Linda, Look at it this way, your David is there with you. There is a part of him inside of you, that will always be with you. His spirit lives on. Why don't you put another chair beside you and sit down and just talk to him and get it all out. Then when you feel up to it, reach out to someone and love them, for David. Let this deep feeling you have for him reach to others. You have a very special relationship with him and this isn't to replace that love, but to love others in his place. I know you will be blest for it.

Find you a good caring church also. They will understand. You have friends. I want so much to help you.
Hugs,
Billie