Dear Mari

i am generally afraid of being yelled at, for any reason whatsoever... anything seems good. going to ER, not going to ER, taking benzo, waiting too long... knowing too much, knowing too little... wearing a blue shirt, whatever.

i just have a general, overall fear, based on past bad experiences with doctors yelling at me.

i think i found the source of confusion. the following is ambiguous:
the event occurred on the 4th of this month. i only saw mdoc last night. i was not told to go to ER at this point (too late). he said i should have immediately when i had the event. so no, this is not about being told to do something and not doing it. i did the only thing i was told (lorazepam test). only to hear i should have done what i was scoffed at for suggesting in the past.

well let's hope. that is how it should be but i was close to thrown out of a neuro's office before and she did yell - which is owwwie to the nth power when one is having a migraine.

i am trying to keep a positive attitude for this one. that was one doc, after all. i have been to other docs who were nice.

cardio is in the city, seriously doubt he knows mdoc or anything about him. i am still trying to figure out how to tell him, without implying offense to the entire "doctor class," that my doctor never examined me, not even last year when it "wasn't necessary."

yes. that is the important part. let's hope, eh? if he does though i will probably be a puddle on the floor in seconds.

thanks! can use them about now!!! (((backatcha))) too.

~ waves ~

Dear Waves,

Docs should be nicer. They are in a caring profession for crying out loud.

When I wrote last night I was thinking of the cardio that mdco sent me to last year for a serious of tests when she was going through her "let's test for everything" phase.
That cardio was the gentlest doc I'd ever met. I was so happy about him because I have had docs yet at me.

I write this today hoping that by now you have started on your city journey.
One a female GP yelled because i was taking notes. She said that I was not listening to her. I had a not nice / nutcase neuro who was a jerk when I was hospitalized for four days. In the follow up office visit he yelled at me although he did calm down and perform an office exam that seemed thorough. He seemed surprised that I cried about the yelling.

Once, a huge big shot in infectious disease treat me dismissively by asking if I had eaten cheese from over seas. I kind of yelled at him. This was almost 20 years ago when I was much younger. I tore off my gown (naked now in front of him), put my clothes on and ran from the office. I told the young person at the desk I was leaving and came home to call and let my insurance company know that the office visit with that guy did not go well.

Oh and I had one mdoc who was at a clinic group with other mdocs. He looked at my chart in the hall before he saw me. He walked into the office excitably yelling about something. I knew he was the problem and not me so I was not concerned . . . . .eventually he explained that he was reacting because as a person on Verapamil I should be going to the office regularly.
I had to explain that I was seeing a psychiatrist for the Verapamil. He calmed down.

Those are the highlights of my bad doc stories. I probably have a few others that I have lost from my memory. I am in deep love love with my current mdoc -- she is fabulous. I make hubby see her too although we go independently.

I do understand concern about agitated docs. Last night when I wrote I was hoping that you would be treated by a gifted and lovely doc.

I hope your visit went ok. Give us an update. I did not sleep much last night but I took off the day from work. I can read calmly today.
M

Dear waves, I am a bit behind so will try to catch up....
you more than likely have been to your exam. I hope you were treated kindly and with out judgement.
I am glad that your mother would be there someone is better than no one when you are waiting.
They may order a stress test for you or have you wear a holter monitor for a day or so to see if there are any anomalies, which just gets in the way.
I am hoping that you like him/her.
AND I HOPE THEY DID NOT YELL AT YOU.
((((((HUGS))))))
bizi

thanks Bizi and Mari.

Mari... so sorry for all your bad doc experiences.

dealing with the clinic bureaucracy was perhaps the most stressful part after all. and mom stressed me out a bit although - as i said, i am grateful for her escorting me there as i was already uptight enough i would have got more uptight and probably lost.

the cardio was nice. from the few glimpses i got of her before my turn, she seemed a little brusque but she was not at all. she did keep a pace but did not rush me or interrupt me. i tried REAL HARD not to get too longwinded. i told her my mdoc never even examined me or took my pulse, and said i didn't need to go to ER the first incident.

she messed up writing down a couple of things on the amnestic part of her report - one a drug name that i am taking which is very similar to another but it isn't a biggie. the other thing was a description of symptom but it was from an old episode so again less important. i think may have confused her by telling her what it was not like. it is hard to get a lot of info out in a short time. and i need to remember to avoid talking about how things are not! overall she did pretty well summarizing what happened. i could have pre-empted the errors too. i had made a nice organized list of sx, meds, other info, and planned to show her the notes, but i didn't get around to printing them!

also she did her report on the computer which means - it's legible to humans!!!

EKG was normal but she said the symptoms still deserved further investigation and ordered
- an echodoppler?
- an EKG w/ halter
- stress test on treadmill
- followup visit
all are booked and the stress test is combined with my followup visit. i will have the results of the other two tests before then.

she also asked about my bp and i told her it has increased to borderline range in recent years, my diastolic is especially consistent. she said taht could also be causing some problems. her reading was 140/95 and i was very relaxed after the EKG. she wants me to keep a bp diary as well and bring that in next time. she says that could be the problem.

i am soooooo glad she didn't yell at me. indeed she was very cordial (no pun intended ).

~ waves ~

Dear Waves,

That was one big step toward getting answers / treatment.

The mdoc was decent and thorough thank goodness. How will you travel the next time? Will you have someone with you again?

Making the list -- even if you did leave it behind -- was productive. It helped you have ready in your head what you needed to tell the cardio.

Is it ok that I laughed when I read this? . . . also about your telling her what is NOT going on? Well, better to tell the doc too much than not enough . . . . more info is better than less for getting good care. I've seen studies that show that articulate folks get better care than quiet folks do.

Sending you lots of hugs. . .. wondering why anything at all that occurred in that office could be called an "error." Everything you did was exactly as it should be. If there were an error or two, they were recoverable. You were not in a high stakes Olympic trial. Even then Pole Vaulters get three jumps, swimmers have more than one heat (and usually more than one event, . . . ).


Keep taking care.

M