Hi everyone..
Sorry I tend to drop off the face of the earth sometimes..
When I'm feeling better I am out doing all that I can.

I have had my relapses.. I have learned from each and everyone of them.. EXCEPT I need to SLOW DOWN.

This exacerbation is BAD.

My vision has been so bad for two weeks now.
Double-triple-sometimes quadruple vision.
Weakness.
Wobbling.
Cognitive dysfunction.
Tremors.
Spasm.
Bowl Issues.
The horrible spins/vertigo.
Which of course is followed by nausea.
Moods are INSANE.
Things that are not moving are moving.
And no matter how still I sit, I'm still 'moving'.

What concerns me the most is..

I am on day 3 of 5 days Solu-medral. And have not seen any improvements.
On another bad note.. This is my 5th session of IV since I was diagnosed in 09. Another thing that's different about this drip that concerns me is I don't feel like I normally do when on IV. Usually I have energy, almost to the point of insomnia.. This time, I'm battling fatigue, before, during and after the drip.
I am praying that this is just such a bad flare that It's taking more to get the inflammtion down.. Very scared that the solu-medral is not going to work anymore. When I finish this round I will be starting a monthlong taper of nasty Prednisone.

My job that I found to work with me and this disease is a DELIVERY position.. So I am out of work until I can get the -non-drunk- eyes back on..

No medical assistance, no ssdi.

I just don't know how I will make ends even come semi-close to meeting.

My doctor sent me to the hospital to be admitted for these 5 days.
I probably should have done so, but since I have zero insurance, I begged them to just let me come in everyday this week for hour long drips.

Guess since life is, once again, put on hold.. I'll start the ssdi process all over again. I was also thinking about having my friend take me to DHS to apply for medicaid while I look this bad.. They seem to think I make all this stuff up.. YEAH I TOTALLY WISH ALL OF THIS WAS NOT REAL.

I just want to go back to work and be like all the other healthy 25 year olds.

Sorry for this depressing rant