My family members have their problems,but it hurts so bad to be rejected in the middle of mine. My dad said some bad things to me on the phone. My sister has been treating me wrong. They are going to stop supporting me. This is hurting me so much.

I started screaming today,because I feel so much pain. What they have said keeps going around,and around in my head. I feel dread,and all kinds of bad thoughts are returning that I use to have. I have not felt like this in 30 years,and my family support is lifting,and I'm being abandoned.

Either that,or there are secrets. My sister may be seeing if social services will take care of me. If this is so,I don't know,but it is killing me. I feel so much pain. I haven't felt like this before. It's torture.

I know the verses,and I know how to comfort,but all of what I know is failing me right now. I'm tired,and don't want to continue to go through this. My interests in life are fading,and I am totally stumped.

Social services still haven't provided me with a therapist. They have provided a NP to medicate me,but what they have given me is not affective.

This is the cry in my heart. BF