Sending you some hugs.

Donna

I am sorry that you are so stressed.
wish I could lift that a bit for you.
(((((HUGS))))))
bizi

... it has calming properties, used in aromatherapy as well as brewed as a tea.

but i also think it is just amazingly beautiful... and since i can't send you the scent, i am sending you a pic:



at my last job, there was some planted as part of the main office landscaping. i only passed it on my way there and home... walking to/from bus stop. i would sometimes nip a single sprig off and take whiffs from it from time to time. it made the walk more soothing, especially at the end of the day when my nerves were in pieces.

'sending soothing lavender thoughts to you, dear Mari. I hope you feel better soon.



~ waves ~

This and you are beautiful this morning. thanks for sharing.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

Dear Di,

Thank you.

Yes. That sounds about right. When I was younger I was able to pull him back a little toward the adult world. I think I don't care anymore. Or maybe he has changed too . . . has become so that he reacts the same way he did when he was stressed as a child.

Generators are a hassle. They need upkeep through out the year. Most of them can't just be put a way for a long time and then come on. That's what I heard. . . . glad you have lots of lots and batteries.

Hubby bought some rechargeable flashlights. When I was single I used up one and then a second and never got that last one replaced. I love that these flashlights turn on automatically after the power goes out. The flashlight is supposed to be good for 45 mins to an hour.

M

Dear Waves,

That is beautiful. Thanks for the lovely lavender.
What else is calming? I have a good brand of peppermint tea I make at work with hot water from the microwave. Are there alternatives to lavender and chamomile? Maybe ginger?


Dear Waves and Bizi,
I'm not sleeping. That is the gist. That is the whole of it. I need more sleep.
Saturday, I went to the mall and got subtle highlights in my hair . . . then charged some earrings and a new watch and wallet. I was tired of my old watch and the wallet had fallen apart. Plus the wallet had gotten water under the glass after I was washingmy hands at work. (I can pay the credit card off in January.)


(I remember reading a scientist suggesting that it is good to wash your hands with your watch on because the watch needs to get washed too. . . . well I suppose it depends on how water resistant the watch is.)


Then I made four errand stops on the way home. Today felt like a quiet day. . .. . maybe because I watched no tv. I did talk to my mom and dad and then my sis briefly on the phone.

Hubby appreciated the groceries I brought home. (We both shop. He cooks.)
Maybe I should continue not watching tv and limiting computer work time.

M

Hi,
One of the many problems with not sleeping is I start to see things.
Or, and I am not making sense.. . . .sometimes I feel things as if they are a fraction of a second from showing up.

The other night I saw a face I did not recognize after I closed my eyes but was still awake. My old pdoc explained several ways that this could happen. The one I remember is that I apparently go into a dream state before I am asleep. I am sure I remember that right.. . that he said it that way.

I did not 100% believe him of course because that is not what feels like is happening.

Those sleep paralysis moments you mentioned in another post somewhere Waves are the scariest things in the world when you do not know what is going on. I have not had that in years thank goodness. Around the time I get my meds straight, those events stopped happening.

Right now I feel people. I have to keep them at bay.

We are supposed to have sunshine tomorrow. I will go for a walk with the sun and trees and build up some CHI.

M

how unsettling. i would turn on the lights immediately. sleep deprivation is an awful awful thing. it makes everything much worse. I forgot. what medications are you on right now?
fondly
bobby

I bet your hair looks pretty. last night I had a dream that I let my hair go gray and that It was half gray half brown it was hideous. Wonder when/if I will ever let it go gray? I like my dark blood red hair so much it is worth the expense of keeping it up. It costs $30 plus tip at our local aveda beauty school. They stopped tinting eye brows along with the color due to risk of eye involement. Now you have to have them tinted by an estician another visit and more time/money which I am not commited to another 45 minutes. So they will be grayish until I can't stand them anymore.

Dear Mari, I wish and wish you could get more sleep. That is my wish for you, end of story.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

Dear Bobby,
That is why I used to keep the lights on 24 hours a day. When I got married, I had to learn how to sleep with the light off in the bedroom because hubby needed the lights off to sleep.

I take
~Verapamil -- helps with depression and anxiety
~Klonopin
~A tiny dose of Gabapentin -- seems to help with depression and anxiety but has tremendous brain fog


M