[Tina1960]

i am new here and looking for a place to help... i am SO AFRAID of my upcoming spinal fusion surgery. it's a COMPLEX surgery... and the risks are high and frightening. first surgery will be 4-6 hours and is L2-S1 anterior spinal fusion, graft placement. they go through my stomach to do this surgery.

the second surgery will be 2 days later and is: T10-S1 posterior spinal fusion, T10-illium, L1-5 decompression. the risks are high here (will need blood transfusion and will be in ICU for 2 days). this surgery is estimated to last from 8-12 hours.

i will then go to my room and will begin walking on day #3 with a walker. home after 7-9 days in the hospital, although they could send me to a care home (they can't, i'm a single mom, with no family except my children). no driving for 2 months, etc.

i'm in a TOTAL PANIC. i am thinking i need to endure the pain for a few more years, delay the surgery.. my children are still so young (14 and 12) and i've got pets depending on me.

i really need to talk to others who have had spinal fusion surgery and can help alleviate my concerns or maybe help me make the decision to go through with the surgeries, or not.

lastly, the doc wants to do my cervical fusion approximately 3 months after this lumbar fusion is doing, depending on how i'm doing.

PLEASE HELP ME. i don't know how to post... hope this goes through. i need to post more, i think, so i can chat? how does this work? i'm so overwhelmed.

[Jomar]

Hello,
I'll post a link to our spinal forum for you & I'll place a copy of your post over there so others can say hello, and offer help & info .

Spinal Disorders & Back Pain
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum22.html

The kids should be good helpers for you during recovery at that age, at least they aren't toddlers anymore....now that would be a big challenge.

I know of a teenager that had to have a 9 levels fused due to severe scoliosis, she did quite well. No grafts needs though.
approx 1.5 weeks in hospital
another 2 weeks or so before much activity at home.

[Tina1960]

thank you for the link. i will go check it out. is it true you have to post **before going into chat. i want to talk to folks who have had this done. i've had surgeries to my knees/shoulders, and even c-sections and surgery for uterine cancer... but, this seems so invasive and to be under anesthesia for so long... just worries me. i'm not so young anymore and the risks are high. my children, although older, are unable to drive. that is the biggest challenge... getting them to and from school. thanks.

I've not had this surgery, Tina, so I can't help you there. It certainly sounds scary, so I can understand your being terrified. I hope you get to converse with people here who've been thru it, so you can hear from "them what's been thru it"!

In the meantime, though, have you asked about your surgeon's success rate? The hospital's? It might make you feel better to find out that on average you're being operated on by a top doc at a place where this surgery has a high success rate. Now, if it turns out that's not the case, you might want to ask some more questions. I'm betting the kids can find ways to get to school with friends or somehow, & all the other stuff can be worked out. I think it all comes down really to this: You're scared. But that's normal.

Facing surgery of that complexity & risk, I'd think a few sessions with a therapist or counselor wouldn't be amiss. Do you have any such thing available? Talk with your surgeon.

As for putting the surgery off, I'd think that would only increase the risks of having it done later--you'd be older, your back more deteriorated. There will always be reasons not to do it now. If not because the kids can't drive, then because they can!

A lot of us here are facing things which sometimes have us scared. We stop by to say so, & to get some virtual hand-holding & s. Feel free, any time.

[Darlene]

Tina,

Hello and welcome to NeuroTalk. Happy to see you have come, just let us know if we can be of any help. Feel free to just jump in any where.

There are great number of fellow members here to assist as possible. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Again welcome, looking forward to seeing you around.

Darlene

[(Broken Wings)]

Welcome to NT

You are facing a lot of challenging medical conditions. God bless you and guide you.

You have too many upcoming surgeries. I am afraid for you too. That is a lot.

I'm sure you need these as I don't think any surgeon would put any human at risk to this extent. So sorry you are suffering with so much. It's not fair.

I am scared for you. It would only be natural for a mother of two children to be concerned.

Here is a link to the chat room. http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/chat/flashchat.php

I have chated a few times but not enough to tell you how.

You are welcome here to ask any question that pops up. No question is stupid. Sometimes funny, but humor is good.

Please show your children how to log on to NT. There are many mothers and fathers here that will reach out to them if they need them.

[Tina1960]

still scared and don't want to upset anyone by not having surgery... just can't fathom the ICU and blood transfusion, breathing tube, after care... need to come to conclusion and soon. won't let me in chat as i've only posted 3 times, i think. frustrating. wish i had all the answers.

[(Broken Wings)]

It's okay...

Totally understandable.

Seriously, have you tried venting by maybe getting out, in your vehicle maybe, and just screaming a time or two.

Post a few times, even if it's just a quick post.

You probably need someone to talk with, several times a day.

Perhaps you may need several different people to help you though some of it.

How about a counselor? A good nurse? friend? and yes, cyber friends are great. They will come along. Keep posting and looking around.

Do you have a person who can deal with some or all of this?

You are in a pickle.

And the downside to not having surgery right now is?????

If you're as bad off as you sound, you're not doing too good right now by any stretch or an imagination. I'm sure your boys have been a big help.

Do write down your concerns, as there would be many, and address them as you can get answers for them.

Post some questions here.

Hang in there. ((()))

One day at a time. One issue at a time.

Yoga and deep belly breathing may help you get a relaxed moment or two in.

Originally Posted by Tina1960

still scared and don't want to upset anyone by not having surgery... just can't fathom the ICU and blood transfusion, breathing tube, after care... need to come to conclusion and soon. won't let me in chat as i've only posted 3 times, i think. frustrating. wish i had all the answers.

My dear, dear Tina, please try to breathe deeply, slowly, & stay as much as possible in the present.

Upsetting others by not having surgery ought not to be an issue. Do you need this surgery? Talk with your children. Ask them whether things can go on as they are, or whether they think you've reached a point where the pain is interfering with your quality of life. They are old enough to know this.

Have you checked into the record or your surgeon & hospital? If they aren't top notch, you may seriously want to reschedule. But soon.

Hugs, prayers.