[Erin524]

So, after a month's worth of PT (26 visits), I finished PT today. With pretty much no improvement at all, and in maybe two of the evaluations today, I went backwards, and got worse. The physical therapist told me that there really wasn't anything that they could do to help, and that I should go talk to the physiatrist, and then go find myself a gym to work out at. (I thought I was doing the PT to get to the point where I could go to the gym. I don't feel like the PT did enough to help me. I've done PT before where I actually could tell it was helping. The problem with the PT that I just finished, they had stupid scheduling practices, and sometimes they'd make go more than a week without PT. Doing exercises at home apparently wasn't enough for me.

So disappointed. Now I'm worried that I'm stuck...that I'm getting worse. Everything is going all to heck for me anyways. I have no friends. The only time any of my friends contact me, is to send me notifications to play candy crush on facebook. (that game is stupid). No one *actually* talks to me anymore. About the only people I know right now that I would consider friends is a group of girls on a crochet/knitting website that I go to. (we're all fans of anything to do with Sherlock Holmes) But everyone in that group all live all over the world. None of them are actually anywhere near me. So it's just all online friends.

I haven't seen my boyfriend in person since May. (he broke his leg, so was out of action most of the summer) I've talked to him on Skype, but other than that, nothing. I'm starting to think that I might not have a boyfriend anymore. I haven't talked to him for the better part of a month.

Think this is that weird phenomenon that I've read other people with MS have issues with. When you get diagnosed with a serious disease, you learn who your real friends are. Apparently I didn't have any actual friends.

I feel like the three doctors that I've been seeing (neuro, physiatrist, and my regular doctor) have been ignoring me and don't care. I was having issues a couple of weeks ago. Called the neuro to find out what to do. He told me to call the physiatrist. Called the physiatrist, and he told me he couldn't help me with the problem and to call the neuro.

Went to my regular doctor, and all he did was talk to me for about twenty minutes, and tried to calm me down from the stress of it all. Other than that, no help from him either.

When I first got diagnosed, the doctors led me to believe that they'd be able to help me with stuff. All I had to do was ask. But, when I asked, they don't seem all that willing. If it's something that they actually can not do, instead of telling me to go see another doctor. Tell me why they can't help me. If it's something medically impossible, tell me. If it's just something that's not part of their specialty, then tell me that too. The whole just leaving me in the dark about what's going on is not helping me at all. It's actually causing me a lot of anxiety.

I have all these issues with walking. You'd think the physiatrist would at least offer me options for things to do about that. Only thing he helped with tho, was getting me hand controls for my car. (actually got the Rx for the hand controls from another physiatrist, but the current one signed off on them for me once I got the training and bought the controls)

Just don't like the way things have been going. I've been feeling things get worse and worse, and when I ask for help I get nothing. If I wasn't depressed before, I am now.