No BMW you didn't say anything wrong, I just hadn't seen your post yet.

I'm not having a crisis or anything, I'm just lonely and wanted to share some of my feelings before they went away. Thanks for talkin to me though.
And there was a window open; my roommates left it open when they went to see a movie. I don't have the money to spend on movies, plus I wasn't invited, so I was left behind. I didn't really want to go with them anyway, but still, I was alone.

Hmmm... what music do I like?

Well I like (or at least liked) a lot of different music. I pretty much like anything as long as it shows some talent. I usually like music with lyrics, but sometimes the lyrics make me dislike it. My musical taste is all very random and scatterbrained.

Thank you ((BMW)) and ((Blue)) for talking to me.

I'm still trying to hang on, though I don't know why I should.

Well... I guess I'll get ready for bed now. Goodnight all!

(((( Lonely1 )))))
did you ever think of outdoor noise as music ???
good night sleep well and chat with you soon

Hey thelonely1,

This is very upsetting. There are people out there who will be more than willing to spend time with you. Try to find a group. Believe me there are thousands of people out there who are just as lonely as you. I have just the opposite. People won't leave me alone. They have all kinds of people in crisis groups. Try to find a group online or in the phone book. If you would like I can help. Even though we are miles away we are really just a click away from each other.

How are you doing hun !?

Thinking about you.

Thank you Legalmania for the advice, and Blue just for thinking of me.

I'm hanging in there. Just trying to exist, and trying not to hurt.

Don't hurt sweetie... Never hurt yourself... If you don't take care of yourself, who will !?


When you have that feeling, pray, pray and pray !

love ya !

I hope your seeing thelonely 1 that a lot of people who don't know you care. If you feel bad and hurt, come to us for now. I want you to know that your life can change overnight. Loneliness is temporary but death is forever.

So... today is the birthday party for my one and only friend, but I didn't hear about it until an hour after it started when my roommate got home from work and asked me why I wasn't at the party. Apparently, my roommate is important enough to be told and I'm not. Maybe she thought I'd be told by my roommate, I don't know. The point is, I'm crushed and rejected, and obviously not all that important to her. And the next time I call her she'll have an excuse, and it will probably be legitamate, and she'll tell me she loves me (as a friend obviously, since I'm unlovable in any other way), and she'll say she feels bad, and I'll still feel horribly crushed.

She's probably the nicest person I've ever known, friendly and caring, and I still mean nothing to her. I'm still an afterthought, if I'm lucky enogh to be thought of at all.

I was really trying to do things differently this time, I was really trying not to be the same loser I've always been, but I'm still worthless, unlikable, and unwanted. And yes, I know, everyone will tell me that thats not true, that I have a lot to offer, that I'm important, etc., but I just can't believe that. Why do I have to keep trying? Why do I have to keep "living"? Why can't I just give up? My life is NOT worth the effort, and there is NOTHING in my future, despite what everyone in the world will tell me.

I just want the hurting to stop, but I know it won't until God finally lets me die. I don't want to wake up tomorrow and have to remember that my only friend in this whole horrible f***ing world, spent all of last night drinking and having a good time, and knowing that me and my miserable existance never once crossed her thoughts.

I don't want to have to face the fact that I'm worthless anymore. Please don't tell me that I'm not, because I am; I know it and so does everyone who has ever met me.

I'm so lonely it feels like my chest will collapse, and I hope and pray to God every second that it will.

thelonely1, Listen she is the one who is missing out. Her party was probably boring without you there. It's her loss. Your not a loser, you need to pick your self esteem back up. If she didn't invite you on purpose, let her know it hurt your feelings. Is there something fun you can do in the mean time? Rent a movie or go window shopping, call an old friend? Right now you feel bad because your hurt. Please don't think about death right now. You were put on this planet for a reason, I'm sure that reason was not to kill yourself. I'm begging you please give life a chance. Your probably a very good looking person that's very smart but have somehow lost your way. Stay strong. Whoever that girl is, tell her you have a lot of friends who think she has a very cold heart to hurt somebody so nice.

Don't worry I'm not going to kill myself. I'm just going to keep on suffering, all day every day, for years on end. I just can't force myself to believe that my life is worth anything. I want to lie in bed until I starve to death. I have no desire to do anything else, or at least not anything else that I think is possible. I'd love to have friends that actually wanted me around, but life has taught me over and over that it's never going to happen. I have no interests at all anymore, I don't know if I ever did have some, and the only old friend I could call is already drunk in celebration of her birthday.

Thank you for trying to help though. Sorry I'm such a downer. That's one of the main reasons I don't have anyone to talk to, no one wants to be around a person like that.