I hear you on the difficulties of being a TBI mom.

With a young family, between kid activities and bedtime rituals, my area's evening support group meeting just won't work for me. TBI is isolating. Being a TBI mom, well... As women, we are socialized to care for others and ignore our own needs - no matter how pressing. The number 1 rule of motherhood is MOMS CAN'T GET SICK.

As moms, it's really hard for us to get the rest and quiet so important to TBI recovery. On the plus side, the desire to do better for our children provides powerful motivation to keep striving to improve. Frankly, I was so badly injured, if I didn't have a family that needed me, I think I would have just given up.

While it's not the case for me, perhaps there are other young moms in your support group. If so, maybe they'd be interested in pushing for a different meeting time and/or forming a smaller subgroup that was more accommodating for those on the mommy track.

I had some PTSD after my mva. Are you being treated for this? In addition to traditional talk/desensitizing therapies, some interesting work is being done with medications and memory. I think there is reason for optimism on this front.

Thank you Hockey. I sincerely appreciate your kind words. I am not one to post on online forums, however, in need of support. Thank you also for the advice on seeing about other moms in my local group. I do feel the same as you that my family is what I am living for.

I suggest you schedule a light day of activities so you can be rested enough to attend the support group. Many of us have to do just that in order to have a late day or evening activity.

Good advice Mark. Driving at night bother my eyes typically but I have not rested prior to an evening outing. I typically avoid them.

If you're having trouble with your night vision, speak to your optometrist. There are lens treatments that can help with that.

Yes, rest is so important - but so hard for a mom with young kids. Do you have friends and/or relatives that could give you some respite time?

Don't try to be "super mom," either. If you need to pop in a cartoon DVD, so you can get 30 minutes of quiet, it will not damage your children's future. What's important is to have a mom who is as healthy as possible.

Good idea to see the eye dr. I had not thought of that. My son associates night time with being at home so really, that is what we do

We do not have much in the ways of support for care for our son. I can count on 1 hand how many times my son has been with friends of ours or a babysitter. Usually we hang out with those friends as well. Working on that and school has been a good step. Our extended family does not live locally but when they visit we do take time to take a hike on our own.
We live rurally due to my dislike of living in town, prefer the country. I have been looking for a young adult close to us whom would be a good fit for my son. He does watch dvds but I typically get things done, however, understanding the importance to rest much more these days and we as a family are learning to adjust to this new knowledge of my TBI.

I opened my account for ssdi last month. Got overwhelmed with the application and stopped. Received a letter from them stating they will deny my claim if I do not complete by the 25th of this month. I made it through the printed application a couple days ago and completed my written letter of my ability to function this morning.

I went into my local ss office last Friday to talk about my neuropsyc report not being available until the 30th and what a horrible experience. I took a # and sat down until I was called. Every other person waiting was called over a microphone and was listed on the tv screen. My # was called by his voice and I realised that on his 2nd call. I said I just had a question about the 25th date due to my report not getting to me yet and he immediately started talking about what they needed from me, completed app and the release... just sign that. We are here to help, can we help.... I have pulled up your app and see you, are a working person... hummm... you have worked... kept talking and talking about the process and again how he was there to help me but he wouldn't let me speak. So when he was done I asked about the date and explained my report was to come after that.... he went into that I have had plenty of time to complete. I started to get overwhelmed, heart racing and began to tear up a, little and said, I wasn't being disrespectful, I thought I had more time to complete. He told me to compose myself and that he received a message from someone in the back that there was problem with our supposid conversation, he was doing all the talking, and if I wanted help with the application there was someone to help, said that over and over until I agreed to the help. Sat down at window 6... go to window 6, again, go to window 6 and she'll meet you there. So I went to window 6, metal shutter rolls up and was given a pen. She asked if I wanted her to file online for me because I was writing too slow. I asked if she would be able to print out the app she typed when we we done and said no. I decided to continue writing it out on my own and was told again I was taking too much time. It was not busy in the office, 5 or so people waiting so I clearly was not in the way. I told her thank you and that I was not comfortable and would complete at home, then I left.

My gosh. I felt bullied. All I wanted to ask was if I was right on having more time to complete. That is it.

I have all my Dr.'s reports except the final from my neuropsyc eval. I emailed my neuropsuchologist Monday requesting I hope to receive it by the 25th deadline. Would like to submit all together, however, if I do not receive in time, will submit all I have by the 25th and walk the rest in when in hand.

Amazing.

Goldenwillow, I just noticed that you are from the PNW. Me too! Whereabouts are you? I'm in WA. I haven't contacted my local group but plan to soon. This online forum thing and support group stuff is very strange to me too as I am not usually someone who asks for help, lets others in easily and I don't like being vulnerable. I am learning to adjust so many things in my life as I'm sure everyone with a TBI discovers.

Google "brain injury Washington" and you will find a number of web sites with information about support groups and other services in Washington state.

I turned in my application yesterday. It feels good to have that part of the process behind me. I turned it in, in person. I asked if there was any type of confirmation that I did so and the woman signed a # slip (the one you get when you check in ) and said her "John Hancock is all you need because my name is known around here". Alrighty. I had everything except my neuropsychological evaluation report which I am still eagerly awaiting. Supposed to receive by months end, which seems cannot come soon enough. The SSI woman said to just bring it in when received.

Waiting.