I know this is not the type of post you've come to expect from me and for that, I sincerely apologize.

I admit I grossly over extended my abilities on all levels to make Joyce's Hawaiian vacation one of a lifetime for her. The entire experience far exceeded her grandest expectations and doing it via Princess Cruises was ideal. She would like to go back someday and spend time visiting a few of the places we didn't have time on this trip, which is understandable.

On Saturday after leaving Maui I went to the ship's doctor for some cough suppressant and had a slight fever. By Sunday morning I had become fully enveloped with a severe upper respiratory infection and once again saw the doctor. His exact words upon seeing me were, "Holy $hit! This is amazing! I just saw you yesterday." My temp was up a full degree higher and all he could offer was a Z-pak of antibiotics.

I was bedridden in the stateroom until we docked on Wednesday morning in LA. Only two or three outings to eat but skipped the last formal night. Skip forward to Friday afternoon and a fit-in appointment to my PCP as things had gotten worse. He immediately sent me to the hospital for a full evaluation and x-rays. Luckily, I talked them out of admission and went home with some strong Rx's.

I felt so weak and bad, I didn't care about anything and actually thought to myself, "This is a good time to die, I've done all I can do. Let be what will be." Here we are at Thursday and another appointment with my PCP this afternoon and my feelings have not changed. I am totally exhausted, weak, using my power wheelchair exclusively in the house. Sleep sequence is still messed up but nothing new after that doctor's appointment yesterday.

I really feel like I've left it all in Hawaii with no reserves to fight back, or on. Maybe this time I really pushed too far even for me? I look for that internal fight on mechanism but nothing is there this time. I'll keep looking as only time will tell.

I will return when I can and thank you all for your support and concern.

Here is a formal night teaser for you guys, enjoy.

Attached Images

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