I was diagnosed in Feb of this year so I'm still dealing with the post traumatic stress on that! I have three boys (9,7, and 4) and I feel like I lost the ability to be a great mother to them. My ex took them to the beach yesterday and it was too hot there was no way I could go with them.

I will try and continue going back to school in the fall but I had my first bout of muscle spasms in class and freaked everyone out since everyone thought I was having a stroke.

I have for this moment decided not to date. I don't have a handle on this and don't think I want to explain to someone why I'm too tired to do anything, all the meds I'm on, and most people are worried you're going to be crippled and they would have to take care of you.

I am going to try and work so I don't know financially if this is going to be a problem but for the moment it's ok and I'm squirreling away money every chance I get, especially for my sons.

Cheryl,
For the short amount of time I've posted on here I read your posts and see how you plow through your challenges and it makes me want to get through mine. So, I very much appreciate what you do and who you are as a person.

Monique

My uncle (my dad died and this man was the closest thing I ever knew to a father) had MS. He had a pool he could not use due to heat sensitivity, but he kept it for us kids.

He'd have drinks and snacks all summer - his dd was grown, but the rest of us lived over there, lol. He had a stereo system in the carport, and he sat in the A/C in his livingroom, and we'd pop inside to talk with him.

Some of my fondest memories are of those days. So don't think missing out on the beach makes your kids think any less of you. You'll be surprised what they will remember - you will give them plenty of good times, but you have to take care of you to take care of them.



My sis asked me to join her and some other women on a Mother's day get away. I said I'd see if I was up to it. I let her know a couple of days before they left that I was.

The other women didn't understand why it took me so long to get back to her on that - they don't know me that well. I never know if I'll be up to things.

At one point, they decided to have a go at the hotel's hot tub - I declined, but did put my feet in for no more than 5 minutes as we sat and chatted.

I got such a round of vertigo I scared them all trying to walk out of the pool room and make it back upstairs.

I had to explain why that was - I just said I'm heat sensitive and give me a minute, I'll be fine. Which I was.

But I'd been doing so well, hiding how bad the elevator was messing with me that it made me embarrassed to be all drunk-walking in front of them, and mostly that it had worried my sister.



I'm used to it, it's no big deal to me, but I was mad that she had to get upset about it.

This is part of why this stinks. Never knowing how we're going to be. How other people respond to how we are.

The thing I try to remember is that nobody really knows how they're going to be, how life is going to be - if they think they do, it's an illusion. Because whatever their life may be right now that can all change in an instant. We just live knowing that every minute, for better or worse. At least we are not totally blindsided by these changes.

Yes, you're right. I just try my best in any situation. I will go back to grad. school and try my hardest to get through the entire year! The most important people in my life are my sons.

The problem with the boys is they are so used to mommy being "normal" that they truly don't understand mommy needing naps or not being able to do the things they want me to do. But, I still try for them. I told my ex who is sometimes in denial that I couldnt go to the beach that it'll make my symptoms worse and he suggested Chucky Cheese. So I will probably take them there this week so I'll have the a/c and they can run around like nuts.

I think the hardest part is being the only one with MS in my family because no one thinks I have it "cause I am the only one" and esp when I'm fine a couple months ago and now my body is breaking down a little they don't understand. Speaking of my little angels, they are fighting over the videogames and my 4 yr old is trying to eat the seeds out of an apple. Mom's work is never done!! Help!!

Monique