Not to be a pessimist, but after getting this disease as that is what it is. Our lives are half over, I am past 7 months into this. Honestly, I am better than before but no way near recovery. I know now that I will have problems for the rest of my life, whether it be tinnitus or brain fatigue or just finding happiness. Happiness came so easily to me,

I have had an amazing 30 years of life I guess after just getting one concussion my life is now going to be a slew of doctor visits and chronic illness. This is a chronic condition. People who get better also live with a deep emotional scar, I know that I will never be as happy as I was. That this reinvention of myself will not compare to my life before, that I had one chance to live this life and I ruined it by my own stupidity.

I hate this condition, I don't want to die because I know that there is no heaven and no hell and we only get this one consciousness. We are organic machines that are now broken, we evolved after millions of years to experience this beautiful universe and now we have broken ourselves beyond repair. This machine is sad that this is how his story went.

This is my exit from these forms, I have been obsessed about reading your stories. I am so sorry that we all lost our minds, I hope that we can connect to this earth and somehow still experience it's beauty. I hope one day I recover my smile, my happiness for existence as of now it is all gone. My New Years resolution is to put my heart and soul into getting better and trying to find beauty on this planet.

[QUOTE=This is my exit from these forms, I have been obsessed about reading your stories. I am so sorry that we all lost our minds, I hope that we can connect to this earth and somehow still experience it's beauty. I hope one day I recover my smile, my happiness for existence as of now it is all gone. My New Years resolution is to put my heart and soul into getting better and trying to find beauty on this planet.[/QUOTE]

Qtipsq,

If you happen to log back in I just wanted to tell you that I wish you the best on your healing and finding the beauty that does exist all around us in this world even in something as simple as a pebble one may kick away without giving it a thought.

It is easy to overlook the amazing things that surround us when we feel so awful and sideswiped in life by our injuries. You do have so much of your life left to live and experience the world though. It's just not going to be how you envisioned it pre-injury. I know that's a difficult idea to come to terms with.

I hope that your smile comes easily again and that you find some peace and happiness in 2015 and beyond.