Originally Posted by SamG11

Hi all,



New here on the "Survivors of suicide forums". Been very active for almost a year on the traumatic brain injury and post concussion syndrome forums.. And I love it there. And will continue to stay active there.



But I'm here for help, advice, and just overall talk to people who are willing to listen. So, here's my story, and why I'm here.


I'm Sam and I'm going to be 15 years old in October. Many tell me I'm extremely mature for my age.

Let's start...

At the beginning of this suffering.


October 17, 2014, I hit my head playing football on my friends lawn. Without knowing, I continued to play and had a concussion. Weeks passed, then months, and I was diagnosed with Post Concussion Sydrome. Been suffering with a nightmare feeling of feeling in a dream like state all the time. Everything feels more unreal than usual.


Been suffering with it for almost a year now. I'm extremely sensitive, and every so often I just break down and cry. I cry so hard it hurts. I hate myself, and I have no friends. I have one friend that's a girl that I talk to, but that's about it. I'm so scared, and loosing hope, and want to just end this because I feel like I will never get better.

My everyday life consists of me either hiding in my room, playing video games all day, and sleeping. My parents and family get extremely angry when they see this, and want me to go outside and hang with my friends. What they don't realize is that I honestly have none. For some reason everyone hates me, and I struggle to find true friends that actually want to hangout with me for me.



Hopefully someone out there cares.
Sam

Originally Posted by Living N Pain

Chronic pain isn't considered as nearly (or properly treated) as seriously as it should be IMHO.
Most everyone that has suffered severely for a very long period of time has had the same thoughts cross their mind, tried and failed, or felt that moment of truth and stopped.
There have been times when I myself have came down to the wire, the two main reasons that the job wasn't completed may sound silly to some.
I have four grown children and six grandchildren, I Pray that they never have to understand life with CP.
Personally them remembering that I chose to end my life over something that they don't understand would break their heart.
A good friend of mine was hit head on by a drunk driver and left quadriplegic, for thirteen years he slowly deteriorated until he passed.
Things can get very tough at times, yet somewhere out there someone is in far worse condition than I am and most likely you are.
For far too many years I have fought severe pain, I may never actually "win", but I will not surrender either.
Hang in there, when you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on tight.
When it seems like the world would be a better place without you..... ask yourself the question, do my family and friends, the people that love me feel the same way ?.
Deep down we all know the answer.
Maybe I am a little different, a smile, hug, or "I love you" makes what life I do have left worth any pain that I could ever suffer.