Traumatic Brain Injury and Post Concussion Syndrome For traumatic brain injury (TBI) and post concussion syndrome (PCS).


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Old 10-06-2013, 06:28 PM #1
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Unhappy I'm already dead

lets face it, this is as good as i'm going to get...i feel terrible, not for me but for my family. i found myself having to lay down more than usual this weekend because of my symptoms. i need to accept what has and is happening to me. i need to figure out a way to move forward because fighting it every day, i will eventually lose.

i'm in hell...im already dead.

ED
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Old 10-06-2013, 07:04 PM #2
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Now, now Strindberg....it may suck-but you are in fact, still alive. I'm saying this even though I'm bemoaning my own limitations...but dammit-I'm still alive and I'm still fighting.

If you aren't familiar-here is the website. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0k8Ey30GLU
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2 years, 2 months, 16 days and change. Hanging in here.

Last edited by tamisue; 10-06-2013 at 07:25 PM. Reason: added info
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Old 10-06-2013, 10:08 PM #3
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ED,

Please post a signature with your current condition so we can remember what you are dealing with. Most of us have lousy memories. I wonder why.

Go to the User CP in the upper left and add your signature and story. I use font size 1 so my story does not take the whole page.

Then we can offer better support without having to ask the same questions over and over.
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"Be still and know that I am God" Psalm 46:10
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Old 10-06-2013, 10:09 PM #4
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Default Don't give in to negative thinking

Hi Ed,

I know there are rough days. I remember them well and wondering why was I alive if I was so useless.

How long are you into recovery? What are your symptoms?

One bad day is not a complete set back. So, buck up, find out about meditation, positive thinking, any relaxing thing you can do (within reason) and hang in there for better days to come.

I do belive we are designed to heal.

Take care,

pm
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[SIZE="1"]What happened. I was in a car accident 2-23-2013, and got a mild concussion from it. I had some time off for brain rest, got somewhat better, but slipped into PCS in March 2013.

Symptoms I had: dizziness, light and sound sensitivity, fatigue, tinitis, occasional headaches and migraines,

Symptoms as of 5--2013: poor sleep, tinitis, some confusion /short term memory blanks, balance. The other symptoms are mostly gone, but flare up if I OVERdo something.

Therapy I had: vestibular

3 months in: I could drive more and for longer distances. I felt like a younger, happier version of myself and I feel so blessed to have this feeling.

9 months in and I am working full time. I do get tired, and some sound and light sensitivity from time to time, but mostly I am over most of my symptoms.
I pray every day and I m praying for your recovery.

Over a year in: I can multi task (limited) and have humor in my life. But when I am tired, I am very tired.
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Old 10-07-2013, 12:18 AM #5
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Hang in there ED! You will feel better. For sure. Get through each minute, each hour, each day. Focus on very small joys. Eat a piece of chocolate. It is hell for sure. I am two years post accident and am Better than i was...i seen a difference from six months ago. More stamina...being able to cope in the outside world. Hang in there!!!!!!!
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What happened: Legs pulled forward by a parent's hockey stick while resting at the side of the rink at a family skate....sent me straight back. I hit the back of my head (with helmet) on the ice, bounced a few times, unconscious for a few minutes. September 11, 2011. Off work since then…I work part-time at home when I can. It has been hell but slowly feeling better (when I am alone☺).

Current symptoms: Vision problems (but 20/20 in each eye alone!) – convergence insufficiency – horizontal and vertical (heterophoria), problems with tracking and saccades, peripheral vision problems, eyes see different colour tints; tinnitus 24/7 both ears; hyperacusis (noise filter gone!), labyrinthian (inner ear) concussion, vestibular dysfunction (dizzy, bedspins, need to look down when walking); partial loss of sense of smell; electric shocks through head when doing too much; headaches; emotional lability; memory blanks; difficulty concentrating. I still can’t go into busy, noisy places. Fatigue. Executive functioning was affected – multi-tasking, planning, motivation. Slight aphasia. Shooting pain up neck and limited mobility at neck. Otherwise lucky!

Current treatments: Vestibular therapy, Vision therapy, amantadine (100 mg a day), acupuncture and physiotherapy for neck, slow return to exercise, magnesium, resveratrol, omega 3 fish oils, vitamins D, B and multi. Optimism and perserverance.
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Old 10-07-2013, 09:18 AM #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ED View Post
lets face it, this is as good as i'm going to get...i feel terrible, not for me but for my family. i found myself having to lay down more than usual this weekend because of my symptoms. i need to accept what has and is happening to me. i need to figure out a way to move forward because fighting it every day, i will eventually lose.

i'm in hell...im already dead.

ED
here's my story...
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Old 10-07-2013, 10:04 AM #7
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Ed, it sounds like you were very active prior to your injury, and that was a big part of your life and your identity. TBI/Concussion can really do a number on our sense of self. It often does feel as though "you" are dead -- but there is a lot more to "you" than the things you are used to doing.

Get some rest, hang in there, and do what you can. The worst part is not knowing for sure how long it will all last, and how well/soon you'll recover. With a broken leg, sitting out isn't as big a hit to your self-image, because you can see it, and you can also gauge the degree to which you're healing. So, you can (usually) see an end in sight.

With TBI, that kind of clarity just isn't there.

What else is there in your life that gives you enjoyment and makes you feel like "you" again? Surely, there is something. Find that -- or ask around to see if others have ideas.

Focus on the things you have and the things you can do, to keep your sense of self intact. Take good care of yourself, rest up, and keep going.

Recovery is different for everyone. I have had tons of lows and highs over the past years. But by keeping steady and taking care, a whole lot has come back to me.
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Old 10-07-2013, 01:46 PM #8
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ED,

Try not to fret and worry about your symptoms, they will go, it can just take a very long time. PCS symptoms are a desperate state of affairs, but they happen for a reason.

Fatigue is there because your brain and body need rest, lie down and if you can get a couple of hours sleep during the day.

Headaches, light and noise sensitivity are all closely linked. I am not a doctor, but I personally believe in my case all this was related to changes in cerebral blood flow and widened blood vessels. When I took medication which narrowed blood vessels, the symptoms reduced.

At this time, you have to be selfish! Avoid TV, radio, computing, video games, conversation - isolate yourself and get silent quiet rest. It will pay off in the end!
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PCS following head injury November 2012. Experienced dizzyness, light and noise sensitivity, hypercusis, fatigue, insomnia, migraines, facial pain, problems concentrating, irritability, sensory overload, exercise intolerance.

Symptoms mostly resolved, working full time and I am now mostly better. I wake 6am daily since my injury. Was experiencing daily Neuralgia which was controlled with Cymbalta 30mg, Lyrica 200mg daily. Now only on 30mg Cymbalta.
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Old 10-07-2013, 05:32 PM #9
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Default Hang in there

I know it's tough. I'm one year post accident and still on the slow recovery road. About six months ago I was at my worst. What helped me the most was to let go of my past life and try to be hopeful and grateful. I needed to learn to be a new person. We can't go back and change this situation. And pushing through the pain and symptoms just makes them worse. Keep on trying to manage your symptoms. Let your ego go. Find new hobbies that are possible. Try to slow down your life and allow for as much healing as possible.
Good luck
Su
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Slipped in puddle and fell. 10/6/12. Whiplash and concussion. 48 years old.
Dizzy, balance, vision, taste, sound, light, cognitive, headaches, foggy, head pressure , irritability,....
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Old 10-07-2013, 05:49 PM #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ED View Post
lets face it, this is as good as i'm going to get...i feel terrible, not for me but for my family. i found myself having to lay down more than usual this weekend because of my symptoms. i need to accept what has and is happening to me. i need to figure out a way to move forward because fighting it every day, i will eventually lose.

i'm in hell...im already dead.

ED
all of u are angels, thank u for responding and the words of encouragement...i pray god heals us all from this dreaded condition of ours.

ur friend and brother,

ed
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