.. being called and please excuse my language .. A Effing useless twat this morning - and this is a regular occurence, by my husband just makes me reach for the sleeping pills so i can sleep the day away

I want everyone to know that IF I ever do commit suicide, then it it because I have suffered mental abuse by my husband for years.

He had an affair when our youngest was about 14 months old but it didnt count as an affair as he only met her to talk to her, spent his day off with her, held her hand and kissed her .. but didnt have sex ... so it doesnt count as an affair.

I on the other hand did have a physical affair about 11 years ago and my O/H is STILL going on about it and oh, guess who the first person he rang up to tell about it was? The woman he had NOT had an affair with but had obviously kept in touch with for 7 years.
It's ok though, that doesn't count .. they didn't have sex. Though I did wonder why he kept a bottle of mouthwash in the glove compartment of his car at the time.

So Many Things
 

So many things seem so wrong in this world
the difficulty admittedly is placing one foot in front of the other
making the day a good day when feelling NOT
I pray for you, my friend
I have hope however this works out
all things will ultimately be well for you
and if emotional harassment and distress
are mounting and seeming insurmountable
I pray ever more
that resolution will come to pass
not in the deep dark hole you mention
for it is such a final answer to an impermanent
situation
Love, Hugs, Hope, Prayer all for you:hug: :circlelove: :Heart:

Lost writing
 

dearest Saffy

there was so much i wanted to share with you
i lost it all so sorry
do not entertain the abyss
empower your womanly right
screw him and his mouth
i apologize
you can and you will not
take it
please not by popping a pill
for that i'll join you and then
to dingbats trying to deal
with the cards dealt no help
needed to make you feel any
worse than you already do
that is what happened with my
marriage
wasn't having it
and did a brave thing
and let him go and changed
the lock
i was 24 years old 3 babies
3 year old a 1 year old and a 3 1/2
month old did it no regrets
because tried counseling for a
year
he wanted to know if i was
going to be breast feeding
this baby too
i knew then he was jealous
but my babies came first
and lost my respect for him
empower yourself
talk it out
you are worth happiness
just like the rest of us
i praying for it
adding you too it

with loving care
tell me to mind my
business if you must

someone who cares

my wise friend
hits it right on
the head

praying for happiness

Saffy,

There must be enough still left between you and hubby. You have had enjoyable holidays, as well as enjoying each other. Taking something to make you unable to even get up is not good. That's not fair to either of you. The more you take to help you to sleep; the more addicted you will be, as well as useless to be able to do simple chores.

While the pain is something we are all dealing with the best we can; and yes, there are times many of us need to take some meds for the pain to get thru the day. Believe me I know how difficult things can be; but "push myself" I must, otherwise the less I do, the less I will be able to do in the future. Do as much of small chores as possible; as well as enjoying very simple meals and of course, deserts over a cup of coffee/tea. Those are the times hubby and myself have the nicest conversations.

Saffy; I'm praying for you. You are a strong willed woman. Counting on you.

Gerry

Such beautiful input....
 

.....from so many beautiful people who care....:grouphug:

Saffy, I understand so many things that you say and the frustrations of marriage and kids....Looking back, there have been SO many mountains to climb, some seemingly impossible to reach.
Our kids can seem so ungrateful at times. These tough times always have a way of smoothing out though.

Try hard to put in the forefront of your mind all of the good times you've shared and the fact that you have found your way down those mountains....
Getting through these rough patches can be the very thing that keeps you strong, as a person, as a couple, and as a family.

I believe in you and I've seen you rise above so many hard times.
You are loved by many,

Rae
:hug: