My advice would be to let him sleep and rest as he needs to. The worst thing you can do is push him too hard too quickly. You may think you are doing him good by encouraging him to do things--and sometimes you are--but it's always best to rest and defer to his judgment. Don't make him feel like he has to do X or Y, or that he is under pressure to do something. That will not help.

I also second the point about making one feel loved and not like a burden. It is vital that you support him. It will be difficult for you, but it is much more difficult for him. No matter how bad you think you feel, he feels much, much worse. That doesn't mean you shouldn't feel upset or distressed, it just means you need to be careful to ensure he knows you are there for him. Any semblance of a 'tough it out' attitude is not only emotionally damaging, it could set back his recovery.

This will help him more than anything else you can do.

Good luck.

Thank you so much for the replies, they're really helpful.

Well, he's been home a week now and he spends a lot of time resting in bed (not always sleeping) so I'm just letting him do that, the rest is obviously what his brain needs. He's getting a lot of headaches and when he's up and about, gets dizzy easily. He's clearly got some short-term memory issues too, for example he keeps asking me what a particular med is for, normally he would retain that once I'd told him.

I've noticed that when he gets ample rest, his mood is fine, but when he gets overtired (usually in the evenings if he tries to sit up for too long watching TV) his mood becomes quite snappy and almost unreasonable. So I think he needs to learn his limits in terms of tiredness.

He's also feeling quite depressed which I can't blame him for! It's not helping matters that he can barely hear, and he's got no time scale on how long it's going to take for him to get better...I always say that I know he's going to make a full recovery (even though I don't know that) because I know I need to stay positive for him.

Hi and welcome. My TBI also involved a skull fracture with subdural hematoma, and I also had deficits in executive functioning, so I can relate. The mere fact he is ready to be released after only 2 weeks is a good sign.

To the extent you can, try to "safety proof" the house. With the hearing loss, balance could also be affected.

Try to reintroduce him to things that rebuild the higher level executive functions. This could be a simple as planning a week's worth of meals, then listing those meals out, and from the meal list develop a shopping list. If he has follow up medical appointments have him plan the appointments on a calendar, along with estimated time to arrive and return, transportation logistics, etc.

These things seem simple but in order to reestablish those functions it will take practice on simpler items then progress to the more complicated ones.
It will also take patience and practice. When I was just home from the hospital I would repeat myself frequently. It was very useful to me for my wife to point out when I did this.

If it hasn't been done already, I suggest he be evaluated by a clinical neuropsychologist and get recommendations for outpatient occupational and cognitive therapy, and they can give you additional guidance.

Best wishes to you both.

Hi Jamie,

Thanks for checking in and letting us know how it's going.

The idea that he will have to learn his limits will probably be tough for a while...

I'm 20 months from a concussion that caused me to have an increase in intracranial pressure for six months after the injury before it was discovered and relieved.

I still have some trouble figuring out what my limits are - although I'm much better at it than I was a year ago. A part of the issue, for me, is that as I improve my limits change and I need to reevaluate what they are and in doing so I can overreach them. Also, sometimes, the warning signs I get come on suddenly and I'm not in a location where I can immediately leave and rest; like at the dentist's office or somewhere that I've been given a ride. I've certainly had my share of cranky behavior and I think my boyfriend who's an atheist is actually a saint.

I repeated myself a lot too, and would sometimes ask the same question right after hearing the answer not remembering that I had just asked it and had already been told heard the answer. My boyfriend would just answer it again and I also found it helpful that he pointed out when I was doing this.

We discovered that I wasn't forthcoming with how I was feeling. It's just the kind of person I am. I guess, typically, men are like that too... I had been in a lot of pain for a while before anyone knew that I was in such severe pain. Try to make sure he is communicating with you about how he's feeling. He might not really know how he's feeling, or he might not be able to assess how he's feeling in order to communicate it. It has turned out to be very important for my recovery for me to make sure the people around me knew how I was feeling physically, mentally and emotionally. Although sometimes it's still just overwhelming cognitively for me to try to communicate it.

Hang in there.