[lah0816]

Please check out these poems by Author Sandra Linely


All in Your Head
The skeptic said,

You look fine,

So you are fine.

The problems are all in your head.



My husband said,

I love you, but

You're not who you used to be.



My daughter said,

You're no fun any more.

I want to run away.



I said,

Please help me.

I'm lost, confused.

My head hurts.



I can't remember,

Can't think clearly,

Loud noises bother me.



I lose control, I rage,

Become distracted,

Am always tired.

Learning comes slowly now.



I've lost myself

And I'm so ashamed.

Help me, please,

With these problems in my head.



The doctor said,

The changes are real.

They won't go away.

So sorry your head can't be fixed.



But here are

Pills to sleep

Pills to stay awake

Pills to improve memory

Pills to prevent seizures

Pills to control mood swings

Pills to dull the pain

From the problems that are in your head.



The skeptic said,

You look fine

So you are fine.

The problems are all in your head.



Stranger in my Place
My husband has a new wife

My daughter, a new mother.

And sometimes I think I hate

The stranger who has taken my place.



It's painful just to watch her

Do what I once did.

She cooks (a little), cleans (not well),

And dreams her little dreams.



But where is the laughter, the passion,

The two of us used to know?

Where, the bright hopes and the wonder

That bound us, heart and soul?



And yet my husband loves her

(I wonder how he can)

A person slow and awkward,

Limited and sad.



The accident that brought her

Saw the old me die

Left this strange new person

To carry on in my stead.



Now my daughter calls her Mommy,

And trusting takes her hand.

My husband calls her Dearest

And draws her into his arms.



But deep within me something

Remembers and protests,

I refuse, I will not be

This stranger who has taken my place!

[todayistomorrow]

Pretty powerful words and can definitely relate. I'm currently having a very difficult time with my relationship and also face the internal battle every day of battling PCS. I don't like to use the term battling but that's exactly what it is.

I'm not willing to accept this is who I am now because if it is, I'm screwed. I can't live a happy life like this. No one has any idea of the pain I go through(besides other people that suffer similar symptoms) making it that much worse that I fight it alone. If another person tells me it's all in my head I'm going to lose it.

I'm starting to meditate daily and learn some Tai Chi techniques my Uncle passed down to me when I was young in order to help with wrestling(definitely suffered at least 1 bad concussion from this). I fear I may never recover and long for the day that I wake up with a claer head and not think about my PCS.

Why me and what if scenarious plague my thoughts. How do I rid these negative thoughts from my mind? What purpose do they serve? I would like to give in to the universe and go with the flow of the river like the Toaist way, but I don't like where the river is going.

Why is it that we don't appreciate health until it get's taking away?

[shezbut]

"All in Your Head" fits me to a perfect "T"!

Unfortunately, but not particularly uncommon, my husband was one of the skeptics like the one in this poem. While a little part of me does hold some resentment towards my ex-husband, most of my feelings have been turned inward into depression and self-hate. I really cannot blame my ex for losing his understanding and desire for me.

And I didn't have the strength or self-control to become the primary caregiver to my 2 young daughters, which led to me being the secondary parent. It has been 4 or 5 years (I can't remember which) since my TBI. My fight to do my best continues.