Hi there.
Im in a slump.Constant flare.I feel so trapped.I can accept the pain and
disabilities.I feel like I need to move on but I keep landing back to square one.
Its all I can do to run a house hold while hubby is away.The stress of the finances overwhelming.
I contacted rehab to try and retrain.It just brought me down further.I need help with depression before they can help. Councelor thought we could change antidepressant I have been through the list. I need my meds and they cause depression without them I lock up and pain is severe.I am having memory lapses to the point I cant do check book.I do not have enough quarters for SS and hubby makes too much.So no ins no credit and sinking .
WC is responsible for psyc but low impairment.
I try to stay positive but this is kicking my *****.I thought I was stronger than this.

Siccy trust I know how ya feel with having all this pain, funny my wife workes and I have to stay home. There are time I feel so down also, I cannot do things I once could with my kids ( I have 3) I try to do every day things also and POW I flair up, is it the TOS or is it RSD I dont know all I know is that it hurts. Also I get migranes I wake up with them have them all day Siccy we must be strong and fight the Ins. company wants us to fail to give up and go away.
You are strong Siccy hang in there do not give the Ins. the chance to win! fight for your rights.

I know how you feel siccy.
I took it upon myself 9 or 10 months ago to start training on my own for a new career as I hadn't been working some for some time and didn't feel I'd ever be able to return to the repetitive heavy lifting I was doing.
Well I got started studying but have not studied since prior to my rib resection surgery in October.
I tried telling the surgeon that I was still in pain from surgery during a follow up but I felt that the meds were causing me to be depressed.
He told me that depression was normal following something traumatic to the body like surgery.
Ended up sending me out the door with a script for more pain meds. Followed up again and due to pain has changed me from hydrocodone 500 to oxycodone 750 because we need to stop the pain.
He did take me off the diazemepan though.
He and PT decided to try a TENS unit which I got yesterday. Seems what they have me doing with it is causing more pain.
I think my PT is ready to wash her hands with me since she is making no progress.
I've been completely stressed out and depressed with this for 3 months now.
I finally ran away this weekend with my brother to hang out with cousins out of state.
I don't think the long drives helped much.
Things are really getting bad because I need to constantly think about things before I do them or weigh whether something is worth the effort because chances are within hours or the next day I'll be in pain.
It's difficult having to explain to people that I can't do things or not being able to help my parents with things that require lifting or moving heavy stuff.
I too also find I'm getting forgetful.
Hang in there. I know it's easier said than done!

SICCY,
YOU ARE STRONG............ YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO HAVE DAYS WHERE YOU JUST DON'T THINK YOU CAN TAKE ONE MORE THING ON YOUR PLATE.

I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL BECAUSE I AM NOT YOU AND ONLY EACH ONE OF US KNOWS EXACTLY HOW WE FEEL.

COMING ON HERE AND VENTING IS A STRONG THING. IT TAKES STRENGTH TO BE ABLE TO ADMIT THAT ENOUGH IS ENOUGH AND THAT LIFE CAN BE ALMOST TOO MUCH TO BEAR.

I WISH I HAD WORDS OF WISDOM, BUT I DON'T. I JUST WANT YOU TO TRUST YOURSELF THAT THIS DAY OF OVERWHELMING IS NOT WEAKNESS.
A GREAT MANY A PEOPLE COULD NOT DEAL WITH A IOTA OF WHAT YOU ARE COPING WITH.

GIVE YOURSELF CREDIT FOR THAT AND GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO JUST SAY "WHY ME"?

THEY SAY THAT WE ARE NEVER GIVEN MORE THAN WE CAN HANDLE
I WONDER WHO MADE THAT ONE UP...............

THIS SITE IS FULL OF SURVIVORS AND I WOULD BET THAT EVERYONE OF THEM HAS HAD MANY DAYS WHERE THEY JUST WANTED TO GIVE UP.
I AM ONE OF THEM..............

BUT FOR SOME REASON, SOMETHING TRIGGERS MY STUBBORN SIDE AND I JUST WON'T.

MY FRIEND JUST TOLD ME YESTERDAY THAT SHE DOESN'T KNOW ANYONE HOW HAS A BIGGER MESS THAN ME! (SOME OUT OF MY CONTROL AND SOME SELF-INFLICTED).

WELL, QUESS WHAT? I STOPPED MY HYSTERICAL CRYING AND IT TURNED INTO HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER. AS MY FRIEND, I AM THE WORSE MESS SHE HAS SEEN, BUT SHE LOVES ME AND IS THERE FOR ME AND SHE KNEW MY SENSE OF HUMOR WELL ENOUGH THAT IT KNOCKED ME BACK INTO FIGHT MODE.

STILL DON'T KNOW WHY I THOUGHT IT WAS SO PATHICALLY FUNNY, BUT I DID. I THINK IT IS BECAUSE IT COULD BE WORE FOR ME WHEN I STARTED TO THINK ABOUT IT. AND SHE THNKS I'M A MESS, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN WHAT SHE WAS WEARING..........

LIFE IS NOT FAIR AND MOST OF US ON THIS SITE LIVE IT AND NOBODY HANDLES IT GREAT 24/7. WE ARE ONLY HUMAN................

I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT IT IS OKAY TO CRACK UNDER THE PRESSURE AND THAT IT IS NOT WEAKNESS, IT IS LIFE, AS CRAPPY AS IT CAN BE SOMETIMES.

I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT PRAYER, BUT I WILL PRAY THAT YOUR BURDEN LIGHTENS AND THAT YOU ALLOW YOURSELF TO "JUST PLAIN HAVE ENOUGH TODAY."

YOU ARE NOT ALONE, EVEN IF IT FEELS LIKE IT RIGHT NOW.
PEOPLE CARE.

MAY YOU FEEL ALL THE HUGS THAT ARE BEING SENT TO BRING YOU COMFORT.
JUDY

First, I want to Welcome you to the forum. I am glad that you found us...
I am so sorry to hear that you are going thru so much at this time..

One thing is so true.. Life with TOS sure sucks.. It puts us, our family, friends and most of all our lifes on hold or sometimes it just gets placed behind a door and the key is thrown away and lost..

We go to many doctors and because of these crazy W/C laws and or $$$ some people in need can't even get to the surgions they want to go to.. They place you on so many medications that you can look like a walking pharmacy.. Then off to surgery we go in hopes that it will work.. Sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't.

I have been in the awful situation now for over 5 years... I lost my career of 16 years, I would be in financial devistation if it wasn't for my husband who is the biggest supporter I have. I have been through 3 surgerys, 1 TOS and a re due coming up next Thursday.. I had been through sever depression and I finally was able to get out of that ugly cycle with the right medications.. I was always a happy and carefree person before all of this...

Siccy it's tough and you have every right to feel like you do.. Pain, finances, loss of friends, social life and careers is so tough..
Hang in there.. Your in the right place.. I have found so many supportive and caring friends here... These people are my TOS family..
Everyone here understands...

Hang in there.. Your in the right place..
((Hugs))
Dawn

Hi, I also had the surgery in Oct. I was wondering, Do you still have alot of swelling? I just can't seem to beat this, and am in pain everyday. My Surgeon kind of makes me feel like I should be better by now, but my Phys therapist says I am doing good considering what i had done. I also get so depressed because I can tell alot of people think I am not that bad because I look good. I haven't filled the anti dep. med because I don't want to be happy that I can't function like a normal person... Anyway thanks for letting me vent... Caryn

I'm hoping all of you will have some relief of pain soon.

Siccy - vent all you want and need to- it does help to blow off steam about the frustrations.

gbsb- I just posted some electic stim {TENS/IF/Muscle} -info on the RSD forum- too often they do suggest to turn it up too high.

stim thread-
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/sh...ad.php?t=11560

Caryn - It's been posted at times that the anti D's assist the pain meds by working together- so you might want to fill the Rx and see if it works well for you or not.
One time I only filled a half order of my Lipitor - so you may not have to fill the whole thing to do a trial of it. So if it is a no go then you didn't waste the money on it.

Are you all sure you don't have some RSD involved with TOS also?
You can follow that link above and explore the RSD forum if your not sure about symptoms and such.

Thanks jo55,
I just read the thread about the woman whose husband just started using a TENS.
Sounds like I'm having some of the same issues other folks have had with it.
Have been using it on intensity settings between 2 and 5.
Funny thing or not so funny thing. My PT put my TENS together at PT yesterday.
We couldn't get anything out of channel 1 which was on my neck. I had it up to 45 when I decided to see if the cord was completely plugged into the device.
Pushed down on it and nearly jumped out of my skin. One must make sure those plugs are completely in before they ramp it up to a high setting.
Thanks for the info on it.
Thanks for suggesting looking into RSD. I've been here only a short time but I briefly looked at that yesterday and I don't think I have it. In the last 18 months I've had no discoloration or anything that looks different with my arm.
Also briefly looked into Fybro (spelling???) as two or three of my Aunt's on my Mom's side have it.

Hi Caryn,
I don't have anymore swelling from my surgery but the incision on my side and my armpit still hurt. If I'm laying on my good side and my cat walks on my surgery side I can only stand it for a few seconds. The area is still very tender to the touch.
My surgeon also acted like I should be better at our last follow-up. I told him I thought I might be depressed and was concerned it may be the hydro/oxy.
He said depression is normal after an invasive surgery and has prescribed more and more powerful pain meds.
As far as my friends go I know what you mean.
I'll run into them or see them a social gathering and they'll say I don't look bad. Also they'll start asking all kinds of questions.
I'm not sure what they expect. Should we show up in a wheel chair or crawling on the ground with tears in our eyes, complaining about our pain.
Frankly, I don't think they'd want to be around me if that's what I was doing.
The best thing they could do is say nothing because I just try to be happy and put on a happy face when I'm around them as I'm happy to see them.
It'd be nice to be just treated like everything is normal if only for a few hours.

gbsb- many people have posted that it can be useful to wear a sling or other assistive device in public. It can do a few things- 1, it can help you rememebr not to overextend yourself. 2, it offers a visual clue to others that something isn't quite right.

The other thing is some advice that many have offered previously in other threads, and that my therapist offered straight to me which is that how you present yourself is very important. I wish I could say more but my dragon is acting uip and the baby is crying...grrr...
I'll be back.
keep your chin up.