[dreambeliever128]

I took a break for awhile.

I wanted to say thanks for the emails and calls. I took the break time to get my computer cleaned out and repaired. When I got back on here I was happy to see all of the emails and PMs from all of my friends. Thanks for the good thoughts, all of you.

I am doing ok. I'm on oxygen at night due to breathing problems. I couldn't use the sleep apnea machine due to the VNS wires around my vegal nerve causing me to stop breathing at night. They opted just for oxygen.

I'm still having trouble with my feet and my Dr. wants me to see my hand surgeon for my middle finger to get the nerve released. I'm not ready for that myself right now.

Bill was gone 10 months today and that is still very hard. I know it takes time.

I will try to read up on how everyone is. Mark, I did hear about you and I am so sorry for what you are going through and I will keep you in my prayers. Vicc, I'm ok. Thanks for the good thoughts and I have only good thoughts of you.

Hope the rest of you are hanging in and doing better.

Ada

[tayla4me]

Hello Ada,


I am glad that your night time breathing problems have been solved.
I hope you can surround yourself with people who will provide comfort and support for you at this 10 month anniversary of Bill's passing.
My thoughts are with you.
Tayla

[Desi]

Hi Ada!
Glad that your computer is up and running again! I am so sorry that your Bill passed away 10 months ago today and how hard this must be for you. You will be in my thoughts and prayers Ada! much Love~Desi

[Vicc]

Hi Ada,

I pretty much stopped posting for a while and completely lost track of what was going on in people's lives here, then I came back and after a while noticed you weren't posting.

I think of you a lot, and know from some of your other posts that you were fighting an intractible depression before Bill passed. I know how depression affects every aspect of our lives and damage our health, so when I finally learned you had stopped posting, my concern grew.

I'm so glad to see you posting again...Vic

[allentgamer]

I too was gettin a bit worried about ya

So glad you posted up cause I was about to send the web possie to see if you were ok

I have to go in for the sleep over to get fitted for the sleep machine. Im really not looking forward to it. It is a real drag to have to put on a bunch of gear every night. We shall see what they give me.

Love ya sooo much!
Hugs

[unrouley1]

i wondered what happened to you! i haven't been posting, but i check in to read the posts and haven't seen you...

i'm praying for you!

shalom & love,
angie

[carose]

Glad you are connected to us again!! Computers are wonderful when they do everything we want them to do, otherwise they can be a pain!! I hope you are reliving happy times that you spend together with your huband and the day passes gently. Are you getting restful sleep now? I know that is very important to our overall health. Keep us posted to how you are doing, you are in our thoughts always, just nice to read your posts!!!Carose

[dreambeliever128]

Thanks so much for the support.

Tayla, so far my sleep is better but not where it should be. My Dr. says I really need to be using the sleep apnea machine but the respertory therapist thinks it's not a good ideal. When I stop breathing at night, I have what she describes at the death rattle and it wakes me up so they think it's not safe for me to be on the machine.

The oxygen does seem to help me but the bladder problems still wake me up along with trying to figure out what side to sleep on. The VNS causes me not to be able to sleep on the left side and the RSD and TOS keeps me from sleeping on the right side. I'm still learning how to be a back sleeper.

Vicc, the depression has been a part of me ever since I was a child. Our hopes was that the VNS would help me but at this point it has caused more problems then helped. At times I want to just turn it off, at others I want to have it turned up. I don't give up to easily. It use to be I couldn't say that.
I have come along way with my mental strength.

I am glad you are back and I do know how hard things are for you at this point. Your research keeps you going and I think that is so great. My brain doesn't function to a point that I can do that. I am reading a book right now called, The Power of Now. My Dr. gave it to me to read and I have to reread it so many times to understand what I'm reading. Some of it is over my head anyway. As I told him yesterday, this guy doesn't cover a person in cronic pain and how they can deal with the NOW. At times I want to throw that book across the room. Luckily my Dr. can relate to me because he is dealing with cronic pain now himself, not that I want him to be dealing with it. After sticking by me for 17+ years I don't want anything to happen to him. Losing people you love and care about is the hardest thing a person can go through.

Desi, my computer started running too slow and making a noise. I am hoping we got it fixed. For what it cost me it should be. My kids get me through losing Bill and my 2 Grandson's. I think though we are all trying to help each other and none of us are getting there. I know it takes time and I know I might never get over losing him. That's ok though. After almost 35 years you don't want to forget all of the good nor the bad.

Angie, I emailed you my dear. You are a good friend.

Carose, as I told Tayla, I do see a difference in my sleep and how I'm feeling. I think though what is so frustrating is that I still deal with the CFS. By 4 or 5 PM I am just gone. I can't do anything after that.

I am glad to see most everyone is still here. It makes me know that everyone is still doing their best to keep going through their RSD days.

Ada

[Joselita]

Hey Ada!!

I am so glad to see you back here and posting with us again!!! You have been missed very much!

I hope that things have settled down, and that you don’t have to deal with the kind of stress that you were not long ago. Anything that I can do to help...just give a holler. I am sure that I am not the only one that feels that way.

Like I said, I am so glad that you are back with us. I think that you need to be able to talk to folks that care about you....during this hard time you have going on now. I imagine that the next few months are going to be pretty rough...and you should be able to come here and turn to your friends for support. I mean, that IS what this place is for, isn’t it?

I will have to get you an email off, and get you all caught up on my AZ trip. It was...well.....pretty exciting, and not all in GOOD ways! I will say this, I was glad when that first day was over, as I haven’t had that bad and scary of a day.....well....ever. The rest after that was pretty good, all things considered, and we made pretty decent time even with all of what went on that first day. We even had time to stop at a couple of pretty cool things on the way.....so that was good!

I was happy to get to see the campus where Jay will be living for the next 4 years. Pretty nice school! Have state of the art stuff....and everyone was SOOOO nice!! He is already all tied up in the AFROTC there, and enrolled in his flight stuff....so is already on his way to being the pilot that he has always wanted to be. Like I said, I will fill you in more, later. Right now, I am pretty beat.

I just really wanted to be sure to tell you how GLAD I am that you are back. I worry about you when you go missing......

Lots of Love and
Jose

[sue k]

Ada,
I am glad your back. Hang in there. Everyone is here for you.

Sue K