I can't stand to see Doug like I saw him for the past couple of hours. I called his hospice place twice. If doug is like me when he's hurting bad he just wants to be left alone. He did mumble thank you but that was the only coherent thing he said. I held his hand for awhile. His step-son is there now with Doug.

befuddled2

It's really tough...towards the end I was praying for Sharon and Eileen's death...I found it impossible to cope with somebody's suffering....I am so glad you were able to hold his hand. One night Sharon was hemorraging(sp) and she didn't call me...I found that so upsetting that she was alone and she didn't want to disturb me. When I found out, I gave her a good talking to...and said what are friends for.
When he is feeling better, ask him maybe if it comforts him for you to be there for him....that might also relieve your pain.
Bobby

I wish I had something more to offer then a cyber hug BF. I'm so sorry he's suffering so much.

BF,
I am so sorry that you are hurting and Doug has so much pain. I hope by now the hospice had gotten there or he goes to the ER. I know that is the last place he would want to be, but there at least he will have pain management.

I am saying prayers for you all.
I am glad he had your caring heart there. I bet that made hime feel happy inside even though he had the pain.

Hang in there, I am sending as much cyber support I can,
love
Di

Thanks everyone.

Doug's hospice nurse came about 3 hours ago and I just got off the phone with her again. Doug has a temperature of 104 and I hope he feels better tomorrow. I will make one more check on him in an hour and then try to get some sleep.

befuddleded2

((((((Barbara)))))),



See if you can get this book either from your local library or from Amazon: Accepting Your Power to Heal: The Personal Practice of Therapeutic Touch by Dolores Krieger

My Brother used this on my Mom when I had her home in hospice care. It didn't take me long at all to learn how to do it. It brought her unbelievable comfort and pain-relief.

My son had an infected mosquito bite on his shoulder. I did the Touch on it just before he went to bed. When he woke up the next morning, it was GONE. No scar, no redness, no indication that he had ever had the mosquito bite.

To get a small idea of what it feels like, rub your hands together for about 10 seconds. Then separate the palms -- put them as close together as you can without touching. You should feel warmth and tingling. It transfers healing and love and caring to the other person, as long as you're calm.

I'm sorry that Doug is hurting. If you can learn The Therapeutic Touch, that's something that you can do for him that will really help him and it can be done when you're both quiet. You can even do it when he's asleep.

Remember, Barbara, that healing and caring and loving is being given to you by all of us. Whenever you start to feel overwhelmed, just stop and take some nice deep breaths and feel our support surrounding you and holding you up.

Bless you, Barbara. I'm so glad that The Universe found you to help Doug.

Barb

Thanks Barb, I just ordered the book. I am thinking about going to sit with Doug till morning while his roommate sleeps. I just do not know if I can make it. His roommate stays up late and sleeps till noon or 1:00. That's a long time for Doug not to have someone look after him.

barbara

((((((Barbara)))))),

Honey, do what you CAN do. This is probably the hardest thing that you'll ever have to go through.

There is no perfection. There is no right or wrong.

There is only love and caring and doing what you're able to do. You have to take care of your SELF, too, so that you'll have the strength to do this.

Doug will start losing track of time now. So ... he won't really be aware of the times that you're not there. What he WILL remember is the times that you ARE there. And he'll remember the LOVE and the CARING.

Always remember that we're sharing our strength and our love and our caring with you. There's always MORE when you need it.



Barb

I wish I knew what to say. You are a very special caring person and Doug is lucky to have you. Stay strong for yourself and him.

I hope today he is feeling better.

Sending you an angel to watch over you both and lots of hugs.

Nikko

Thank you Barb and Nikko,

Doug is doing better today but then like his nurse said, it might get worse tonight. Doug spilt coke all over his bed spread so I have it in the washer now washing.

befuddled2