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Old 06-07-2014, 11:54 PM #1
Socks Socks is offline
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Default Poor impulse control

Anyone else have this? I have two things I'm itching to do and it's taking a lot of willpower not to do them. I want to buy a condo, but there's a lot more to that process than just picking out a place and I know that not to mention my lease isn't up til the end of the year. And I also want to adopt another kitten. I already have 3, which is one more than my lease allows for (shhhhh) and all the places I've talked to say they have to verify things with the landlord. I would love to find some loophole. It's dominating my thoughts today. I'm not thinking about much other than move out now and another kitten now.
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What Happened: 3/6/14 I was leaning in to pick my phone off the floor of my car and hit my head on the door frame. No immediate problems but I woke up the following day with blurred vision, nausea, fogginess and memory issues. Headaches came the next day along with speech problems. CT scan was clear. Took a few weeks off work. Went back for half days for two weeks.
Then: 4/14/14 While still recovering from the first concussion I hit my head on the edge of my desk. Immediate headache, nausea and blurred vision. Doctor referred me to a neurologist who prescribed physical therapy for my neck, as I get incredibly stiff/sore necks daily which helps to bring on the headaches. Doctor also referred me to a counselor, who is helping me to cope with the anxiety and panic that has come up in my post concussion world. I deal with severe sensory problems and the frequent bout of aphasia.
And Then : 10/6/14 I was cleaning something (ok cat puke) up from underneath my new glass table when I stood up too fast right into it and voila, trauma #3. I was out of work for a month and a half this time. Noise problems, aphasia, etc.
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Old 06-08-2014, 01:03 AM #2
Mark in Idaho Mark in Idaho is offline
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Socks,

I think you need to let the rules help you with your decisions. Many condo associations do not allow more than 2 pets. Scamming your current landlord is also not a good idea. If you can not be disciplined to follow those rules, how will you be disciplined to be a responsible property owner ? Condo owners are responsible to the bank and the condo home owners association.

Think of this. It is a lot easier to abide by the 2 cat rule than it is to have to decide which cat(s) you are going to give up to a rescue organization or the animal shelter. Very few cats survive the animal shelter.
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Old 06-08-2014, 10:55 AM #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark in Idaho View Post

Think of this. It is a lot easier to abide by the 2 cat rule than it is to have to decide which cat(s) you are going to give up to a rescue organization or the animal shelter. Very few cats survive the animal shelter.
110% agree with this. Remember, your in a fragile state of mind. Dont put the cats in the same position.

Plus the stresses of moving will probably not be in the best interests of a recovering brain right now. Just food for thought.
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Old 06-08-2014, 10:57 AM #4
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Yeah you're absolutely right. I'm not going to do it. But that's what I was talking about. The thought came into my head and then all of a sudden I'm driving around from place to place looking for kittens and hoping their adoption policy doesn't include calling my landlord. It was such a strong impulse and I really wanted to go ahead with it. I guarantee you if I had found someone yesterday that didn't need to contact my landlord I would have another cat today. I didn't have that problem pre - concussion.
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What Happened: 3/6/14 I was leaning in to pick my phone off the floor of my car and hit my head on the door frame. No immediate problems but I woke up the following day with blurred vision, nausea, fogginess and memory issues. Headaches came the next day along with speech problems. CT scan was clear. Took a few weeks off work. Went back for half days for two weeks.
Then: 4/14/14 While still recovering from the first concussion I hit my head on the edge of my desk. Immediate headache, nausea and blurred vision. Doctor referred me to a neurologist who prescribed physical therapy for my neck, as I get incredibly stiff/sore necks daily which helps to bring on the headaches. Doctor also referred me to a counselor, who is helping me to cope with the anxiety and panic that has come up in my post concussion world. I deal with severe sensory problems and the frequent bout of aphasia.
And Then : 10/6/14 I was cleaning something (ok cat puke) up from underneath my new glass table when I stood up too fast right into it and voila, trauma #3. I was out of work for a month and a half this time. Noise problems, aphasia, etc.
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Old 06-09-2014, 05:08 AM #5
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My willpower/impulse control went down the toilet after the accident and still hasn't recovered.

Set up systems that help prevent you from making dubious decisions until you're fully better.

For the kitten/condo issue... well, clean your house. It sounds ridiculous, but researchers have found strong causation between tidy surroundings and willpower/impulse control. Make your bed, keep the whole place spotless. It isn't a magic cure, but it helps more than you'd think.

It might give you the leeway you need to make better decisions.

Source: Willpower, by Baumeister
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Old 06-09-2014, 06:51 AM #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Soak View Post
My willpower/impulse control went down the toilet after the accident and still hasn't recovered.

Set up systems that help prevent you from making dubious decisions until you're fully better.

For the kitten/condo issue... well, clean your house. It sounds ridiculous, but researchers have found strong causation between tidy surroundings and willpower/impulse control. Make your bed, keep the whole place spotless. It isn't a magic cure, but it helps more than you'd think.

It might give you the leeway you need to make better decisions.

Source: Willpower, by Baumeister
Interesting.
Plus, if I clean my house, I won't have the energy left to act on any ill-considered impulses.
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Old 06-09-2014, 08:21 AM #7
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Actually, that's one of the few blessings of my over whelming fatigue. It keeps me from following through on many (but not all) of my random "super good idea of the moments".

I sometimes fear what would happen if my fatigue ever lifted. Up until now, its been my main way to cope with my lack of impulse control. To the point that impulse control has not been a real issue.

"Luckily" its been over 2 years of debilitating fatigue with no improvement... and I don't know how it would ever improve... so maybe it won't be a big problem.

The only real impulse control evidence I have is more a lack of filter ... like swearing inappropriately. I try so hard, but out the wrong words slip especially if I'm tired or upset!

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Old 06-09-2014, 09:14 PM #8
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Somewhat tangentially related to this... it really sucks when you realize that some decisions you want to make are, at heart, really just ways to try to take control of your life because you feel a complete lack of it post - concussion(s). The cat thing - whatever. I'm not going to do it. It's stupid and I recognize that.

But I've been thinking about buying property for several months now. I went and talked with my parents today who gave me a reality check. A bit harsh and nothing I wasn't really expecting but it got me to thinking after the fact as to why it's become such an urge. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm 33 in a week and I'd really like to leave the apartment scene. But I realize a big part is just wanting to have control over a big aspect in my life because it feels like the TBI has taken control.

God I hate that. I was so independent. I did whatever I wanted to without considering this stupid little demon in my head. Now everything I do I have to take into account can I handle it? It sucks.

I know you guys know what that's like.
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What Happened: 3/6/14 I was leaning in to pick my phone off the floor of my car and hit my head on the door frame. No immediate problems but I woke up the following day with blurred vision, nausea, fogginess and memory issues. Headaches came the next day along with speech problems. CT scan was clear. Took a few weeks off work. Went back for half days for two weeks.
Then: 4/14/14 While still recovering from the first concussion I hit my head on the edge of my desk. Immediate headache, nausea and blurred vision. Doctor referred me to a neurologist who prescribed physical therapy for my neck, as I get incredibly stiff/sore necks daily which helps to bring on the headaches. Doctor also referred me to a counselor, who is helping me to cope with the anxiety and panic that has come up in my post concussion world. I deal with severe sensory problems and the frequent bout of aphasia.
And Then : 10/6/14 I was cleaning something (ok cat puke) up from underneath my new glass table when I stood up too fast right into it and voila, trauma #3. I was out of work for a month and a half this time. Noise problems, aphasia, etc.
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Old 06-09-2014, 10:12 PM #9
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Must watch myself, or actually hubby does, nearly brought home two kittens Sunday. Not a good idea.

I am more impulsive and have to remind myself to wait.
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*TBI with mild to severe damage November 2012 from car crash. Stroke with hemorage & 4 clots in veins in brain Feb/Mar 2015.

*Vestibular damage, PCS, hypercusis, severe visual processing and tracking issues, short term memory loss, headaches/migraines, occipital neuralgia, cognitive issues, neurological issues, brain fog, brain fatigue when over stimulated, twitching, vertigo, neck issues, nerve issues, PTSD, personality change, Since stroke left side weakness, rage, worsening of vestibular problems, recall, speech, memory.

*Can't drive or work. Have done occupational therapy, cognitive therapy, physical therapy. Learning work arounds, and strategies to be competent in daily life. Change your attitude/perspective changes your life. As TBI survivors this is a vital part of our healing and living.

*Working on getting to know and accept the new me.
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