I should be happy especially when my older sister is getting married on Christmas Eve. I am so stressed out and so down that it isn't even funny. Her grandpa is here and for the last two years he has done nothing but harrass me through letters in the mail. I don't want anything to do with him. He makes me sick to my stomach. How can I make sure I am safe at my sister's wedding? How can I make sure he doesn't try to kidnap me and take me to Arizona with him? How can I make sure that he doesn't hurt me or any one else at the party? He is such a creep and I don't trust him. What am I going to do about this? If I see him I know I am just going to snap! I am already stressed out enough as it is. I just don't need this right now.

Any way I am going to go sleep this off. I hope that by morning I will feel better. I am just so depressed and so blue tonight. I have been crying for a while now and I am just ready for bed. I wish I knew what to do.
Wish

Wish,

Obviously there is more to this story than we know.

Stay away from this person, surround yourself with those that you trust and make sure your never alone.

Are you taking anything for anxiety if not talk to your doctor it could help keep you calm and help you think clearly.

I agree with LeeAnn.

You have documents and, I hope, are not suffering through this abuse alone. Talk to someone who can help you decide how to cope with this. If you believe there are others who may be potential victims, perhaps this should be brought to the family's attention. Show the letters to your doctor, clergyman, therapist, etc. and then decide from there.

The holidays are stressful enough without having to deal with matters such as this one.

I was a vicitm of sexual abuse by an uncle through the years of 7-9. I never told anyone about this until I sought a psychologist when I was in my 20's. I don't recommend that these types of matters be tucked away in the family closet, but you will need to know how to deal with this in a way that is healthy for YOU. I kept mine a secret out of guilt and I don't wish that on anyone.

Good luck, and I really mean that.

My family knows that he is not safe to be around. I just don't understand why they allow him to come. I mean I know that he is my sister's grandpa and that he is family to her but he is not very good news for anyone. The last time he was here he kept begging me to go out dancing with him and to go out to dinner with him. I knew that he would do something more if I gave him the chance to, but I didn't. I just kept away from him. Every time he showed up to our house I took off and didn't come home until he was gone. I spent a few nights out in my car parked along side the road because of this. Every since then he keeps sending me letters telling me how much he loves me and how much he wants me for his own. I just don't like this man. He has a sick mind!! I know if I see him I will just hurt myself. I don't want to do this so I've been staying away from my sister's house. I keep praying that he would just leave but he is still here. I wish I could see my therapist eariler than Thursday. I am just so stressed out it isn't funny.
Wish

Does your sister know about the letters? And, more importantly, does she know about yours fears and anxiety? If not, why haven't you told her. If she does know, why is grandpa still allowed to come? If my sister was so stressed out about a relative I would get rid of that person.

If she will not, please heed Snoopy's advice!

Take care and best of luck,
nancy-h

((((((((((((((Wish)))))))))))))

I agree that you need to avoid this guy and tell your sister or another family member of his harrassment of you if you havent already done so

can you contact your therapist and ask for an emergency earlier appointment to discuss this? It isnt good for you to have this plaguing you.

Yes my sister knows about the letters. She also knows about all the harrasment he has been doing because he's been doing it to her too. I just don't understand why she let's him come here. Any way, I think my prayers have been answered. He might be leaving before the wedding due to a sickiness that a family member has. I'm so relieved now!! I am so going to talk to my doctor about things today. I have an appointment. I'm just not sure what I'm going to tell him yet.
Thanks,
Wish

Wish
i hope he has in fact left and that you are feeling more at peace.

hi..talk things out with your therapist..that's what they are here for ..say a little more each visit as much as you are comfortable with..glad he will not be there for the wedding...this should be a day for you to enjoy and not worry about watching your back...enjoy the holidays and have a safe and peaceful new year....moonstar

My sister's grandpa has left and I do feel a lot better now. Finals are over with too and I did great on them. I have this huge sence of relief now and tomorrow I see my therapist so hopefully I will be able to tell her things tomorrow. As for right now I need to get back to bed. It is almost 3 am and I am up. LOL! Thanks everyone for the support!
Wish