My anxiety is palpable and often debilitating. I've been struggling with fear since sustaining my concussion last year - I'm not the same person anymore.

A significant issue for me is uncertainty regarding whether or not I've hit my head. Let me explain: I'll often have close calls where I'm very close to hitting my head, but I don't. Immediately following this, and looking back at the incident I will be uncertain as to whether or not I did hit my head. I doubt myself, and wonder what really happened.

This is terrifying for me. It becomes a terrible debate in my mind which always ends up with me assuming I did indeed hit my head. These events happen almost everyday - it's completely out of control and stealing my life. I've been diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder.

At work today, I was walking up (concrete, brick) steps and tripped. I very likely outstretched my hands and did not hit my head. But - in hindsight - I can't be so sure. I doubt myself. It's as if I don't have a firm grasp on events which had happened just 30 seconds prior.

These situations spur brutally intrusive thoughts and emotions which I struggle to keep in check.

Thank you for listening.

What help are you getting for your OCD ? It sounds like your concussion gave you a target for your OCD thoughts. It sounds similar to the person who constantly checks to see if they locked the door or turned off the coffee pot.

I wonder if there is any kind of a close fitting hat that you can wear that would show a mark if you did impact something. Then, you can inspect the hat for a mark. No mark means no contact.

Another concept is to learn about the statistical chances of a concussion. There are 320,000,000 people in the US. 1,500,000 concussion are suffered each year. The vast majority are suffered in car wrecks and contact sports. If 20% are not car wreck or sports related, that means 300,000 out of 320,000,000 suffer a concussion so your chance is less than 1 in a 1000 each year. Stay off ladders and your risk is likely reduced even further.

There are other risks that are higher.

btw, We bought a car with side-curtain airbags to reduce the risk of an impact with the side of the car. Many cars have them.

It can also help to learn to move with purpose. We tend to move without thought. I have had to learn to move with a more deliberate purpose. For me, it is not to avoid a head contact. It is because, if I move too quickly, it tend to lose my balance and stumble.

You can redirect your OCD to this purpose. I used to do a lot of heavy lifting. I learned to stop before making any lift. I stopped hurting my back and became able to lift more weight safely.

Some time with an occupational therapist may help you learn some movement skills.

Eventually, you will be able to learn these skills and get on with your life and leave this anxiety behind.

Perhaps look at it from a "fixation" aspect, it could fit in with OCD also..
Address those fixation issues and you may be able to move forward.

You might benefit from exploring our sister site - Forums at Psych Central -
http://forums.psychcentral.com/

I feel much the same way as you. I am constantly doubting recent events, convincing myself that I hit my head. What I tell myself is "if you have to ask, you didn't hit your head." Just think about how upset you'd be if you hit your head considering all the trauma you've already been through. You'd be so damn sure of it, you wouldn't have to ask.

Good luck friend.