[Mari]

Kay,

Good news about the coat and your weight loss plan.

I hope that the bug thing gets worked out satisfactorily and soon.


M

[OhKay]

I haven't seen any bugs for the last 2 mornings despite the bait the pest control guys put out. I didn't see any for a several weeks after their last visit though. If they decide to do a walk through, management will send a notice to all residents soon.

I cleaned the carpet in my living room yesterday. It was brutal. It looks better, but I didn't get the results I would have liked. Part of that is because the machine is a cheap P.O.S.

I measured my mood. This wasn't a manic thing, it was an "I'm sick and tired of this" thing. I did it because I was tired of waiting for my husband to do it. I should not be steam cleaning carpets, but I'm tired of vacuuming the rug and having it still look so ****ing filthy.

There are a lot of things that I would like my husband to do, that I've been waiting for him to do, that he should do…
I just got rid of all that **** that was hanging around in the kitchen because I took the incentive, but now he's decided to throw out a tower fan, so that will probably sit in there for a couple of weeks until he takes it to the dumpster.

My weight this morning was 154.4lb, so I decided to try on the size 10 jeans. They fit like a glove I'm glad that I didn't try them on any earlier though because I would have been discouraged had they not fit.

I have to go food shopping today. God, I hate it.
Last week I think I went too far to accommodate my husband and ended up making 2 separate meals too often during the week. Right now, my list is a mess because I need to come up with a meal plan that makes sense. It will take me a while.

[bizi]

congratulations on the size 10!!!!!!!

[Dmom3005]

Congrats on size 10.

Donna

[mymorgy]

I am worried

[OhKay]

My husband says the carpet looks a lot better. I think I'm just expecting too much after all the energy I put into it. I'm still very sore.

He took the fan out to the dumpster this morning without being asked!!! I will definitely be thanking him when he gets home from work.

I had to start a new shopping list with just the non-meal related items because my old list was a mess. I made an entirely new meal plan where I'll only be making separate meals on two nights, and when I do, it will be easy on me. My husband will be home an extra day because of the holiday, so I bought a few extra things to account for that.
For once I picked a good day and time to shop. The store wasn't a zoo, and I had no problem aside from a woman on a cellphone who wasn't paying attention almost rammed me with her basket. I had such good luck, when I got home my husband was there to help me with the bags

I see my pdoc today. The lithium has definitely helped, but there is still room for improvement. I'd like her to increase the lithium a little. I think she probably will. Hopefully help in the depression department will also translate to help in the anxiety department.

[bizi]

Glad that your hubby helped you....
I hope that you have a restful and relaxing weekend.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

[OhKay]

My view from the desk was obstructed, and unfortunately my husband never took the fan out. It's still in the corner in the kitchen.

I complained about my legs hurting and acting up because all of the activity lately (shampooing carpet, grocery shopping, running a lot of errands and doing laundry yesterday), and my husband said it wasn't like I "had worked all day and driven 200 miles." He's saying things like this a lot lately. I don't work because I can't, and told him that. I told him I know he's suffering lately, and I do my best to help him, but in my experience I've learned that all I can do for him is listen. I have been there to do that for him, but he forgets that I have problems too, even though they are different, and I don't burden him with them. I try like hell not to ask him for help.

I felt like the conversation was unfinished… like I had a million more things to say, but I didn't want to get into a fight. His view of reality is so slanted, that it's almost pointless to bother anyway.


I saw my pdoc yesterday and she increased my lithium from 300mg once a day to twice a day. My level was very low when it was drawn last time, so I'm not worried about toxicity. I have some worries about acne, but I'm mainly concerned that the increase will effect my vision. She talked about possibly increasing it to 900mg if I need it. It's only half of my old dose, but I don't know if I would go that high because of the increased risk of s/e.

We talked about my anxiety, and I told her I was still using higher doses of the klonopin, which is okay with her since I need it. I told her that my husband's anxiety and temper were an issue. She asked me where the relationship was headed (a nice, non-confrontational way of asking if I would leave him), and I told her things were staying as is.

I'll have to cook, but otherwise, I am doing nothing today.

[bizi]

You will have to keep an eye out for your acne......
You have been working hard, over extending yourself. please rest this weekend.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi