Thus and for the risk of liver damage [for which I have been screened multiple times] I was removed from the 1800mg Lyrica a day in early 2007, switched to 3000mg Neurontin.... well, plus everything else. Pain management through chemicals according to my physiatrist. Glad I have a SCS stim unit now, although it seems nothing of the sort could apply in your situation, Tom. I hated meds, tiring, numbing, dumbing, awful meds.... rely on them to all of our need and mutual detriment.

Mark56 PJ

I am really glad that you have PJ Mark...those meds are so often necessary evils.

You people have been making me think too much. Am rereading a fairly new text book..the anniversary edition of Synopsis of Psychiatry by Kaplan and Sadock's and it's amazing how little has changed since Durkheims theory at the end of the 19th century. I moved passed him to Freud's Theory and his belief that that suicide represents aggression turned inward against an introjected, ambivalently cathected love object.
Freud doubted that there would be a suicide without an earlier repressed desire to kill someone else. I never did "get" Freud!

And then I came to Menningers's Theory...(he's my kind of guy)...now I have to find The Trout.

Thank you Tom,
for writing down those lyrics of the song Mark sang.....
.....and Alffe found online.....

Also very much appreciate that you opened up about your spirituality.
I wanted to ask, but didn't feel it my place, so thank you.....
It's wonderful that you are so open about yourself......
"Colourful and Multi-dimensional" are the words I like to describe you as.

I, too, was glad to see Doxie post
She brought up the SCS (spinal cord stimulator), of which Mark has named his "PJ".....(a name which caught on so well, that a little foal was named in honor of Mark's new 'bionic butt' ............long story).....and I have threatened to mail the colt to Mark's neck of the woods .....

I also have the SCS (Lumbar), which is usually considered as one of the last options in pain relief (peripheral neuropathy in both legs in my case).....

In earlier posting on this thread we spoke briefly of the meds we are taking.
You had asked me the 'burning' question (perfect description of the pain) of what I use to control my pain. Actually, my pain is still there. The SCS 'masks' the pain.
Neuropathic pain is certainly one of the harder types of pain to control.....
and one of the most misunderstood.
I am very grateful that we have an entire forum here at NT devoted to the topic of Peripheral Neuropathy.......it is very active and full of very knowledged individuals.

It is possible you may never get an 'actual' diagnosis.......or at best, it may be labeled 'idiopathic'......which isn't the end of the world. Frustrating, absolutely. But the thing to zero in on is Quality Of Life and if pain is a big part of the battle, then I pray that you can receive a more aggressive approach to control your pain.
I truly believe this would help brighten your outlook and future.
I'm 46 - I have to live with the fact that this 'neuropathy' nightmare may NEVER go away.......I certainly won't die FROM it, but I may die still WITH it.
Before I began receiving the appropriate pain meds, I didn't want to continue living the nightmare,....and we all know this song, so I need not play the broken record.....
I took Lyrica for about 8 months and it was NOT a good experience.....
I don't need to play that broken record either (you mentioned you've read posts about it......so you are aware). Others swear by this med, so I won't condemn it.....

The part of your quote that I highlighted were the EXACT words I used.....
It turned into 'crisis' mode when my blood pressure was out the roof and shortness of breath..(amongst several other side effects).....VERY frightening.

Have you gained a lot of weight?
Just wondering.

Anyway, I've done my share of babbling for the day.....

I hope your Dr will address your physical symptoms.....a simple supplemental pain reliever may do you a world of good (Fentanyl Patches did wonders for me in buying me some better quality of life) and you mention 'weakness'.....you need a boost in your stamina.....there's GOT to be something that will give you some improvement.....
How's your thyroid, by the way?
Mine was practically 'caput', which depleated ALLLL my hormones, stamina....and for all I know could have a direct link to the onset of my neuropathy. I take the thyroid med 'Synthroid' to keep me 'throttled up'.....
I had NO idea how vital our thyroid is to our chemical makeup.
Yikes.

Oh yeah, i said i was done babbling
Later Mate~s

for your posts, your thoughtful and studious approach to these difficult moments of life, and yes they are moments, passing perhaps recurring, but passing nevertheless. Trout sounds good, but then receiving a live wire package named PJ in the mail would be both good and overwhelming just now. Still gotta find some pasture land.... a place where one can ponder life questions and have peace. It does exist here in the highlands, just at a pretty price.

Meds, weight gain, feeling awful, all of these things ultimately led us [Cleo and me] to the decision that SCS was an absolute mandated and last play of the game scenario for me, as is indicated in my thread on Boston Scientific. You don't play around with feelings of hopelessness and helplessness brought on by chronic but non-psychiatrically approached pain. For this reason, we did decide to bite the bear on the b u t t and go for the implant. Glad we did, for us, for our family.

Poetry is flooding out of me again after a hiatus pain caused. Glad for the means of expression once more.

Now as to Tom..... tomorrow is another day,
Still praying,
Mark56 PJ

LOL@Mark...this is the Trout I was refering to..http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/thread132506.html

And I'll look forward to reading your poetry now that the juices are flowing again. *grin

Rrae...I am always "up" for a long story...especially about colts.

Hello, Alffe: Thanks for your comment; I'd say YOU are the one who makes us think. And feel...

What little I know of Freud: humans have 2 drives, toward life (Eros) and toward death (Thanatos). In the latter, cells are inclined to return to their original inert state. All I can say is, the Thanatos theory may be true, but nobody has done much of anything with it. It remains undeveloped; its explanatory power, as of today, has not been established.

Freud certainly is exciting to read in places; he stirs something up in the unconscious; you agree or disagree strongly. I get the feeling that he tries too hard to cram EVERYTHING into his theory, instead of just saying his theory can explain many things, but not everything.

Durkheim, as I understand him, held that suicide was due more to group (or sociological) reasons than individual (or psychological) ones. He mentioned egoistic suicide (the loner, not socially integrated enough) and the altruistic suicide (too much integrated; person doesn't see himself as an individual). A soldier who volunarily gives his life for others, is an example. Then there is anomic suicide (caused by social breakdown of traditions, etc.), and finally fatalistic suicide, which Durkheim thought was rare, among overregulated people such as slaves. He passes over them; I suspect they are becoming more and more important.

I think my own case had elements of all 4 types. Psychological elements, too, so Durkheim, like Freud, doesn't explain everything. Anyway, Durkheim's discussion is very stimulating. I thank you, Alffe, for bringing it up.

Bestest, Tom

Hello, Rae: Thanks for your latest cheerful note. All I can say is:

babbling -- never. Bubbling, always.

Yes, I put on 5 pounds or so. Lyrica makes me want to eat late at night -- the worst time because your metabolism slows. The weight increase seems to have stopped. That's the least of my problems.

I had a complete lab workup. As for the thyroid, etc., there was nothing there. NOTHING. I'm still waiting for the antiMAG results. I'm definitely going to mention the Fentanyl patches to my doctor. They sound a bit like you, in fact: promising, promising, promising... At 46 the best part of your life has only just begun.

I don't think I'm ready yet for an SCS, but we will see what the specialist says in December. I no longer usually have pains, but when I get them, they're incredible -- usually lightning bolts.

I'm just tired of feeling tired. In fact, I'd better sign off. I'm about to fall asleep in my beer ... and I don't even have any beer.

Bestest, Tom

Hello, Mark: I took to heart your words, "You don't play around with feelings of hopelessness and helplessness brought on by chronic but non-psychiatrically approached pain." Suicide is not always psychologically (Freud) or socially (Durkhem) caused. What about suicide as a way to get rid of physical, neurological pain? Nobody is saying much about it. And they should -- they'd better. Which is to say, we'd better.

May you be flooded with poetry -- and flood us along with you. As they say in "Jaws": "We're going to need a bigger boat."

Bestest, Tom

http://www.hopkins-arthritis.org/pat...epression.html

Conclusion
Chronic pain is an intrapersonal experience not a specific diagnosis. Patients with chronic pain should receive treatment for underlying medical conditions, and should be evaluated for anxiety and distress. Major depression is a common psychiatric co morbidity of chronic pain, is associated with severe consequences, and is very responsive to treatment. In addition to being a primary treatment for depression, antidepressants are effective in the treatment of many chronic pain syndromes such as neuropathic disorders. The complexity of chronic pain requires an extensive knowledge of the potential actions of many pharmacological agents. The physician should always think about the innovative application of medications regardless of how they are traditionally classified.

Tom

you are quite right in that we are not discussing the pain aspect of your dilemma.

Pain can literally make an individual want to crawl up in a corner and exist no-more.

I ask you candidly if your pain could be controlled and or removed would your thoughts of taking your life, end.

Pain..............is indescribable to another human being, because they are not experiencing the feelings.
Pain can create another person inside ourselves....................i was a wild beast when i had kidney stones..............i was stark staring mad when i slipped a disc in my neck.........and slept in a chair for 5 weeks..............and prior to recieving facet joint injections in my low spine, i attempted suicide.

I can honestly say. i understand the concept of a person taking their life under immense suffering and pain.................And as humans we do just that for animals.....and end their suffering..............

The problem comes when pain relief...encroaches on our capacity to exist in life....in a near as normal function.................most strong pain relief zombifies us.......................

i hope you get ....the pain relief that allows you, to be limited in pain, and alert enough to consider all of your options.

David

Met Karl, and Alffe, the trout did not click. That was years ago as I studied law.... same town in KS.

Anyway, yesterday, I penned this about Change-

Change
MRidder 20100913

‘Tis said we change with every breath,
each cell we do renew.
We whine and cry until our death
self sure of what we do.
How soon do we who walk this path
of neverending change
become aware, the words, our last
are forged anew again?
Can we who take this blessed walk
be casually sincere?
Or must we grapple as a hawk
aware the prey is near?
This prey, this change, can we avoid?
Or are we in its grasp?
Begun as young we soon are old
a lock without a hasp,
for much as we might love to hold
fast tightly to the last,
time’s rigors take us to the fold
of God’s eternal breast.

Change is afoot everywhere we look, even in our advancing grey haircolor or loss thereof [only the hairdresser knows for sure]

Blessings,
Mark56