I have been struggling with bipolar for years and with severe side effects for the past 6 years from 18 ECT's.
I cannot find any support groups in my area. (my therapist is looking too) so I thought I would try this to see if I can find some people I can relate to online.
I have never met anyone that is bipolar nor anyone that has had ECT's before so I feel a bit lost.
Can anyone help?

there is a new member who has ect treatments currently so she will respond to you.
We will be a support for you.
tell us about yourself and you can read here, pull up a chair.
welcome.
bizi

6 years ago i went through a series of 18 ECT's because after years of various meds, nothing was working...i was suicidal and my family felt desperate to help me. after the treatments i have lost a majority of my long term memory and short term has cause many daily challenges. basically, i am trying to re-invent myself because i don't remember much about who i was before the treatments.
i am challenged with finding the strength to exist daily but find the energy on my 'good' days to manage my relationship with a husband who is not married to the same woman he asked to marry him 10 years ago (great man)& mother a 16 year old son (great kid) when all i want to do is crawl up in a ball and fly away. my short term memory causes issues with our daily interactions.
i stay strong for them...the problem is i need to want to be strong for ME. I get all that....got the handbook...however applying what I need to do is a whole different story.
i am trying to re-define myself. What do i like to do? how do i stop feeling guilty for putting my family through this with me. when will i accept these changes as not my fault, accepting bipolar and become a productive citizen who has friends, hobbies and lives her life? (sorry so long)

hi
and thank you for posting back a sharing a bit of your circumstances.
I hope that you have a good pdoc and a therapist to work with you?
Do you have any girl friends who have hung around thru all of this?
Are you still suicidal?
bizi

Hello! I'm a fellow bipolar. I've never had ECT, although the last time I was hospitalized, a nurse suggested that I try it. (I've been through a slew of anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, and anti-seizure meds, as well as what they call "stabilizing drugs.") One thing that did concern me was the stories of memory problems....

Alas, though, I developed memory problems from all the meds the psychiatrists have put me on. I finally had to give up my teaching career as a psychology professor (yes, of all things), and go on disability. I would lose my train of thought when trying to lecture, and so on. Sigh.

I was diagnosed with bipolar ten years ago. I am now a "stay-at-home" mom, you might call it--and I've been struggling with my loss of a job, an "identity." Believe it or not, my husband was also diagnosed with bipolar a few years ago. He's on disability, too. We do what we can to survive. We're both in therapy.

We have two sons--and we put both of them in therapy, realizing that their having two bipolar parents wouldn't give them an ideal life. They're doing okay, I think.

Hi Darcy

welcome to the board! thank you for sharing.

we have a poster here who joined recently and was interested in mutual support regarding ECT.... her name is Debbie and her userid here is justired.

here is the link to her most recent thread in this forum:
Does it ever get any better?

nice to meet you and i hope we can help you... we can listen at least.

i know acceptance is hard, very hard. i am still very much learning it... sigh.

~ waves ~

I just wanted to tell you
THAT IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!!
please be kind to yourself.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

Welcome

And Bizi is so right "Its not your fault." Its technically not anyones fault.

I personally think anyone that has to put up with it has a brave sould.

I am the mother of kids with problems.

I like to think I am working to learn how to help all people.

I too love to listen, and this is a great room for people that need to talk.

We will be here if and when you need us.

Also look for Nami support groups.

Donna

Thank you so much for those of you that have already responded.
Just this bit of reinforcement really helps.

Yes, you can call me Darcy.
I am not suicidal anymore. Mostly because I could never leave my son behind.
I have a wonderful psych doc and a new therapist that seems to 'get' me.
Right now i am feeling so fortunate to have a supportive husband and son and at the same time, feel sorry that I have put them through so much. I feel sorry to my husband that I am not more productive, motivated or able to move forward. I think my therapist and I figured out that it is not my husband who I am saying sorry to but to me. I have not mourned the loss of my previous self nor have I forgiven myself. (even though its for something that isn't under my control)