The good news is that Dirk and I had a long long talk about everything, and decided to give it another try. Everyone makes mistakes, God knows I have, so things are much better and he knows exactly how I feel.

Mom is drinking, depresssed and wants to die, yet she is not suicidle. She is refusing her meds now.

Dirk and I are supposed to go away Sat. night to Tombstone, wanted to get some Xmas gifts there, have dinner, stay overnight and come back Sun.

With the way my mother is now, that is shot. She pee'd the bed more than once this week, it's 8am and she is drunk. She has a DR's appt tomorrow and at this point, I doubt she will go. One never knows around here. I have found her on the floor in here bedroom, yelling for me. She says she has nothing to look forward to and nothing to do. Well, I have been through that too, with all the options and resources for her. Besides taking her out myself. So, I give up.

I can't go away for one day and night, and trust her to take care of herself and the pets. I sometimes think she does this, so I won't go and leave for one night, why? I don't know.

Plus, my PC is on the blink, a few minor problems, so I need to bring it in to be cleaned up and checked out.

I gave up on stopping her from drinking, it doesn't work, if one wants to drink they will and they will get it anyway they can.

Ok, enough of me venting....thanks for listening.

Nikko

Oh honey. Many multitudes of hugs. There isn't an icon big enough.

You are right. She will only stop drinking if she wants to. You are not responsible for her actions.

And she probably does not want you to go away. Not even for one night. But that really shouldn't stop you. Have you thought about kennelling the pets while you are out?

nikko

To you

Wishing I could give you one in person. So just sending lots.

I think your mom just is trying to run scared. And is trying to make you
stay close. She needs you to stay strong.

Donna

adding to the hugs nikko.
((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))
bizi

Dear Nikko,
I hope that things are going to be all right for you.
Sending hugs.
M.

Thanks everyone............I did look into boarding my dogs for tomorrow night.

She is still in her room. I ended up having a short argument with her last night.

She lied about cleaning up her room (the bed pee) because the sheets were not changed. She did take her pills last night.

I think she took the Vodka and hid it. So, another day of the unknown, it's only 9am and she is still sleeping or drinking her door is shut.

She is supposed to go to the DR's at 1:40pm this afternoon, that is up to her, and I am not pushing the subject or calling to cancel for her either. It is important she goes to check her coumidin level. What can I say.

I'm on a loaner pc, until a week from Monday.

I went about my way yesterday, hair trim, dollar store, walgreen's, pc place, she was still sleeping when I got back at 1:30 when I was doing her laundry,
I had to go in her room, she said I pee'd the bed can you smell it? I said No, and left the room, and did her other laundry she had in her room.

I had made a big pot of my own sauce, then added Italian sausage and made some meatballs, not sure if she even touched it, doesn't look like it.

Happy Weekend......Nikko