[CRPSsongbird]

I am in so much pain! The only reason I'm even able to write about this is my voice text on my phone. ...God! ! Please say some prayers for me please! ! I seriously can't handle the pain much longer! !!!!! I'm having the norm burning, shocking aching bs we all deal with on a daily basis, but it heightened to the max and then, which I haven't had this pain in a long time, a severely intense stabbing pain, in my fingertips, wrist, the back of my elbow and other fun random places!!! I seriously need to scream it hurts so much. . I'm really really scared that its migrating to my legs. I was already in a wheelchair for 2 months this summer. The podiatrist thought it could possibly be the CRPS but didn't know for sure. When I got a lot better I thought I dodged a serious bullet. Tonight as I was laying in bed when I noticed both feet felt severely tingling, numb, with a nauseating deep bone BBC ache, and the scariest was the burning on the bottoms, tops, tips/toes, and a sharp shooting burning/electric shock that shot up the left leg from the ankle to mid thigh. This really freaks me out! ! I thought I was getting better. ..A few months ago my doctor downgraded my left arm condition, to Peripheral Neuropathy. This was due to the discolorations, temperature fluctuations, the "flare ups", and general daily pain levels being a lot less troublesome. I haven't had any major pain flare ups since February. I didn't fully agree with his change in my diagnosis., but was grateful for reprieve!
I swear I did absolutely nothing to aggravate my arm.. well I can definitely say that it is NOT peripheral neuropathy! ! I can't even move my wrist or elbow. .. If I do I feel like screaming or passing out from the pain. I have had quite a bit more pain the last few weeks, but I know that will happen from time to time. I swear this time is about the worst it's ever been. .. I find myself holding my breath so I'm not jostling my arm.... and just for fun the red and white mottled discoloration is back. .still very lightly but I think I can safely say that I still have this life stealing monster that we all know as CRPS!!
And of course it chooses Friday night to flare up, because I can't see my doctor until Monday. .... I'm really trying to hold out until tomorrow when the Urgent Care through my doctors office is open, but I'm not sure if I can. .... seriously right now even on oxycodone, methadone, doxepin, and my compound cream can barely touch this pain! ! I was laying in bed, trying to meditate and stay calm, while I was waiting for my night time dose of pain meds. I was hurting way worse tonight, nothing helped. I was laying in bed for 2 hours trying not to cry out and sob too loud, so my fiance could sleep. ... I couldn't contain my tears or cries of pain so I just decided to get up. I don't want to go to the Emergency Room. I get condensing looks because I'm a "chronic pain patient", and it isn't a "life threatening" situation. I hate waiting for hours knowing exactly what they can do to help. 1-4 shots of diluted or something like morphine. It usually only takes 2. Plus I'm actually kinda terrified of IV'S now since it was an ER severely botched IV attempts that caused this in the first place. ...
I was so hoping the doctor was right and my CRPS had gone into remission. ....not likely.....

Please I know this was long, and I know you all go through this all the time llike myself, and any of you who were cursed with this debilitating condition, but I really really need your support and understanding right now! ! Please just talk with my or if that's not possible send all the love and prayers you can my way!!