Kay, :Heart:

That stinks.
I suppose that you are sleeping.
(So much work to take care of our selves)

Maybe the pdoc called you and reassured you.


Give us an update.

M

oh kay, am so sorry.
you are working to take good care of yourself...we are human.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

I felt a lot worse than last time… maybe it's because I took all of the am pills too. I waited 45 minutes for someone in pdoc's office to call back, and then I called poison control. They told me to go to the ER and I went by cab.

They took blood and urine and pretty much just monitored me. Because of my history I had to convince the ER doc it wasn't intentional. Since they were just watching me I asked if I could go home once my labs came back fine, and they said let me. I was there for about 4 1/2 hrs.

Both poison control and the ER doc made it a point to say that they'd never heard of anyone on such a high dose of seroquel and the ER doc commented on all the other meds I take. I'm acutely aware of just how much **** I have to take everyday. Comments like that just make me feel crazy. I wish I was only on 100mg of seroquel… if I screwed up a 100mg dose I wouldn't have felt as crummy as I did or have had to go to the hospital.

Anyway, I went to bed early last night and I feel okay this morning. Fortunately the ER doc believed my OD was accidental so I'm sitting at the computer with Buddy in my lap while smoking cigarettes and drinking coffee, instead of waking up in a psych ward with a nicotine patch and a cup of cafeteria decaf (cat-less).

Kay,

You caught my attention with the nicotine patch! And no cafeeine?
Is that what they do now to people in the wards -- take away their ciggies! Yikes. That makes the "time" less bearable!

When I was in at a point in the 90s the folks got smoking breaks.


--
Anyway, I am really glad that you got out of there and spent the night in your own bed. And have your cats with you.

M

Oh kay, am sorry that happened. glad you are ok. and yes very happy they believed you.. glad that you have your sweet kitty to love and that he/she is a lap kitty.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi
just to let you know, I believe poison control people will call you today to check up on you to make sure you are ok.

I woke up feeling okay, but I got caught up in the seroquel hangover yesterday and I felt off for the rest of the day. Everything felt surreal and I was dragging ***.

I don't think poison control will call me back. When I called there was a ton of noise in the background (people having fun) and I could barely hear the girl. I don't remember if she took my info or not and she was a little rude.

I really don't remember much about my first time in the psych ward because I was so far gone… I lost about two weeks, but I can't imagine I was a happy camper without my cigarettes. When I went in for 11 days at the end of July for agitated mania it was brutal not having my butts because my psychomotor agitation was so bad I had been smoking 3-4 packs a day. They put 2 patches on me! I had nothing to do with my hands, so I kept playing with my chapstick. And I had to be on decaf at first to "reduce stimulation."

I spoke to my counselor yesterday. I guess one of the things drunk.org wants me to do is to show I've attended AA or another alcohol support group meeting, and I have to do it before I can complete the counseling and "treaty". Finding out 24 hours beforehand is less than convenient. There were meetings at 12 and 2pm yesterday but I had a GYN appointment at 1pm. There are appointments at the same time today, but my appointment with the counselor is from 11-12pm. Hopefully I can go to the 2pm meeting today and have the person running it sign off for me and I can get it to her afterwards… I can't see her objecting to that… Although mailing it to her rather than hand delivering it would save me $30. Going to the 12pm meeting tomorrow would be even better… I've had a lot of excitement lately.

My GYN was very understanding about not changing my birth control despite the cysts because of my bp. She really got my "If it ain't broke, don't fix it," mentality and didn't push me an inch. If anything suspicious turns up on the PAP this time, I'm going to forgo further testing and just have the abnormal tissue removed outpatient, but she said everything looks good to her. I should have my results within a week. I'm still not going to freak out. I'm getting it taken care of early. My mother ignored the issue so it progressed to cervical cancer, and she had to have a hysterectomy.

After my appointment, I had the cab drop me off at the leasing office and I walked back to my apartment. I am so deconditioned! I was doing a good job of taking care of my body in the fall, but I guess I just gave up on that. I need to start getting on the exercise bike more often (even if it hurts), and I need to get out of this apartment more. I guess I'll make a weekly round trip to the leasing office to put money on the laundry card a goal. I'm about 15lbs heavier than I want to be, but this isn't about weight. My gait is off and I have like zero endurance. It's so bad I may have to go back to pool therapy PT… we'll see what I can do on my own.

This has been one hello of a year for you. please don't beat yourself up over any of it. Have you ever been to AA meetings before?
I would suggest you go to SMART recovery. They have meetings on line that count just like AA meetings but not any religious over tones. But they were having computer problems yesterday, I will check today.
bizi
I just checked, the site is still down unfortunately....

http://www.smartrecovery.org/community/#.VuF3k-aws_g

Thank you Bizi :hug:

I have been to AA meetings before. I went to 2 a day once they let me out of isolation the last time I was in the hospital, and I went to a couple in the past. I've had a pretty good experience on the whole, but I've been to two really bad meetings. I don't have a problem with AA, but I have a problem with the people who really live and breathe it, and shove it down everyone else's throat.

My counselor said I didn't have to rush to show her proof I attended an AA meeting- I could bring the note to our final appointment next Thursday. But the cab came quickly, we got an early start, and finished up in time for me to go directly a noon AA meeting at a nearby church.
There were about 20 people there and they were very nice. They were mostly elderly people, mostly men, but some women too. There were two obvious holy-rollers in the group, and one sat right next to me. He told me I wasn't seven months sober, I was "only sober today," and spewed a bunch of twisted AA and religious BS at me. I could have smacked him.

I wasn't given a form to have the leader of the meeting sign. I took a slip of paper and wrote that I attended the name of the aa meeting at "X church in X city" on march 10th from 12-1pm and the guy signed his name below. It was illegible, so I asked his wife to print it below the signature for me. I'm going to call and ask my counselor if that's enough. I don't want to find out that it's not acceptable at the last appointment.

Compared to my stories and those of the people in the psych ward, the stories I heard yesterday were very vanilla. I'd love to have coffee with those nice people again, but I could never speak there. My cab driver (who"s been driving me around for a year now) was happy I chose not to go to the AA meeting at the shelter because he was concerned for my safety, but I honestly think that I would feel much more comfortable discussing my alcoholism there. My counselor suggested I find a dual-diagnosis group. I have the meeting list for my area. I haven't gone through the whole book, but I haven't found one that's obvious.

I'm very isolated. It would be nice to meet new people, especially sober people. So, I can see myself going to more AA meetings once I get my license back, but it's important to find a meeting that's the right fit. Fortunately there are quite a few meetings in my area to choose from. I'm not looking to get heavily involved in AA though. That's just not for me.

While looking for dual diagnosis AA meetings online, I found an organization called Dual Recovery Anonymous (DRA). It's based on AA, but there's obviously an emphasis on managing psychiatric illnesses too. There are meetings four days a week in my city. I am definitely interested in going.

that is awesome kay!
bizi