My mom and I don't talk much (haven't much in the last 13 years), she's not happy with who I am married to and I have to many kids, and so now. So we don't talk much, anyway I get an email from her wanting to know if I am OK now from my LP now and if the blood patch helped. I email her back and told her I didn't get the blood patch just the caffeine IV and it helped. So she emails back Oh you should have gotten the blood patch, it helped her SO much when she had her LP. What LP???

I called her and asked her when she had an LP and why. It was a long time ago (she never said how long) and get this, The Dr tries to tell her she had MS

She goes on to tell me that she didn't have any SX of MS so she know it wasn't right. She goes on to tell me that she is so sure I don't have MS and that I'm worring about this all too much. How in the world does she know what I even worry about when she doesn't even know what goes on in my life.

I asked her why she had the LP done and she said because for PCP asked her to, I asked why and she said SHE DIDN'T KNOW I asked her what SX she had and all she would tell me is none that were from MS. I asked her if she was still seeing the same Dr about her SX and she said no because this was before she moved (I don't know what time she means, she had moved 3 times since I left home). I told her if a Dr told her she has or even might have MS she needs to see a Dr about it. I just got an ear full of on how she doesn't have MS.

BTW, I live in TX and she lives in FL so I can't just go over to her house and make her go to the Dr. Not that I am worried about her seeing a Dr., she's 59 and is able to drive her self to the Dr and tell him whats going on. I just can't believe she didn't tell me this back when it happened.

wow!

sounds like itsa good thing you're in tx

i wouldn't worry about your mother... she's a big gurl

big hugs to you, tho... for the loss in your heart

Thank you, I'm not going to worry about her. But for her to know I think I might have MS and her to know that she was told she has it and not tell me, well that just flat out makes me mad. I know that they say MS is hereditary but than you read over and over agin how more than one family member has MS.

i'm sure if you think about it, her actions aren't a suprise.

i mean... doesn't a bear always act like a bear?

she gave you birth, but you give you life

Yeah, it doesn't surprise me at all. I guess I feel like she didn't tell me because she didn't want to help me get DX with something she doesn't want me to have.

the best medicine in a case like this is a great big

I can relate. My Mom (and Dad for that matter) wouldn't tell me things unless I asked, and even then I wasn't sure to get an answer. But we haven't spoken in about 10 years. They don't know about my MS.

As for keeping information to themselves; when I was 16 I was hospitalized for a week for a series of tests for a limp I developed. about 5 years later I read an article about a woman with MS and the tests she went through. They were the same tests I had done! Assuming a clean bill of health, I never thought too much more about it.

Flash forward 30 years. New SX, new tests, new Dx, MS. I write for my records from way back when and discover a diagnosis of RSD! No one ever told me about it.

The things parents do in the name of protecting you. (I'm sure my mom didn't want me to worry about it, which, as it turned out I didn't have to. I'm one of the lucky few whose RSD goes into remission and stays there.)

WOW, I can't imagine being DX with something (not knowing it) and my mom not telling me. So glad the RSD hasn't been giving you problems.

my parents were both VERY close-mouthed about medical histories and personal histories.

it wasn't until I was having my first baby that I learned (from my mom) that:

1. my maternal grandmother was actually a STEP-grandmother, that my biological grandmother had died in childbirth... and two of her sisters had MS.

2. my paternal grandfather was ALSO not related to me biologically, he married my Nana AFTER she had two children by a previous husband.

3. bipolar disorder and MS run in my family, and that over a DOZEN of my uncles, great-uncles, and aunts had been institutionalized, or committed suicide.

skeletons, skeletons...

My mother had Polio growing up and was VERY closed mouthed about all she went through, and always felt like a burden on the family. We have spent many distant years apart, for many reasons. We now have some contact after years apart. There is NO WAY I could/should drag her to an MD.

Please know that your mom does NOT want to open that can of worms. She was probably in her own way trying to reach out to YOU! and did not mean to open the door to you interrogating her about whether she does or doesnt have MS.

There are many that may have it, but are quite happy with the answers they have been given and have come to terms with how to live around what ever symptoms they have. Unless your mom is not ambulatory, or is in great pain, or in such a cog fog that she is not making any sense, the best you can do is let her know you are there for her IF she ever decides to investigate it further. As for now, it sounds like she has given you her answer.

you have quite a full plate with all that is going on in your life. you have children to care for, and you yourself dont feel good. your husband is just now starting to see that you are experiencing something beyond anxiety. I know you are fighting hard to get some answers and trying to make sense of what is happening to you.

I walk that same fragile thin line with my own mom, and I know how quickly it can be blown away. Just as you would not want her standing over you to tell you how, when, and why do get things done, its not fair to do it to her.

I am glad you two are talking again. grandmoms can be awesome!