Out of desperation I found this group. I am a 52 year old busy busy escrow officer. While running late to a meeting, a fell running up some stairs. I must have missed a stair but I don't really know. I ended up flying like superman and landing directly on the underside of my chin. There were not any other bruises or bumps anywhere on my body. The underside of my chin bore the entire brunt of the fall. I landed on very hard ground (cement covered with a thin layer of industrial carpet). I was very bruised.

After feeling extremely dizzy, I went to my family doctor the next day and was diagnosed with a concussion. I had to go to a workers comp doctor. He did not believe that I had a concussion. He told me that since I did not lose consciousness, I did not suffer a concussion. I told him he was wrong and asked him if he watched the NFL to see fully conscious players leave the game with concussions. It was not a good relationship. I ended up being diagnosed with whiplash (my neck was curving the wrong way in my x-rays) and concussion symptoms. He wanted me to go back to work the next day, but I fought for the week off. The visit traumatized me. I knew he didn't believe me so I spent the next week reading like crazy trying to get ready to go to work. I answered emails from home. I did housework. I pushed through the exhaustion, headaches, dizziness, etc. because I knew he was going to make me go to work. Needless to say, when I saw him the next time I felt really really bad. The dizziness was horrible. I was feeling sick from it. The headaches were relentless. I was exhausted but couldn't sleep at night. I took my husband with me so he could see how this idiot acted. Once again, he didn't even care about my symptoms and told me that just because I was dizzy, didn't mean I couldn't work. Well I lost it, I told him off (this is so not like me) and walked out on him slamming the door. I left my poor husband there. I was furious and just couldn't take one more second of his voice. That was the first week of October.

My HR sent me to another clinic. These doctors were fantastic and completely understood and believed me. I have been off of work ever since. I misunderstood the whole resting thing for the majority of my recovery. I was resting for me, but not really resting. I had a headache all day (even at night) every day for 7 weeks. Finally one of the doctors expressed the resting in a way I could understand. My brain is a muscle and I was running around on my injured muscle. I got that and totally resting. Headaches went away. The dizziness lessened but never really went away. It mainly happens when I track right with my eyes. Lots of noise still bothers me. Bright lights bother me. Computer monitors bother me. I have trouble thinking deeply if that makes sense. I do figures all day long. Balance files. I couldn't do that yet. If I do too much, I get a headache.

I was released for full time work on Monday. I tried but it didn't go well. I had a horrible headache by the end of the day Monday. I went to sleep i tears. Tuesday was better. I left at 4:00 to avoid driving in the dark and at rush hour (I commute almost an hour each way). Wednesday I woke up with a headache but I went in. By the middle of the day I was dizzy. I left at 4:00 and came home and slept for two hours. The dizziness was still there when I woke up. Thursday was horrible. I was very dizzy from the second I got out of bed. I went to work but left early and was back at the doctor. Due to insurance issues, I need to be at work but I now I have been released for 2 hours a day. I am taking a few sick days and then I will try it again. The doctor wanted to send me in for all kinds of additional tests but I said no. I want to see how I do with a restricted schedule. I have researched PCS enough to know that it takes time to get better. If I can't handle 2 hours a day and feel this bad, then I will consider it, but honestly, I am in the workers comp system and I just don't want to deal with another doctor.

I am just so frustrated. I feel like a complete wimp. I am strong and athletic. I am used to working 11 hours days and problem solving all day long. I look fine and healed. My chin isn't bruised but is still tender in that one spot. I look normal (except yesterday where I looked pale), but I don't feel normal. I just don't fee like myself. I have dark circles under my eyes (I've never had that problem before). These symptoms seem to return if I do too much but doing too much seems to be so little to me right now. Will this ever get better? Does anyone understand what I am saying? I just want to know I'm not going crazy and to feel like I am not alone. Thanks for letting me write this. I am quite literally at the end of my rope on this and starting to feel depressed. Thanks again.

StillNotNormal,

Welcome to NeuroTalk.

First, What you are experiencing is completely normal after a concussion.

15% of concussions have prolonged recoveries. It sounds like you are part of that group.

The first WC doc had one thing right. You likely have whiplash, in addition to your concussion. But, loss of consciousness has no bearing on whether you suffered a concussion. He was ignorant about that. You were very fortunate to be referred to the new doctor. WC is a tough situation, especially with concussions. Regarding the whiplash, upper neck injuries are common with concussions. The joints above and below C-1 can get traumatized causing inflammation that interrupts blood flow and nerve transmission. If you are offered any diagnostics or treatment for your neck, it will be worth considering.

Regarding work, it will help if you can find a way to lower the stress level of your work. A slower pace at your desk will help. Plus, if you can minimize the sounds at/around your desk, it should help.

The drive to work starts you off with excessive stimulation. Commute traffic is far too stressful for someone with PCS. It might help if you can take a quiet break after you get to work to let your brain settle down from the drive. It will also help to take frequent breaks. Only 5 minutes in a quiet area every hour or so will be a good start.

I have more to say but will save it for later. It will help if you would read the Sticky at the top about Vitamins. Read the whole post. It has some helpful links at the bottom. The "You Look Great" YouTube video series sounds very applicable to your situation. It is long so don't expect to watch all 6 segments at once (about an hour total)

What testing and diagnostics did the doc want you to have ?

My best to you.

Thanks for responding Mark. I took a sick day today. I slept 10 hours last night and just woke up from a three hour nap. I guess going back to work full time was too much too soon.

I don't remember all the tests the doctor wanted to do. I had really been recovering well up until this week and knew that my job and the events that had transpired since Monday were the cause of my setback, not something deeply wrong with my brain. Driving in rush hour in one of the worse rainstorms CA has had in years didn't help. My computer monitors were messed up, one had gigantic font and the other tiny font. They couldn't figure out how to fix it for hours. They finally got it to work and it happened again. They changed out my monitors for two huge monitors with the brightness set at 100. No one could figure out how to lower the brightness. Stuff like that. It was almost a comedy of errors. After all the sleeping, I feel much better today. The dizziness is still there when I track with my eyes but it is 100% better than yesterday.

I went to that Youtube series you talked about and listened to it while on the couch, didn't watch. Parts 2, 3 and 5 resonated so much with me. I found myself talking out loud saying, "Oh my god, yes. Exactly." I cried during parts of it out of sheer relief that I wasn't alone in what was happening to me. It helped me a great deal.

I am going to take it easy through the weekend and see how I feel on Monday. I loved your suggestion about taking a break when I got to work from the drive. I have a team of assistants and will not be doing any figuring for a while. I will focus on the easier tasks when I start my two hour shifts. I often wonder if I will ever feel normal again. I want to see Star Wars. Will I ever be able to do that? Stuff like that.

My doctors seemed to think that I will fully recover. I do too, but it seems it will take longer then I ever imagined.

Still,

You aren't crazy or imagining things...this is a very different road for some of us.

Learn what sets you off and not just to rest but WHEN to rest is vital too.

Hang in there and don't let the doubt win.

Bud

If you want to fully recover, it will take a lot of discipline on your part. I've watched many on NT over the years struggle for a year or more trying to maintain a stressful daily activity level. They finally slowed down out of desperation and started doing better.

It will be very important to learn to moderate your life. You may find that a high stress life will create quite a roller coaster ride even after you are doing better.

There is a software called fLux that allows you to change the brightness and color temp of your display. It may give you better function that the display controls on the monitor.

You need to understand that just because you have a good day, it does not mean you can return to a intense effort. Those good days are your healing days. The more uninterrupted good days you have , the better you will recover. You can push too hard after a good day and lose all that you have gained. Unfortunately, concussion does not play fair. Just when you think you can enjoy a good day, it bites and says 'slow down.'

I hope you can find a way to that proper balance.

This is so true. I have fallen into the good day, I can go back to normal trap many times. I thought that if I just took breaks, I could return to full time but my heavens that was not the case. I felt so badly yesterday, just awful. I was so dizzy. After sleeping 10 hours last night and a three hour nap today, I feel much better. My poor brain was just crying out for me to stop. I will approach things differently now.

Thanks for the post on the software. I am going to look into that. The bright screens were a huge problem for me. This would be a big help.

Thanks for the support. I truly appreciate it. It's so nice to talk to people that understand.

StillNormal,
how did your plan with working for 2h/day go? any improvements?
did figure out any tricks that make computer work easier?
All the best!