way needed to confirm or disprove the diagnosis. My wife has been really supportive throughout, but I don't think she really got what was happening til she read that article.

Does she know you're thinking of postponing the wedding? That ought to make her sit up and listen at least. Or maybe tell her you're worried you might get confused and say the name of an ex-girlfriend at the altar

All this stress can't be doing you any good

They said my verbal scores were good and that I could've done better with some other test(didn't specify which.) They sent my report to my neurologist who just mentioned everything was fine. I will call and have them send me a copy of the report. I think I did good on the IQ portion where they asked general questions/simple math. It was mostly recalling numbers,sequences, images I had trouble with and felt a lot of strain while doing them.

3 hours which included 40 min personality true false test. They said I didn't need anymore testing and I was "ok."

No. I did a test where I cross out all 2 and 7 mixed in a bunch of rows with numbers and letters that was suppose to test if I had attention deficit. I did well on that test.

I've accepted this is how I am for now. I don't have any anxiety about it, but occasionally frustration. I'd rather stay off medication if possible but perhaps it might help me?

I have lost it a couple times where I got angry and had to leave the room to try to calm myself down. I know this is not good for me and something needs to change. It's like talking to a brick wall and thinks a magic depression pill will cure me. When she says stuff like, "I think this, your brother thinks this, and your parents think you're depressed. Why do you think everyone is wrong," I start to lose it. I acknowledge that depression is a side effect of PCS but that's just a piece of the puzzle.

Everything makes sense to me and I'd be lost without this forum. Getting advice from people that have gone through similar experiences is invaluable. I know I'm not alone and people can make improvements with this condition. All things considering, I feel like I'm holding up really well.

Thank you for your support.

My comment <Is there a neurological rehab hospital near you? Maybe they have a counselor or social worker who can help explain this face to face.> was aimed at your fiance'. She needs someone to tell her face to face about you condition. I understand you know what's up, but often family receives information better from a third party.

I know, I don't know why such a simple concept is hard to understand especially when I was in a violent crash. A couple days after the accident when I was taking muscle relaxes and pain relievers, I said to her, "I can't believe nothing is wrong with me. How did I walk away from that accident with just minor bruises and neck/back strain. It's a miracle." She thinks I'm reading the internet, self diagnosing myself, and this is causing my symptoms. She acknowledges I have some concussion side effects, but insist it's my stress and anxiety that's the main problem.

At that time, I was feeling well mentally but pain medication blocked a lot of it and I thought it would get better within a week or so. The 1st week was really bad where I was very depressed, had major anxiety relating to my accident, and difficulty sleeping. I got a lot better the 2nd week but haven't noticed an improvement from where I am now. If anything, it's getting worse.

I actually want to get married. I said it's one night, and I'll be able to have fun and it's all about the ceremony for me. It is unfortunate that the wedding cost a lot of $ and I won't be 100% for it but who's to say if I'm going to be better a year(I certainly hope I will be.) I imagine it's hard for her to marry someone that right now isn't the person she's known for 10 years and wants the day to be perfect. She has it in her mind that a depression pill will cure all and I'll go back to my normal self. Maybe it would help. I don't know. If there was a magic pill to go back to normal, I'll take it.

No it's not.

It sounds like you've got a much more level head, and much more insight, than I did in the first few months. I'm sure you'll be fine, it'll make you feel like crap afterwards but you've accepted that already.

Having got married last year, thankfully before my concussion, the most challenging thing on the day by far was the speech, which will be extra hard for you.

Plan a short one, perhaps even use your PCS as an excuse for making it short (when other people don't believe in your PCS it becomes kind of embarassing to mention it, but if you sound like you're not accepting it, how will they?). Just a list of people to thank, say how beautiful the bridesmaids are looking and say lots of soppy things about the bride, is all that's really necessary.

The first dance could be hard too, so keep it simple - again a shame as these things are supposed to be fun.

I worked full time for a whole for a week after my concussion. Partly I was lacking insight but partly my symptoms just hadn't kicked in yet, it's not uncommon. Something to do with a build-up of toxic neurotoxins from dead brain cells causing a chemical chain reaction which Mark can explain much better than me!

Hopefully her main problem is that she's so hung up on the wedding being a perfect day that she just psychologically can't accept something that might get in the way of it. Perhaps once it's over she can start to be more supportive.

I think she should know that she's running the risk of building up a fair bit of lasting bitterness between the two of you - the one time you really need her support she isn't there for you. I'm not sure I would be as understanding as you are being.

I'm sure she's perfectly intelligent enough to understand that the brain is a part of the body just like any other, and can suffer varying degrees of injury in a car crash just like any other.

And after the wedding you can become a right lazy slob for as long as it takes - you deserve it!

I guess the hardest part is finding a Dr. that we can go to to explain what's going on. Not someone that's just going to say I'm fine/or prescribe meds when I don't need them. This what my fiance wrote to me

"I never said or even thought that all will instantly be better if you take anxiety meds. its so frustrating that that's what you are taking from my comments and our conversations. all I was saying was that it might help things and it definitely won't hurt."

I'm not going to take medicine just because she thinks it'll help me and there's articles saying it helps patients with PCS. My anxiety levels are not bad except in certain environments. Why would I take a pill for that when I could just as easily not put myself in those situations??? I feel like the smart thing is to see if this gets better on it's own in 2 months while keeping my stress levels low and a healthy diet. If that doesn't work, perhaps then consider taking something.

Do I see a psychologist, psychiatrist, neuropsychologist?

Her most erroneous statement was a bold one <all I was saying was that it might help things and it definitely won't hurt.">

Taking meds might definitely hurt. Meds should be a last resort except for some of the very low dose meds such as amitriptyline and some anti-seizure meds like gabapentin.

An SSRI (anti-depressant and anti-anxiety) combined with Xanax (anti-anxiety) can be a dangerous combination. It is not uncommon for the uninformed doctor to prescribe the SSRI for daily use with the Xanax as a back up for occasional use such as your wedding.

The other variable is how your body and brain will respond to any meds that are prescribed. I take a strong meds to deal with anxiety/OCD issues that manifest from sensory over-stimulation. The specific med is a honeymoon killer and takes 6 weeks to take full effect and can take a few months to taper off slowly to avoid the misery of stopping the med.

The short acting meds like Xanax have their own side-effects. Here is a list of the side effect of Xanax:
Alprazolam (Xanax) may cause side effects. Tell your doctor if any of these symptoms are severe or do not go away:

drowsiness, light-headedness, headache, tiredness, dizziness irritability, talkativeness,

difficulty concentrating, dry mouth increased salivation, changes in sex drive or ability, nausea

constipation, changes in appetite, weight changes difficulty urinating, joint pain

Some side effects can be serious. The following symptoms are uncommon, but if you experience any of them, call your doctor immediately:

shortness of breath, seizures seeing things or hearing voices that do not exist (hallucinating)

severe skin rash, yellowing of the skin or eyes, depression memory problems, confusion, problems with speech

unusual changes in behavior or mood thinking about harming or killing yourself or trying to do so

problems with coordination or balance


Not a nice list of side effects.

Maybe a physiatrist with good knowledge of PCS or a NeuroPsychiatrist or to a lesser extent a NeuroPsychologist.

Where do you live? A Brain Injury Support group contact may be able to direct you to some good help.

Has she read the TBI Survival Guide?

I am known to be bold with some of my comments. Life can be a treacherous event to the uninformed. Regarding postponing your wedding, I think the bigger issue is not how you will handle the wedding, but rather how she will handle the marriage if you have some persistent PCS symptoms for the next year or two. As has been said, she needs to get on the same page as you.

Do I see a psychologist, psychiatrist, neuropsychologist?"


I'm placing my vote for a physiatrist like Mark suggested. They specialize in rehabilitation. Isn't that what you need?

My hubby saw a neurologist for almost 6 months with very little progress. He went to a physiatrist who immediately began a treatment plan (physical therapy 2 x's week and speech therapy 1x week - both covered under our insurance - speech therapy is STRONGLY interlaced with cognitive therapy which is NOT covered thru insurance by itself but can be part of the speech therapy sessions which IS covered thru insurance) and we are seeing steady monthly progress now.

He also does Lumosity website on a regular basis and can see increasing scores / capabilities.

Praying for wisdom and guidance for youl...
Amy