If you all remember, my hubby wanted us to go to Jamaica to visit long-time family friends that stay there in the winter. He figured it would be fairly inexpensive to fly to Jamaica form Florida, which is where we spend the holidays.

The last time we visited them, I swore I’d never go back because of the heat. It really made me sick. I told Gerry that this year he should go alone and that I’d miss seeing these friends, but that I have to take care of myself. At first he agreed that he would go alone. But after a while he seemed to consider the trip to be optional, and eventually he just decided not to go. I was thrilled.

My hubby is an amazingly active sixty-year-old. He is an avid skier. He kayaks, backpacks the Appalachian Trail, bicycles long distances, and his job is very physically demanding. Both of us used to participate in very physical recreation, but of course I'm not able to do so very much any more. I still worry about our relationship because so many of the things that we used to enjoy are just impossible for me to do. I am really pleased to know that when I say that I need to take care of myself, he understands. Perhaps there is hope for us yet.

I'm happy for you, Marion.

I learned while married that my DH never did half the stuff he talked about doing. Early on in our marriage I would get upset if he announced that he was doing something I didn't want him to do or that I didn't think he should be doing.

I learned quite fast that if I just went along with his "plans" most of the time they never happened. He'd tell me he was going to go fishing with his buddies down in Florida and they'd be gone four days. I wasn't crazy about the idea but just went along with it. When the week came for him to go he decided that our gutters needed cleaning much worse than he needed to go fishing.

Kitty, I hear you. Isn't wisdom wonderful?