Thank you for clearing up things for me. I'm glad that I won't lose a ton of things that I talked about year by year. A lot of things have happened since 2007. It's like a journal that I can review. BF

Thank you Jomar. Thank you Donna. Thank you for the goodness from everyone. BF

I am glad that you made it over there!The check in thread at the top of the topics usually most popular thread it is on #75 It used to be so busy I could not keep up with it. now things have slowed down Don't know why????
bizi

There is a person where I live who has a tremendous ego, he's controling, he's simmering with anger, and he exploded with anger and I tried to get to my room, and he stepped in front of me three times. When I got to my room he said something that caused me to open my door. Then he put his foot in my door and I tried to remove his foot and he said if I hurt it he was going to( I don't remember the threat word) harm me. It's a hud house. I never thought that I'd be bullied at my age. The leadership of the house, a mental health orginization to which we pay rent is not handling the situation well. The person (bullie) is brilliant and always gets the upperhand. BF

Hi Friend,
I remember you had problems last year. I take it this is the same person who is threatening you. At that time you said this person was a friend of someone who manages the house, or something similar. I remember someone suggested Adult protective services or a name something like that. I don't live in your country so don't know who you would talk to about this living arrangement problem. Maybe you could contact your social worker if you have one or contact whoever set you up in the house in the first place.

It sounds shocking and I'm sorry you're having to deal with this person threatening you all the time. It's not right. This episode that you've described sounds violent and it must be causing you a lot of anxiety.



P.S. I found your last thread where it was happening and the others gave some great suggestions. It appears the person settled down and you ended up not having to contact anyone, but I'm not sure. Just my personal opinion but instead of waiting for it to happen again in a few months time over and over, you might be better addressing the problem now rather than later.

Put it in writing to the department/office or whoever it is that you pay the rent to and not just as verbal on the phone or in person.

Troubling times for me.

Thank you Lara. Yes. This is the same guy. I truely don't believe the staff or anyone else wants to deal with the person in question. I've never come across anyone in my life like him. He is so intimidating to everyone. What ever personality disorder he has is grandious. He is also brilliant in intelligence, and knows how to keep himself out of trouble. If he hits me I can definitely call the police,but I don't want it to come to that. I know that he must be hurting and in pain from things in the past. How to get him help without getting him in trouble is the question. I am hurting from the insults during his temper tantrums. He doesn't show any signs of empathy, compassion, or remorse. He hurts me in a.place where I'm suppose to be safe. He is always talking to the Lady in the system in charge of the house. I think he's lying about me behind my back because of something that he said to me when he was angry. Sooner or later this activity will catch up to him. BF

Dr Wes Carter goes into great detail about narcissist personality disorder on Youtube. I think that this is what my housemates has. BF

I'm using my tablet to post and it shut down in the middle of my post a little while ago so I'm going to make my posts brief for a while. BF

People like that need to be in control. The more they see a person as vulnerable, the more they will try to control situations and they are extremely self involved. Personally I think that people like this tend to be predatory and latch on to those that they see as "weak" or easy "targets" because they can see the target has a vulnerability or a gentle nature. I sadly was once married to someone who was a narcissist although they were not violent at all thankfully. There are many different forms of control though. My State just passed new laws regarding what is called Coercive Control. It is now criminalised.

Friend, this person who has treatened you on multiple occasions needs to be reported and please keep everything that has happened in writing. Having an illness or condition does not give someone the right to abuse you or control your movements in your own home.

Hi Brokenfriend,
I happened to notice this thread and hope you won't mind some input from somebody who would be hanging out in the MS forum if it was still active.

I saw that you live in a HUD building and wanted to mention that I live in a HUD building too. In fact I've lived in HUD buildings since 1983--first in one state, then in another.

I'm aware of how things go in HUD buildings. They're under some kind of obligation to provide "community space" for people to gather, watch TV, play cards, do puzzles, have meetings, even reserve space for private parties.

I've seen bad situations happen so many times I think they must be unavoidable. A clique establishes itself, and often there are bullies who may or may not be part of the clique.

The bullies get away with outrageous behavior--shouting abusive language nonstop at another tenant, physically blocking a neighbor from using the laundry room, etc.

Time and time again the management has been approached for help with these situations, and the response is always the same. We are told that the management is there to manage the office and maintain the building. They absolutely will not talk about other tenants to tenants. They will not get involved in any disputes between tenants.

If a tenant can demonstrate that he/she has already tried to settle the problem with the person, an "incident report" can be filed with the office. This has been tried, and the report gets sent to the main office of the management company, and someone probably calls the tenant who filed the complaint and discusses the issue.

I've never heard of anything real ever resulting from those incident reports. Maybe people have actually been thrown out of the building because of an incident report and I didn't know about it though. That is quite possible as nobody ever knows for sure if someone who is leaving is being evicted. They usually don't spread the news around if they're being evicted, of course.

What I'm saying is that there are steps that can be taken to resolve your problem with a bullying neighbor but many people wouldn't want to bother with taking those steps. I think you should try though.

I realize that building managers can't be police and can't be rapping people's knuckles for their bad manners, but we're talking about repeated bullying here. What you describe sounds as if someone has been repeatedly physically trying to block your access to the space you've rented. It's probably grounds for evicting the bully.

Is there legal aid in your area? Often bringing a lawyer into the picture can focus the attention of people who've been ignoring you up till then.