[befuddled2]

This whole past week has been my darkest week of my entire life I believe. As you know, I got screwed with the settlement and protective order. I feel anger, saddness, and hopelessnes that my life is still screwed up. I'm basically isolalated and this is what is what seems to be the worst for me. I've called Anon and hope to go to a meeting of theires. I've lost interest in everything. I don't care about a thing, nothing. All I want to do is sleep but I can't. I have increased my meds at night just to be able to get to sleep. I stay doped up during the day just to control my anger. My husband and his lawyer both lied their butts off and made me look like the bad person. And to be honest, it appears my lawyer sucked. I guess money talks though. My husband has all kinds of money at his disposal and I do not. My husband keeps ignoring the protective order and all he got was a slap on the wrist and that's it. His **** should have went to jail. I bet if I I did something to hurt him I'd go to jail and stay there. The f**king system sucks.

befuddled2