[missmyboy]

On March 22nd my six year old boy fell off a merry go round, hit the back of his head hard against it and then was dragged for roughly 30 seconds by the merry go round. I was a mess but my husband insisted that I was overreacting. We sat him down and after he calmed down he wanted to go on the swings. My husband was pushing him on the swings and then he suddenly fainted (however my back was turned and my husband did not see the front of son, I didn't know he fainted until my nearly 13 year old daughter told me he did when we came back from the ER) when he was about 5-6feet in the air and fell to the ground and hit his head in the same place he hit it on the merry go round (the back of his head). We immediately went home and I took him to the ER after he wasn't "right". His speech was slurred, his eyes looked "glazed", and he could remember anything after riding on the merry go round, he insisted he didn't even go on the swings. He was with a Grade II concussion rather than a Grade III because we THOUGHT he had no loss of consciousness until AFTER seeking medical treatment. THey sent us home with the only directions being no physical activity for two weeks. No referral for a followup, no suggestion to see a ped neuro, nothing.

About 11 days post concussion everything changed. My normally compliant, sweet, and empathetic boy changed into a different child. He became irritable, cried over EVERYTHING, became very oppositional, started saying cruel and hateful things to me, became aggressive, started destroying things, threatened to kill me and his sisters, said he hated all of us, tried to run away on his bike, said he wanted to kill himself rather than to live with us, jumped out of a moving vehicle (fortunately I was reversing out of our drive very slowly when he did so he was unharmed) and ran into the house and locked us out of the house for an hour, he is nasty and foul mouthed, he has a hard time falling asleep and in the morning is near impossible to wake, his teacher said he had trouble with being distracted at school post injury. I took him to a counselor about two weeks after this behavior/personality change and she suggested taking him to his pediatrician for a referral to a ped neuro. After the pediatrician examined him, she said she saw no reason for him to see a ped neuro, she said his eyes showed no evidence of sustained brain damage, everything checked out fine. So, the next step was a psychiatric assessment. We just got done with that, three days worth of testing but we won't get results for a month. I refuse to believe that my very sweet child SUDDENLY turned into this person overnight. I refuse to believe that he suddenly got a psychiatric disorder and all of this is completely unrelated to his head injury. He does finally have an appointment with a TBI clinic at our local Children's Hospital in three weeks. I cannot wait.

I miss my son. It has had a horrible effect on our family. My middle daughter has started acting out as well, attention seeking (she is almost ten). She like to antagonize him and get him going and then play the victim when he hurts her. My son is impossible. It takes four hours to get anywhere because once I do wake him, he refuses to get ready. He takes forever in the tub and will sit there even after I drain the tub, once he does get out he runs around the house naked kicking walls and furniture and screaming at the top of his lungs, he acts feral. My parents used to love his company but he is now no longer allowed over there because he has started being cruel to his cousins and my parents and they cannot handle him, truthfully, I can't handle him either, no one can.

I've been reading up on PCS and quickly losing hope. I feel like I will never get my boy back, that this new boy is here to stay and frankly, I don't like him. That is so difficult to say about my son, my very young son but it's the truth. I love him but I don't know how to handle this new behavior or who this person is. I just want my son back. What can I do to handle his behavior? Does it get better? Is there any hope of getting my son back to his old self? I'm very distraught over this. Our family is falling apart. I am desperate, mainly desperate for hope...

[Jomar]

Just try to remember that it probably is the brain injury and not the real him, he is hurting too, inside his head...
He needs quiet and calm , as best as can be done.

I'm not an expert at all but have read many stories on this forum, so try as hard as you can to get him in to a specialist as soon as you can, ask for any opening that comes up sooner than the appt that is already scheduled.

Also you might look around for a chiropractor that does upper cervical adjusting, his c1/c2 might be misaligned from the falls too.
I've had that procedure and it is very different from the regular adjusting so no need to be worried about that if you are apprehensive on adjustments.
http://www.upcspine.com/self.htm
you can see some videos on youtube of upper cervical adjusting.

Explore the other threads and posts for more ideas, until someone else can post more suggestions for you.

[Mark in Idaho]

missmyboy,

Welcome to NeuroTalk. It breaks my heart to hear of the changes your son has gone through. My mother tells me that after my brain injury at 10, I was not her sweet little boy any more. She did not get any help from the doctors either.

You don't say where you live so researching doctors or clinics is not possible at this time.

In the mean time, you should try to find a brain injury rehabilitation hospital/clinic. They should have a better understanding of the changes your son is going through. I know that I was miserable while recovering as a 10 year old.

A specialist in Physical Medicine and Rehabilitation (physiatrist) may be able to help you or direct you.

As Jo*Mar said, an upper cervical chiropractor (www.nucca.orgmay be able to help a bit. Avoid any chiropractor who wants to do a 'twist the head and pop the neck' adjustment. It is far to aggressive.

It is not uncommon for neuros, even ped neuros to not have a good understanding of a patient like your son. Some are completely clueless.

It sounds like he had a NeuroPsychological Assessment rather than a psychiatric assessment. There is a big difference. A Ph.D. or Psy.D. for a NPA vs an M.D. An NPA can be very informative.

I wonder if his ped can prescribe an anti-convulsant/anti-epileptic to help him settle down enough to not be a danger. I was put on Dilantin (phenytoin) then switched to Phenobarbital. It sounds like his brain is misfiring in horrible ways.

A qEEG may also be helpful if you can find a good qEEG specialist.

The most important thing for you to know is that this is not your son acting out. It is his injury. It may be tough but you need to be strong for him. He is in misery in his head. I think his acting out is a sign of the frustration he is having as he tries to think.

When you look in his eyes, try to understand if he is angry or scared and confused. I could likely tell you that he is scared and confused and does not know what to do about it.

When I was 10 and suffered by mTBI, all of a sudden all of my friends left me. I started to get bullied and harassed. I was clueless as to why everything changed. It is a very lonely time.

If you can, try to sit with him and hold him quietly. He NEEDS peace and quiet. This means so sounds in the house. Limited visual stimulation, too. He should have soft comfortable clothes with no itchy tags or other annoyances. It may help to get him some ultrasoft plush toys for him to hold, even a piece of soft Polar fleece just to fiddle with.

In other words, he needs soothing stimulation with consistency throughout the day.

Keep him away from high-frustose corn syrup and artificial sweeteners. No caffeine so no Coke, Mountain Dew, Pepsi, energy drinks, Barqs Root Beer, Dr Pepper, and any of the others with caffeine. Also, no MSG or processed soy foods.

You can give him some sub-lingual B-12 a few times each day. He needs good folic acid so check this link for foods high in folic acid http://www.globalhealingcenter.com/n...ic-acid-foods/

B-12 and folic acid are neuro-protectants. He also likely needs D3, magnesium and calcium is balanced amounts. But the B-12 and folic acid are the most important.

If he were my child, I would be asking the pediatrician for some bio-identical progesterone cream therapy, too. It is a strong neuro-protectant.

The whole family will benefit from stress based nutrition so the B-12 and folic acid will help you all. Try to tell your 10 yo that her brother is sick but she is not so she needs to settle down and help him.

If you can find a Brain Injury Support Group, attend it and try to learn from other parents. In the US, the BIAA has a referral to support groups. Here is a link: https://secure.biausa.org/OnlineDire...archType1.aspx

Download and print out the TBI Survival Guide at www.tbiguide.com. It is 84 pages of excellent information.

And try to be strong. In time things will get better. Nobody can guarantee how good his recovery will be but he will improve. He needs your whole family to help him.

And keep us informed. There are plenty of supportive people here for you.

My best to you.

[missmyboy]

Thank you both for replying.

It's such a hard thing to do. How I wish I could go back in time and never take him to the park. We were trying to do something nice, have a picnic, fish, and then play on the playground and now I regret it so much. I have a little one who is 17 months old and I don't think I will ever allow her to play on a playground, I've been far too traumatized by this experience. Maybe in time but for now I cringe when I see playgrounds.

He was a near perfect child before his injury. I try to tell myself that it isn't him, that is his injury and I admit I fail at this a lot. It's terribly hard when he is looking at me and telling me he hates me and wants to kill me to keep my cool. It does help to hear from both of you that it isn't him, it's the injury. I think I need to repeat that like a mantra over and over again. I so fear this experience destroying our relationship, which was a great one up to this point and I prided myself on what kind of boy he was.

He hasn't had a neuropsychiatric assessment, just a regular psyche assessment. She wants him to get a neuro one done though. She said since it takes time to get into those clinics, she would perform all the basic psyche evals and then once in the clinic they could finish it up with their specialty eval. I will get the results of the basic psyche eval on July 16 and the Richmond Children's Hospital TBI Clinic squeezed him in with them on July 2nd. Neither date can come soon enough.

What has been really difficult is everyone keeps telling me (short of the counselor) that it's just my parenting making him this way. That I am not firm enough, that he is "pulling one over on me" using his injury as a way to act up and not have to take responsibility for his actions. He is six, I doubt he can logically conclude that he can act up because he suffered a concussion. And while I may not be the biggest, baddest parent out there, I've parented him successfully using my style for almost 7 years (he will be 7 late July) and his sisters for nearly 13 and 10 years. How could my parenting possibly all of a sudden fail and change my son's entire personality. But people keep telling me it's my fault and it depresses me, as if this situation isn't difficult enough to then have to be blamed for it. And when I take their advice and veer from my parenting style and get extra stern and firm it has no effect on his behavior, it just makes things worse.

I am glad to have found this forum, I could use the support and the advice, it might be just the thing I need to keep my head above water because right now I am drowning and so is my son. This forum just may save us. Thank you once again.

[Jomar]

Don't listen to those that aren't walking in your shoes, they are ignorant of the facts regarding PCS /Tbi... and how it can affect a person..
Tell them to go research about how bad it can be , before making judgements...

Poor little guy...

[Mark in Idaho]

missmyboy,

Tell those well meaning friends to watch the "You Look Great" video series on You Tube. The link is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9Xso...ature=youtu.be It is 6 segments. It is about an adult but it tells a story that is worth hearing.

These long waits for a psychiatric eval report don't make sense. Your son is in crisis. I have never heard of a psychiatric eval for a head injury. A psychiatric eval to determine risk of injury to self or others usually would have a quick result.

If your friends are responding from a religious position, please PM me so we can discuss the implications of this attitude. I have seen it for years.

Was the merry-go-round one of the simple rotating metal rides that the kids push by themselves or a carnival style ride?

I know what you mean by your cringe when you see a park with rides. It took me years before I could ride a bike down a hill after my bike fall and injury. Your son's experience was extreme and far from a common risk.

Reasonable care and oversight will protect your younger child. Maybe a bike helmet would be a way to lower your anxiety when she is out playing. There are some cute ones with animal ears and graphics.

And, please disregard the comments. When they have walked a mile in his brain, they will have a different response.

As for the future, there is a chance that he will not be settled down for school next year. Making some plans to accommodate his school needs will give you something to focus on. There are some great home school resources you can research. If he learns that you can be a source of him getting settled and out of the mental chaos, you can rebuild his relationship with you.

There are other resources I can refer you too when the time comes if you need them.

My best to you.

[ginnie]

I just wanted to welcome you to Neuro Talk. You found a good site for help with TBI. There will be alot of response during the coming days. I know alot of people here who have someone in their life that has had this happen, or they experienced and injury to their brain themselves.
You son is not himself, that is for sure. I am no expert at all, I just read the posts as much as I can to learn about it. The injury takes time to heal, and your doctors should have had a follow up for the incident, even if he didn't faint. I hope you are seeing a new physician now, who will see you though the whole problem. Keep in touch with Mark from Idaho, very knowledgeable with this kind of injury. It is not easy when a child is hurt, and you have other family in need of you too. My children are long grown, but I do remember trauma in their lives too. Have faith he will recover with the proper rest and supervision. Take care of yourself too, as you care for your family. ginnie

[aesedai]

I'm so sorry to hear your story!

No, your parenting did not suddenly fail. The people telling you so have no idea what's going on. Offer to let them keep your son for a week if they can do so much better *sigh*

I'm going to have to second Mark on the magnesium. As getting your son to take pills may be difficult at the moment, I would buy a magnesium chloride spray and magnesium sulfate (epsom salts) baths.

Limit dietary and supplemental calcium as the magnesium and calcium go hand in hand.

Magnesium supplementation has been the most helpful thing I've found so far. When I can post links, I'll share the two research articles I've managed to get through. Also, see if you can get your hands on a book called The Magnesium Miracle.

It won't cure him but it should help calm him significantly.

I had significant trouble sleeping and flew into rages starting 2-3 weeks after my injury -- even after years of meditation, coaching people on the benefits of positive thinking etc etc.

I'm still much more emotional and irritable but no more dangerous anger.

Good luck. May your family find fast help and healing.