My New Thread
 

Last post of old thread:

My anxiety is, well, "not good" right now. It's mainly an increase in OCD thinking. I checked my pill minder and all my meds are in order. It's not out of control though. The klonopin is helping, but there is a change, so I have to be mindful of that. I'm up from 1/2mg of klonopin to 2.5mg a day over the last 2 days and that's significant. I'm pushing my limit.

I have an idea about what could be causing, or at least contributing to, the increased anxiety (maybe I'll write about it tomorrow?). Hopefully once that situation is resolved, I'll feel better. I just have to be careful about how bad this gets and how long it lasts, and make sure it doesn't lead to something worse. Right now my mood is stable.

If this persists and/or the klonopin can't control it, I'll go see my pdoc who will likely max me out on seroquel. I really don't want to go now because I don't want to do that for something that could be temporary. I can often find ways to manipulate myself and reduce my anxiety to a manageable level if given enough time…. but that usually applies to increases in GAD.

Kay
This may seem odd or weird. But my anxiety gets worse when it gets
hot. Whether I'm inside or outside.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

My anxiety hasn't improved. It was worse yesterday. I just had a bunch of **** thrown at me that I just wasn't up to dealing with, but my anxiety is still fairly manageable working with the 3mg of klonopin.

I don't know if you remember, but I was supposed to take a big hit this month with a roughly $630 auto insurance payment, but my agent was able to arrange for that to be spread out over the three remaining months of the policy…
But I got an email last night reminding me that that $630 payment would be withdrawn from my account on the 16th, so I freaked out. Of course the co. was closed, so I had to sit on it all night and this morning until they opened. My husband applied plenty of pressure to "fix the ****," because he was, "****ing sick of it."
I called at 9:01am. Oddly, only half of the adjusted payment was due to be withdrawn, so I ended up making a $160 one time payment on top of the scheduled EFT to get things back on track. I'm going to have to keep an eye on things because I obviously can't rely on anything they email or mail me.
I don't even want to think about how outrageous the cost of our policy will be, or my husband's reaction to it will be, when it's time to renew it at the end of August. But of course I am thinking about it.


I received a text from an unknown number yesterday saying, "Hey." I asked who it was, but got no response. I have a feeling I know who it is, and the contact is not welcome. He was a "friend" I hung out with during my manic period when I was separated from my husband. Even though I was ****ed up, I knew back then he was a bad person, and told him repeatedly to stop contacting me. He resurfaced again trying to call and text me about 6 months ago and I told him to **** off again. My husband got angry because he knew he was a male I hung out with while we were separated. I'm not entirely sure if it is him because I deleted the ***hole's number a long time ago, but it's obviously someone I severed contact with for a reason if I deleted their number, too. My main concern is my husband getting angry again because it doesn't take much to set him off. It's very upsetting. I just hope that whoever it was realized I didn't recognize their number because I deleted it, and that will deter them from contacting me again. It would be even better if I was a wrong number.


My father-in-law is coming up from Florida, and will be here this weekend. I think that's triggering the big increase in my anxiety. I'm not terribly nervous about seeing him because we have a pretty close relationship. We're in regular contact. I haven't seen him in two years, but that's because he lives in Florida and didn't make the trip North last year.

I'm really worried because usually our visits with my father-in-law include my sister-in-law. I haven't seen her (or his mother or step father) since before my husband and I separated about two years ago, even though my husband and I have been back together for a year and a half. I know she didn't support our reconciliation, but I have no idea what her current feelings are because my husband doesn't talk about things like that. I don't ask because I really don't want to know. I think the possibility of having to face her and being rejected is what's triggering more memories, the heightened anxiety, and the OCD thinking.

We always take my father-in-law to the same diner on Father's Day when he's up north. I spoke to my husband and texted my father-in-law to let them both know I wouldn't be going. I really don't want it to be awkward and ruin Father's Day, I don't want to make my sister-in-law uncomfortable, and I just don't have the fortitude to sit through a breakfast with two of my husband's relatives I haven't seen in the two years since our separation and my s/s attempt. I thought making this decision, and making it known early, would help alleviate some of my anxiety, but it hasn't.

When I texted my father-in-law yesterday, I expected a fairly simple conversation. Instead it led to an uncomfortable conversation about my separation from my husband. I really, really, really didn't need that.

It was a **** day.

So far this morning, I feel a lot better than yesterday. I slept in, but still woke up like a shot with high anxiety again. It's about noon and I'm only at 1mg of klonopin, but that's only because I'm about to leave the house and am uncomfortable driving on more than that right now.

Kay

It sounds like you found the issue for your anxiety. Maybe you can explain
to your father-in-law better why after you see him.

I totally understand.

Donna :hug::hug::grouphug:

Yesterday was a much better day. I was able to clear up the insurance mess early, so eventually the stress over that faded away. I went out for a quick errand. It was sunny out, so it was a good day to get out for a little while following several sedentary days locked up in the apartment. I was back down to 2mg of klonopin and was actually able to take a nap.

This morning I woke up with less anxiety. I'm hoping that I'm going to have an even better day today :)

I told my father-in-law only that I wasn't going to be going to breakfast on Father's Day because I didn't want my sister-in-law to feel uncomfortable, and he did understand. I told him I'd already discussed the matter with my husband and asked him not to mention it to my sister-in-law. Meddling is sort of in his nature, and this is a sensitive subject.

I don't discuss the extent of my issues with anxiety and OCD with my husband. When things are bad, he can sometimes tell something's off, but he can't tell what it is. I internalize (probably because growing up my family members could always smell blood in the water), and he's not very astute, so I can hide things very well. There's a snowball's chance in hell I would admit to him how much facing his sister (or other family members) would effect me. He would turn it around on me, and it would ignite an argument about what a piece of **** he thinks I am.

I've decided I want to get the upgraded version of the Keurig coffee brewer, and I'm going to go check it out in person today. I want to make sure it's not a behemoth and will fit on our countertop before I buy it online. I have a coupon for BBB, and if I can use it, the price would be competitive. I may end up bringing one home today.

Before I can even think about leaving the house, I have to win today's battle of the laundry wars. I started at 7am and it's about 9 now… I have one load in the dryer and one still in the washer. The times are staggered so there's no way I can shower while the laundry is going. I don't want to find my laundry on the floor…

Kay,

That is good that your f-in-law and you settled the non-breakfast on father's day.
I understand about not telling your husband these things.

Did the upgraded version of the Keurig coffee brewer pass your inspection?

Mari

Yesterday morning started out well.

It took me 4 hours to finish my laundry. Luckily I started early at 7am, so that didn't bother me as much as usual.

While waiting for my laundry, I started battling with my printer. First, it wouldn't print because the "magenta" ink (which I did not need) was low, then I couldn't get it to connect to my wireless network (which I was forced to reset Monday) because the wireless signal was too weak (AGAIN).

I took a quick shower and went out to run many errands…

After taking a look at the new updated Keurig, and realizing I'd be saving $30, I took one home! It has all the options I wanted, and it's very pretty. Absolutely no buyer's remorse.

I set up the Keurig when I got home. Then I installed new ink cartridges in the printer and some how managed to get it online and print the documents I needed from the insurance co.

I worked myself up into a frenzy trying to get everything done. I don't know how well the klonopin would have worked during the day because I was only on 1mg while I was out because I was driving, but I took another mg when I got home and settled down a bit.

I did way too much yesterday. I definitely did not get enough sleep after all of yesterday's activities. I have to run to the post office, but otherwise will be resting at home today.

I'm thinking about going to the club tomorrow, but that depends on whether or not I'm able to get any housework done today.
Last week I did my grocery shopping on Friday. I would like to put it off until Saturday this week if I can.

Kay,

So very very happy to hear that you have theKeurig and that it is new and that you got a great price!

I remember those laundry days of dealing with "community facilities."
Hubby wanted to get our own little place here so he could trust that his packages
would get delivered and I wanted to move out of the apt to get our own
washer / dryer.
Both recent-ish hurricanes involved our having to get back to work
although we had no power and no way to do clothes in our building.
It was a big hassle.

--
You are busy with lots to take care of.
I especially admire that you dealt with insurance taking out the payment.

You have lots together.


M

My husband and I bought a town-house style condo about year after we were married. We lived there for only a few months before I was diagnosed with MS, and about a year before I had to stop working. With the loss of my income, and the cost of COBRA and my medical care, we couldn't afford to pay the mortgage anymore and were forced into a short sale. The funny thing is over the course of the 7 years or so we've been at this ****** apartment, our rent is much more expensive than the mortgage payment was. We were just in a terrible spot at the time of the MS diagnosis. The cost of the COBRA alone was ridiculous, and I couldn't be without insurance.

Our lease here is up for renewal, and we have to sign by July 1st. If we had the money, and I had my way, we'd be out of here. My husband wants the new AC we've been waiting for since last year (I doubt he'll get his way by then). We probably shouldn't be running the one we have because it's an electrical hazard, among other things. I want a new bathroom ceiling because there's a lot of water damage that they've just been spraying. The stains keep coming back and now the ceiling is cracking and falling apart.

Now that I'm on the move I can't believe I was able to sit here stagnant for so long, but I am really pushing it doing too much. I'm definitely taking full advantage of my independence and the opportunity to do what I want. At the present, I think I'm trying to find ways to occupy myself to block out the noise because I'm doing mindless sedentary things as well. It's working to a point, but my body is suffering. I was absolutely exhausted yesterday doing nothing, and this morning I'm still hung over from Wednesday, but I was up at 6:30am again because that's habitual.
I haven't decided if I'm going to go food shopping or not today. I have to take inventory. I will only go if necessary. If I do go, I will be leaving everything but the perishables in the trunk for my husband to take care of.
I am not going to go to the club today, so I guess I'm skipping a week again, but I'm okay with that.

I am LOVING that Keurig! There is a temperature adjustment on it so I can brew a cup of coffee I can drink immediately! After registering it, the company gave me a coupon code for 1/2 off up to 5 packages of K-cups with free shipping. I did the math, and it will save me a lot of dough, so I will definitely be taking advantage of that offer. I just have to choose 5 boxes out of 209 options :confused:

CNN does a slightly better job here than Fox did:

Was Florida shooter's ex-wife right to say he was 'bipolar'? - CNN.com
They say it is likely Anti-Social Personality.

M

Kay,

I remember paying COBRA insurance after my first husband left.
It was expensive and stressful but there was no other way for me to live than to send that check on time every month. Somehow I made it a priority.
(I also prayed for Ted Kennedy and his family everyday for what he was accomplishing with health care.)

That apt needs some major work! I hope the landlord steps up and takes care of things for you.

M

It's gotten to the point now where I know I'm going to have to see my pdoc about my anxiety issues. The klonopin is helping, but the frequency and persistence of my symptoms is concerning. Yesterday was terrible, and this morning isn't starting out well. I'm also having an overlap of PTSD, OCD, intrusive thoughts (pdoc calls it a "ball")… I'm just a ****ing mess when I wake up and/or the klonopin starts to wear off. I'm tempted just to add the extra 50mg of seroquel myself at this point so that I'm not experiencing these symptoms at all.

I woke up with a junky cough and some sinus issues. Yay! I had some Mucinex DM laying around and took that this morning. Hopefully it will work some magic and this problem will disappear. It's my allergies… aside from the allergra (I can't take anymore) has worked.

Thank you for that link Mari. That was good work by CNN, and written for everyman so it can be widely understood. There was nothing said on air during that particular Fox segment that would mitigate the damage done by the anchor's comment. BTW, I'm sorry I ran away with your thread :hug:

We have multiple problems aside from the bathroom ceiling and the AC unit. We call and they just slap bandaids on. You get tired of calling. Those are just the 2 biggies. On Monday I'm going to reload the laundry card and will stop by the office to ask about the new lease. I'm also going to ask for the ETA on the AC unit. I'll show the office manager pictures of the BR ceiling while I'm there and tell her it's time for a permanent fix.

I did do the food shopping yesterday, but I got a late start. I got lucky and my husband was home by the time I got back so I only had to carry 2 light bags :) I was feeling crappy so even though I went to the butcher shop yesterday and I ended up making hot dogs and french fries for dinner.

My husband needs new work boots, so the plan for today is to get that over with. He's super quick. Nobody wants to go shoe shopping with me. I'm terrible. My brother is 8 years younger than me. When I had custody of him (he was 13-15), it was an actual punishment. I'm not kidding.

We swapped the placements of the cat condos, and they're both getting more use now. Buddy is spending half of the morning on a perch behind me instead of climbing all over me, and that's a welcome change because he can get obnoxious. I weighed the cats the other day because Dottie clearly gained weight (4 lbs, so now she's at 21). I was surprised that Rocky lost weight (26 lbs to 23). Buddy stayed about the same at around 7 lbs. I hadn't weighed them in years. Dottie won't eat people food, or even cat treats, and I never see her eat, so I don't know how she got so fat. I keep feeling her up for tumors, but she feels absolutely solid all over. The other two will eat anything.

I'm thinking about hiding some of the toys for a while. We have about 8-10 of them. They're all over the apartment. I put them away, and as soon as I stop vacuuming, get in the shower, or walk out the door (i.e./ to get the mail) Rocky drags them all out again.

The Mucinex DM is really doing the job. I'm still taking the Zyrtec, too. I'm so happy that it doesn't seem like this will linger or lead to a trip to the doctor :)

I don't know if my father-in-law forgot about our conversation, or I'm not privy to other conversations because my husband decided to keep me in the dark, but my father-in-law was under the impression that I would be at breakfast this morning even though I had told him I would not be going and why. I did not go, and he is bull****. I didn't want to make my sister-in-law uncomfortable or ruin father's day for him, but I bet I ended up doing both. I told him it wasn't my sister-in-law's fault, and she probably didn't even expect me to be invited. I hope she doesn't get blamed. My husband should have handled all of this. He obviously didn't, but if it's a **** show, I'll be the bad guy. The jury's still out because they're still eating breakfast.

After breakfast with his father, my husband is going to his mother's to visit his step father. I didn't get him a card, but will send him a text. Sometimes they will return texts, sometimes not. Whatever.

K,

'Glad to hear that the Mucinex and Zyrtec is working.

Any man whether, it was father in law or husband, could easily not
remember/ not have paid attention enough / not passed on the info from you.
You did more than your part in getting the info out.

Jeeze. Your husband had to go to two fathers' days? I was on the phone with
my dad Sunday and did not even say Happy F's Day or send a card or anything.
(I am so removed from the culture of holidays that I am weird and free.)

I hope you had a good day.:hug::hug::hug:

M

My father-in-law's feelings were hurt because I didn't go to breakfast, he's mad at me, and is laying the guilt trip on pretty thick. My husband said it went well, he had a good time, and his father would get over me not going. I feel terrible though.
This won't be the last time we have to deal with this type of issue. My father-in-law will be up north for several weeks, and will expect to see me at some point. I get the feeling my husband doesn't want me to see any of his family members. I'm not making any more excuses. I'll throw my husband under the bus if my father-in-law asks to see me and my husband says no.

My husband left the house at 9am yesterday and came home at 7pm. He only spent about 2 hours with his father (which I think is unfair). He spent the rest of the time at his mother's house to celebrate Father's Day with his step father (I sent him a text and he didn't respond). I made a pot of chili for dinner. I texted my husband at 6:30pm since I hadn't heard from him, and he said he'd already eaten. I wasn't thrilled about that, but at least the chili will keep well in the fridge.

I have a busy week coming up. Wednesday morning I see my neurologist, and my endoscopy is Friday. I hate having two appointments in a week. Friday will definitely be a washout because I'll be sedated for the procedure and will probably want to sleep most of the day when I get home.

I think I'm going to try to do at least phase 1 of the South Beach Diet. I bought the book on Amazon, and it should be here on Friday. I don't know how strictly I'll adhere to it. Even losing a little weight will make me more comfortable. Using the exercise bike is good, but I'm not going to lose any weight that way.

It is hard to get in the way of a man's feelings for his father, mother, step mother.
Apparently,you can advise, suggest, and use some logic, but he is going to
do what he is going to do.

Good luck on South Beach. I did it for a couple of weeks two times and felt good about it.


M

I don't ask my husband too many questions. Sometimes things come up and I get some breadcrumbs, though. I mentioned that I texted his step father "Happy Father's Day," but he didn't return my text. My husband said, "They acknowledge it through me." He never mentions it though. Odd.

We've been back together for a year and a half. I'm sure there has been some conversation about how we are doing, etc. We are doing well, with the exception of his behavior, which he would never acknowledge. He has his reasons for keeping us separate, whatever they are.

I was 11 months sober yesterday. It think if I can do that, I can handle at least 2 weeks of the highly restricted South Beach Diet. I'm not going to cut out coffee though, but I will switch to fat free 1/2 & !/2, use less of it, and use sugar substitute. I don't think it will be too difficult to prepare 2 different dinners. My book arrives on Friday.

I'm going to continue my work on the exercise bike. That can only help.
My only worry is that I won't be taking in enough calories to tolerate the meds I'm on. I'm going to have to listen to my body, and add a few more carbs if I need to.

You have accomplished sooooo much
 

And don't you ever forget it
Just the fact you can and have not
gone off grid
And maintained soberiety is everything
Everything
It is so hard
Just to do
One day at a time when bombarded at all sides
You have kept your composure
Family and how fickle they can be
And amazing job it is to having a significant other in that way
and you are willing to in that unit
You can only do for you
And make things happen for you
Easy it isn't
But you have conquered
One day at a time
You matter
Love
Me

Congrats Kay on the 11 months. Keep up the good work.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

HI kay, just trying to get caught up....
sorry for the fathers day outcomes...what drama.
sigh
I feel for you on many levels.
bizi
I miss the espresso machines of italy.
My coffee was so weak this morning....blah

Thank you Eva, Donna, and Bizi :group hug:

My South Beach Diet book is supposed to arrive on Friday and I intended to start the diet Monday, but my husband's birthday is July 9th, our anniversary is the 10th, and my birthday is the 11th. I buy an ice cream cake every year and we will be eating out. I won't be through Phase 1 of the diet by then, and won't be able to stick to it, so I have decided to wait until the day after my birthday to start it (but may change my mind ?). I was hoping to start sooner, but I guess this will give me more time to plan. I will continue my work on the exercise bike in the meantime.

I'm letting all the crap with my husband's family go for now. I'm not going to waste anymore time thinking about it right now because it's detrimental. If another issue arises, I will make him deal with it. Then maybe I will see some transparency for once.

I see my neurologist today. I will talk to him about my fatigue issues, which haven't improved. I want to discontinue the amantadine. It was too sedating for me to tolerate in the afternoon, so it's likely not helping, and may actually be contributing to am sedation, too. I also have to discuss the edoscopy I'm having on Friday because the reflux and swallowing problems could be due to MS. I do have preexisting swallowing problems due to MS. I have no gag reflex. I'm also losing my balance sometimes and staggering to the left at times when tired, but it could be due to sinus/inner ear issues from my allergies. He can just take a peek in my ears.

My neighbor's mother moved in with him about 6 months ago and she has mild dementia. I ran into him in the laundry room and asked about her because I hadn't seen her in a couple of days. The poor thing fell and broke both her wrists and will require bilateral surgeries. I let him know I'm just across the hall and am usually home, and would be more than happy to do welfare checks when she returns. I hope they send her to rehab for a little while before they send her home because she will be pretty helpless for a while. It's sad because his daughter was married the day before and he said that was the happiest day of his life. They are all very nice people. He's been my neighbor for 6 1/2 years.

poor thing both wrist, how awful, yes she will go to a nursing home/ rehab facilitiy.
You are a good neighbor.:)
bizi

Yes, having two at the same time is very hard. I at 13 had two within 3 weeks for my elbow. Had one cast taken off and one put on. Still was hard because
with elbow breaks they have to take the cast of at 3 weeks. So you don't
lose the mobility in elbow. But still was very sore and hard to use.

Donna :grouphug::hug:

My anxiety has been better the last couple of days and I'm back down to 2mg of klonopin. I didn't make an appointment with my pdoc because I started to feel a little better and I have a pretty busy week already. I'll go in next week if my anxiety gets worse again. I can't take my klonopin tomorrow morning because of the endoscopy… that will be fun.

I saw my neurologist yesterday and he agreed that it was a good idea to try stopping the amantadine. I can always go back on it. If I start experiencing more fatigue, that's a sign it was helping, so I'll go back on it. Discontinuing it should help with my constipation. I told him about the endoscopy. He said if the gastro can't see a physical reason (like scarring as a result of the acid reflux) for my swallowing problems, he would order a modified barium swallow (my last one was years ago). I will have the gastro send him the the ensoscopy report. As usual, we also discussed my fatigue and other ongoing MS symptoms. He's a very good doctor, and very nice.

I don't seem to be in a rush to go anywhere this morning, but the plan is to go to the club at some point. I think the last time I was there was the 6th. I like to get there early to help with prep in the kitchen, but there's no set time to arrive. I could go and sell lunch tickets, or just go to have lunch.

My endoscopy is at 11:45am tomorrow, but I have to be at the hospital for 10:15 because I'm going to be getting propofol. I'll have to take a cab in the morning, but I'm not allowed to take one home because of the sedation. My husband decided he's working a half day so he can pick me up. I was told to expect I will be ready for discharge around 1:30pm. I hope that's a good estimate. Otherwise, he'll be very grouchy.

He's been in a bad mood. He had a long day Sunday dealing with Father's Day, and work has been difficult so far this week. I'm kinda walking on eggshells. At least he's aware he's been a bit of an *******, and has been apologetic.

wow,
"he has been apologetic"....I hate eggshells...
glad that your anxiety has lessened. Happy you have good doctors on your team and that they are nice to you.
You are a nice person!
Maybe you can make it to the center today.
Hoping you get some sort of socialization regularly and that it is not just shopping or laundry which are so taxing on you.
(((((HUGS))))

Hi, Kay,

The neurologist is keeping a good eye on you. And it seems that you two
work well together.



I hope that the endoscopy goes well today.


M

Thank you ladies :)

Maintenance showed up out of the blue to install our new AC yesterday. Talk about an upgrade!!! This one actually puts out cold air, has a lot of bells and whistles, and even has a remote! It's a little confusing though. The timing wasn't great because we were both waking up from naps, but I was just glad to have the issue resolved. My husband should have been happy too, but he was not.

He was a miserable ***** yesterday. At one point, I told him I had had enough of his **** and went in the bedroom to get away from him. He came to me with an apology, asking me to come back into the living room 15 minutes later. His temper and bad behavior continued all night. He's been terrible all week, but last night was the worst. I'm not big on raising my voice, but I did. I had had it with his ****. I told him he had better change his attitude before this weekend… I swear I'll spend Friday through Sunday hiding in the bedroom if I have to.

I didn't end up getting to the club. I was too tired to drive. I went down for a nap at noon and didn't wake up until after 3pm even though I had had 5 cups of coffee beforehand. I obviously needed the rest. I don't know if stopping the amantadine played a role. I need more time to figure that out.

I was naughty and put a little cream in my coffee even though I was only supposed to have clear liquids. Black coffee is a clear liquid. I need coffee. I can take it really dark, just not black. Right now I can't have anything to eat or drink until my procedure. I'm not at all worried about the endoscopy. Just curious. I wonder what they will find?

I am hoping that they give you something to knkock you out for the procedure. Did you say that hubby would come pick you up?
What time do you have to go? When can you eat?
Hoping it all goes smoothly for you and that you find some answers soon, it may be a while for your results?????
bizi

I'm going to be sedated with propofol. I couldn't eat anything solid for 8 hours prior to the procedure which is at 11:45am (but I have to be there at 10:15 because of the anesthesia). I thought I could have clear liquids up to 4 hours prior to the procedure. Unfortunately, I didn't read the whole sheet and I was supposed to stop clear liquids 6 hours before the procedure because I'm having the propofol. I'm going to lie and say I followed the directions though… Maybe not the best idea, but I am not rescheduling.

I have to take a cab there. I'm not happy about it, but I can't drive myself home or take a cab ride myself, and my husband will need the car to pick me up. I'm trying to figure out when I want to call for the cab. I don't want to get there too early because I'm going to be waiting around for a while already, but I don't want to be late either. I've already taken my shower and I'll be getting dressed and making that call soon I guess.

The last time I had an endoscopy, my gastro told me what he was able to see while I was recovering. There is a chance he may have to widen my esophagus or work on something else when he's in there. If he takes biopsies I don't know how long it will take before I get the results. I have no idea when I'll be able to eat or drink after. I guess that will depend on whether or not he does anything when he's in there.

Right now my mouth is really dry because I smoke and I can't drink anything. I'm trying not to smoke too much, but I didn't take my klonopin because of the anesthesia and I'm dealing with anxiety so cutting down on the butts in hard.

Well, I'm off to put on some clothes and call for my ride. I will let you know how things went tomorrow.

Thinking of you kay.
(((((HUGS))))
bizi

Kay,

So excited for you that you have a brand new a/c!!!!!!
I do not believe that I have ever seen one with a remote. That is cool.
The very best thing in the world is having a reliable a/c. Maybe your
electric bills will go down with this machine being more efficient than
the one you had. Enjoy the summer.:D

The clear liquid rule but coffee is o.k. is confusing to me. :confused:
Three years ago, my PCP sent me to a GI for a routine colonoscopy check.
I broke down crying my eyes out in the GI's office because her directions were too ******* complicated.
. . .especially when she combined the food rules with the sleep rules: When you go to bed this. . . .when you wake up the day before you start or stop this.

No way Jose. Not going to happen. My sleep is too messed up to have to figure out all of that. Not possible to figure out what she means by "when you go to bed the night before." What time is that for me??
. . going to deal with that some other time.
=-=-=-=-


'Hoping that you did fine with the procedure.

Sometimes men get it together for no particular reason.
I am hoping that he can start
being easier to live with.

Hugs to you both. :hug::hug::hug:

M

Mari,

The new AC is light years ahead of the new one! The remote for it is ****ing confusing though! I've gone over the user manual several times and still don't understand how to use it. Some of the features are only helpful if you already know what temperature the AC is set at.
There are a few energy saving features on the new AC, and working fan settings, so we should save quite a bit on our electric bill when I get a hang of things though :)

My husband's only going to be 39 next month. Unfortunately, I think he has a couple more fiery decades in him before he slows down. He was a little bitchy when he first picked me up yesterday, but his mood improved when we got home. I hope he relaxes since he has the weekend off from work and family obligations.

They consider black coffee a clear liquid. According to my hospital, so is cola. Most medical practices and hospitals give patients handouts with a complete list of acceptable clear liquids now. There are some you have to avoid because the dyes that are added to them mimic blood. And they should have told you no solid food for 8 hours since some people work different shifts and their sleep patters differ. Doctors should be doing everything they can to make things simpler and easier for patients so they get these tests done.

The endoscopy went fine aside from the fact that they were running behind. I know for a fact that my gastro didn't find any structural reason for my swallowing problems and I will have to have the modified barium swallow. I just don't know which doctor will order it. I don't have an answer as to why I have the reflux problems either, but that may be related to the dysphagia. I didn't get a chance to ask because my doctor was running behind and I only got to read the discharge notes. He took several biopsies and is sending them for microscopic analysis. He's checking for microbes and is testing me for Celiac disease again (he tested me for antibodies last time and the results were negative).

I could tell he took biopsies because I had what felt like a sore throat, and when I ate when I got home I had a little pain. I took my usual nap in the afternoon and was otherwise fine. I slept in until almost 9am this morning, which is amazing :)

I just have to figure out now who is going to order the barium swallow. I guess I'll call my gastro's office some time next week and ask if they will. It makes sense for them to do it since it is their department. They can sent a report to my neurologist.

So no big deal.

oh happy day about your new a/c!!!!!:Dancing-Chilli:
You will figure it out I know you will.
You are a smart lady.
can you program it to run during certain times of the day at different temps?
I wish you the best of luck figuring it out!
((((HUGS))))
bizi

Kay,

It is good to hear that the procedure was performed successfully.
I forget what the docs can learn from the results of the barium swallow

My PCP ran the antibody test for gluten but I was not eating any gluten during the time -- so I think the negative test results are not helpful.
She also ran gene tests which I believe are not 100% reliable for dx-ing but
I have not studied this extensively.

=-=-=-
You are right about your husband's age. :) I forgot about men mellowing.:cool:

Hubby does not seem to have mellowed after 20 years together but maybe he has and
we have adjusted to each other's ways along the way.

My father is much more accommodating and more aware of other
people's needs than he was when he was younger.

(But somehow seems to be getting closer to mania now than he he was
when he was younger.
Right now that manifests as this: at times very focused/ being a lousy listener/ talking fast and with pressure)

M

How do you handle him when he is like this?
does it interfer with work?
does he cycle? depressed?
would he consider meds?
Maybe he doesn't see a problem?
bizi

It's going to take a while before I can get a handle on the AC remote. I'm not even going to try to tackle the sleep feature on the AC at all. I can pick some technical things easily, other things are impossible.

My husband knows he has a problem with alcohol, anxiety, and his temper. I know that he suffers from depression. He doesn't cycle. After I was diagnosed with MS, he had a hard time dealing with things, and I got him to see a pdoc. He tried Prozac for a month, went twice, and quit. He went to one tdoc appointment and refused to go back. I recently made an open-ended offer to make an appointment if he was interested in going back, but he refused and wasn't happy I offered. I try to be supportive, but try not to be too intrusive because that can set him off. When he gets agitated I try to stay out of his way. It's more of a case of me adjusting my behavior to suit his than anything else.

He works very hard and usually burns out at jobs within 4 years, but has been at this one for 5. He is not happy, but neither are all the other experienced guys because of how the company is being run. I think he behaves himself at work and brings his frustrations home with him though. He tends to let things go until he blows up. Sometimes I worry he'll lose it and quit one day. He recently got into a huge fight with a very close friend he also works with. He was more than justified, but he has told his boss he refuses to work with the guy. I don't think it will be a problem, but it is an unfortunate situation. I hope they make up.

My father is is a BPI alcoholic. He turned 69 in May. He has slowed down a lot, but not entirely. His baseline is depression now, he drinks less, and he has a slight bit of some form of dementia now (probably due to his drinking). But he is still capable of very self-destructive periods of mania and experienced one as recently as last year. He has bankrupted himself and his business over the past 2 years or so during manic episodes. I don't know if it's because of the dementia, but when I was living him prior to my suicide attempt he was manic and became physically abusive at one point, and he hadn't been like that since his mid to late 50s.


The barium swallow will basically just identify what my swallowing problems are. I've had one before. They gave me graham crackers with different consistencies of barium to eat and they took X-rays while I tried to swallow them. It has it's limitations though. Unless they have come up with something new, they aren't able to see how well you do with thin liquids because you can't get barium in that consistency, and they can't see how you do with crumbly things like crackers because everything you eat has to be coated in barium, and those are two things people have a lot of trouble with.

Kay,

I am pulling for your husband to find ways to mange his emotional days better.

You exercise a great deal of patience with the medical procedures.

Did you look on YouTube in case someone is explaining your a/c or a/c manual?


M

I haven't tried looking on Youtube for the AC tutorial. I usually do better with reading instructions and trial and error. I just haven't put the work in. I may fool around with it today since my husband isn't home. He gets impatient with me. He hasn't taken the time to get to know the AC yet either. He doesn't DO directions, so I had to explain the basic features of the remote to him, and he is Mr. Electronics.

My husband was in a good mood this weekend. YAY! I was disappointed because he got bombed on Friday and passed out before 7:30pm, but he stayed up past midnight on Saturday, and until 10pm last night. He passed on food shopping with me on Saturday, but he at least he brought in all the bags. I ran errands, and brought him to the liquor store Saturday night, but otherwise we stayed in as usual.

It's becoming clear that he's frustrated by my naps though. Part of it is that they are consistently taking longer now, but I can't help that. I planned on skipping my nap on Saturday, but he ended up telling me to take one because I guess I wasn't making sense. I slept for 3 hours. I get to the point where I just have to lay down, it's hard to wake up, and I never really feel much better after I sleep, but that's what you get with MS. It's frustrating. I haven't noticed any difference since stopping the amantadine. I don't think it was ever helping.

My online coffee order from Keurig arrived. I was able to try the "cappuccino" k-cups. It's not a cappuccino machine, so they're obviously not the real deal, but they were tasty and something different. My husband wasn't a fan though. They come 9 to a box, and I only ordered 1 box. I ordered (4) 24-count boxes of Green Mountain Colombian Fair Trade Select K-cups. I prefer it, but it only comes in a smaller size at our supermarket. It's not economical, so I won't buy it, and buy a 36-count of Nantucket Blend which is also very good instead. I figured I'd take advantage of my promotional coupon this time and stock up. I saved $35 and won't have to buy any coffee for a while :):):)

I intended to go to the club (again) this morning because it's been so long, but it's going to be over 90 degrees today and I really shouldn't be out when it's so hot. So, I'm going to have to put it off (again) until tomorrow when it will be slightly cooler at about 85 degrees. I'm going to have to go tomorrow come rain or shine because I just can't keep putting it off.

HI kay!
it has been hot hot here and humid. My newish uniforms do not breath well, more poly than cotton. It is only june!
I am hoping it is cooler for you so that you are able to get to the center.
I am still so glad that you have a new A/C unit!!!!
bizi

Bizi,

The nice, soft, comfy, all-cotton scrubs have their draw backs, too. In the heat and humidity they are breathable but can stick to you when you sweat too much, but I still wore them daily. It is really hard to find the right blend keeping comfort, durability, and a clean look in mind.
I found out the name of the Keurig cappuccino machine is "Rivo." It is actually reasonably priced, and well rated. Check out Amazon or Ebay, or do what I did and wait for a 20% off coupon from Bed Bath and Beyond (just sign up for their email list) to buy the machine of your choice in one of their stores or online.


I have the AC figured out except the sleep and timer features, which I doubt we will be using anyway. Maybe sometime when I am bored I will play with those buttons, too. I love the energy saver features. The AC will turn off when the room hits the right temp, or you can set it to turn to fan only when that happens.

Last time I went to the butcher shop I bought teriyaki steak tips and the marinade was so bad we couldn't finish them. I was surprised because it's an excellent butcher shop and their maple bourbon and sweet barbecue marinades are very good. I decided to roll the dice again on a house marinated sirloin, threw it under the broiler last night, and it was excellent. I guess if I want teriyaki tips I'll just have to marinate them myself. I mainly buy plain meat and season it myself though.

I got my copy of the South Beach Diet Book. I read the first 2 chapters and skimmed. It's interesting, but there really is not a lot of guidance at all about what you can actually eat. I ended up going online and downloading the official can/can't eat list off their website. It makes the diet very easy to follow. Phase 1 is definitely restrictive, but doable. I'm a veggie lover so that will make things easier. But I hate artificial sweeteners and will have to learn to live with that. I will be starting the day after my birthday, July 12th.

I AM going to the club today. I just have to get motivated to get ready… I will probably get in the shower once I have another cup of coffee in me. There is no set time to go. I just want to get there early enough so I can help do some prep in the kitchen. I haven't decided if I will stay for lunch or not. I will play it by ear.