It's early and dark outside, got up at 5am with the dogs, only one of my dogs wakes up early, then the other two are raring to go.

So, they went out, having their biscuits. I am sitting here having an iced coffee.

Today the Vet comes to the house to give them their shots. Then I have my MRI and Cat Scan at 3pm. I was supposed to go Monday, but I felt too sick.

Yesterday I went to the Dermo and got the injections in my scalp for alopecia, its just a little spot. Then I went and got a copy of the police report. Reading it made me very sad, yet it woke me up again to what an ***, manipulater he really is. Besides jealous and controlling.

Then I found out a very good friend passed away. He was young 35, 2 kids, so sad, I cried my eyes out. Then felt sick again in my stomach with a headache.

Just too much damn stress. I don't know how much more I can handle, it's been so stressful for almost a year with my mom, then all this with my idiot husband. I must have an ulcer. Besides the post concussion syndrome, now the sick stomach a lot.

I need a complete overhaul............................Well have a good day, think happy thoughts, feel good, and just hang in there and chill when you can. p.s. I hope maybe the tech doing the tests will tell me something today, I hate waiting for results. Hope my fusion is in tack and my brain is just bruised and nothing serious.

Hugs, Nikko

(((((((HUGS)))))))
bizi

then again i always seem to be late.

this is my hump day... i finally feel like i'm getting there. yesterday my mom came to help, and in the end i found out, she did a lot of work, but some i didn't know she did and viceversa and..... well she did two iccky jobs which were cleaning on top of the kitchen cabinets and cleaning the outdoor storage thing which is not that bad if you have one of those lil' broom swishies.

what did i do? i had anxiety attacks almost in succession in one case the lorazepam didn't help i can't remember if i took two or if i just continued to breathe almost asthmatically. ;ast night i took some Z i got when we hauled over yet MORE stuff (but not the last) to my parents. it didn't seem to be making me sleepy within reasonable time so i took another. i was in bed at least when it knocked it me out cold right through a bleepybleepy message from my cellphone and an alarm.

i woke up when my dad called, in the afternoon at about 4.30 -14 hours sleep. my dad asked if the landlord had come yet and i said no that's 5.30, good thing you called i need to get ready i asked myself if i felt better. no. i did not. cleared the couch and dressed, the landlord came and went with the wall-painting guy.
..........
the rest of the story at 11 (actually 1or2ish more likel) but now ... i shall call my parents...

you can do this...you are doing this....
(((HUGS)))
bizi

then again i'm always late

the rest of the story...

while the landlord was here with the wall/painter guy they ended up looking at all the little spots, and i pointed out one where i had moved the couch to. after they left i started cleaning, even did another of the hard jobs.

later it all dawned on me. i didn't think i felt better, when i woke up. but i was (physical issues aside). not at all uptight when they came for the painting thing, went ahead with the cleaning till some muscles in my legs said STOP. it was like, no big deal!

so i had planned for today to get up early haul some of what's left (which is a lot, because i decided to hold onto the computer, phone, modem... sigh) come back, defrost fridge, and do the floor, then call the landlord. sounds great huh?

no Z, nor sleep stuff coz i was tired anyway. i went to bed early (for me) i.e. about 3 am, set the alarm for 9.30 and slept right through it oops. so, now it's 1 pm and my plans must be re-planned. today however, i am feeling that stuckness... not wanting to go... every task which remains to be done is something that like, keeps me here, weird huh. this happened to me in California too...

Bizi - when i moved here from CA i stayed with my parents, same conditions, so i know what i'm headed for.

well, i am much closer now. my mom says don't bring any food but i can't get myself to throw away a full bottle of ketchup and i don't think it's really kosher here to ask ppl if they want opened products. so there's that too. so i've decided i'm going to bring the food and take the heat from my mother. my father will be on my side anyway, heh heh.

so, it seems the Z did something. well, now to get something to eat and COFFFEEEEE. (gas is off, electric hotpot is gone).