Hi,
This is a pitiful post.

I am involved with a group of people who study books about metaphysics, spiritual, wholesome things (for lack of better description). The people in this group are very involved in energy healing (Reiki), natural cures, organic eating and living green, holistic lifestyles... Some of them believe that if you are sick, you choose to be sick -- but before you feel anger - please understand - they are not "condeming" or critical and I am not qualified nor capable of explaining this thought process since much of this is fairly new to me and I don't agree with everybody.

I love these people and I am learning so much. It is making me so aware of the food you put in your mouth, where it comes from, the lotions on our skin, the cleaners we use and things that are toxins. What I am learning is so valuable to me and the people are so wonderful and loving and good people...

And now, here comes the negative. I cannot control when I am sick, yesterday I had a horrible migraine, I tried so hard not to take my Imitrex, to breathe deeply and meditate and 2 of ladies did a Reiki treatment on me. In the end, by the end of the day I was so sick, nearly vomitting, and I had to take an Imitrex. The drug stopped my migraine, amazingly, but my body by then, had become completely stiff and so painful that I could barely move -- this happens when I get a really bad migraine or get too hot, or just overdo it. Sometimes this happens even before I get the migraine. I don't know WHY, I don't know if this is a manifestation of MS, or if this is only a result of the migraine but the pain is awful. Today I am still in horrible pain and came home from work because I was having so much trouble walking.

Soooo my frustration is that I am trying so hard to live more purely, holistically, and healthy and when I get completely sick, I find myself feeling like a failure. It is a little depressing. I have an appointment with a Naturopahty doctor in April to try a more holistic approach to my health in general.

I don't know why I posted this - I just had to say it somewhere to somebody that can understand me. I just want to be healthy and well and out of pain.

Do you think the pain/ stiffness that I experience with migraines is a manifestation of MS or some very strange migraine problem ???? I don't know anybody who has migraines that has their entire body effected.

I'm just sad - just very sad about the whole thing. I'm even signed up to take a Reiki class to try and help heal myself through energy healing. I guess I would do just about anything to get better....

Snoods

Well, you don't need to feel like a failure, Snoodles. After all, YOU know your body better than THEY do, even if they'd like you to believe otherwise. Sure, it sounds like a great idea going holistic, but you don't want to feel worse, for goodness sake!

I just feel so bad that you tried so hard and it didn't work. Doesn't mean that YOU failed -- just that your body failed to respond to an unfamiliar treatment. It obviously wanted the Imitrex!

Now then, about that stiffness -- would a massage help? I would get you into massage therapy ASAP! Good luck, sweetie. It's not you, it's the stupid MS. And no, you didn't choose to have that. We understand and are pulling for you. Rah Rah Snoodles! Kick 'em in the Caboodles!

Snoodles

I'm sorry about the pain. Whenever I get sick my MS sx act up something awful. Any little change....whether it's the weather, my temperature, an infection of some sort......and my MS sx go haywire. I think yours is probably the result of your body being in such pain from the migraine.

Please don't think of yourself as a failure. I honestly don't believe that we can "choose" not to be sick. It's more than mind over matter. And telling yourself that you can overcome things like this by just thinking your way out of it is bound to make you feel like a failure because it won't work! If it could every doctor would be out of business within a month! Wouldn't that be wonderful!

I hope you're feeling better today...and don't let those headaches get to the point of no return where it takes you days to recover. That cannot be good for your body or your mind.

Hugs........

You're certainly not a failure! You sound like an open-minded, intelligent person who is doing everything you can to help your MS. I think that's brave and admirable. Keep on doing what you're doing. My grandmother is involved in a very similar group, and she and I have talked a lot about all the meds I'm on. She always says there's no reason why you can't do both without hurting your integrity, and I think she's right. Whatever works!

I think (or hope) that these moments of self-pity can be helpful too. It's good to get it out and clear the air. You may not be able to get rid of your MS with mind over matter, but you can help the way you feel about it, and maybe more. Keep on!

(((Snoodles))) You are not a failure whatsoever.

When I was 1st diagnosed, I talked to my brother who spent many years doing neurological research (including your migraine headache and several MS meds) about going natural and/or using homeopathics to help me out. He gave me great advice that I will share with you.

When you have a chronic illness, trying to go all natural is not the best. It can be beneficial to combine the both but the fact remains that you need some of the meds. The same holds true with your migraines.

Just recently, I had spasms bad enough where my leg was stuck and I had no range of motion. I called my brother to see if in any of his MS patients did he ever have to work with them to release the spasms. He didn't as when he saw them they were able to move and get to the office. He asked if I was on baclofen or something like that. I told him that I was unable to tolerate the baclofen so they gave me Valium but I hadn't tried it yet as I want to stay off as many meds as possible.

Again, he gave good advice and said that when things get bad like this, that is the time to take the meds. I gave in and took the Valium, spent the weekend somewhere, I am not sure where. My body was home but . . .LOL. I did realize that Valium is not my "quality of life" friend. Anyhow, my point is that somewhere along the line we all have to give in and take the meds to help us out. That does not make us failures.

Again, it's the same as your migraine meds. There is a time where you have to give in and relieve some of the pain. It is not failing, it is improving your quality of life by taking some of the pain away.

I don't get migraines so I don't know if there is a relationship between what you are experiencing and MS. Maybe some others have more experience with the 2 of them than I do.

In the meantime, keep doing what you are doing. Trying to live a healthier life is awesome and I am proud of you for doing what you are doing. AND if you need to take the Imitrex, take it.

Hang in there and let us know how you are doing.

I think you have to take from both approaches, and not do either in isolation.

Often I use self-hynosis and deep breathing exercises to get through some types of pain. So far I have not taken any real meds for neurological symptoms (like burning, numbness, etc.), and I know a lot of people find relief from neurontin, baclofen, what-have-you. I just don't take them because I really have a horrible time with most meds, so I try to stick to natural methods.

On the other hand, with migraines, etc., I use meds every time. I have a high tolerance to pain, but I have learned that I leave that type of pain until I (personally) can not bear it any more, it will REALLY mess with my thinking, and it take me DAYS to get it under control.

I remember telling the nurses that I didn't need pain relief when I was in the hospital for something. They told me that they give it every four hours on schedule because if you leave pain too long, it is WAY, WAY harder to get it under control again. That is true.

I think it is extremely healthy of you to be using all your options for managing the symptoms from this disease. But, don't feel bad if something doesn't work, and don't be surprised if it does the next time.

Cherie

My point exactly Cherie! You just worded it far better than I.

(((((((((((Snoods)))))))))) You are being way to hard on yourself here. Cherie is right....a happy medium between the two approaches is the way to go.

JUst wanted to say that I feel so sad that you are feeling so terrible, Snoods! My DD has migraines and I totally feel for anyone who has to suffer w/those headaches.

Sending healing thoughts your way. Hope you feel better soon and don't ever think of yourself as a failure; because you are not.

{{{Snoodles}}}}

You aren't a failure. What this group does, paying attention to food and other products, is commendable and I think overall it can help. But if you need your medication for things like your migraine then you need to take your medication. I don't see why you can't take the positive things from this group and put them into your life while also taking your necessary medications.