Way to go Danny!

Bud

What a horrible day. How do I experience any joy?

I'm having a very difficult time staying away from my phone. I will never get better at this rate. The memories are too painful to just sit there and rest, but that's what I need.

This really is a life or death situation. I'm holding on by a Thread.

I do have my girlfriend living with me in a fairly quiet house but she works long hours to support me. She's gone all day today.

I'm so sad, depressed, lonely and confused. Why have I been dealt with so many tough predicaments in a row? I want my life back.

Just keep holding on... that's all there is to do right now. Things will improve.

It sounds silly, but the thing that got me through the days, weeks, months after my mom died (besides my dogs and goats!) was coloring. It's almost as restful as just sitting, but without the stewing about my predicament or without having to remember the painful memories too much. It just required enough concentration to distract me, but not tax my brain.

I still color every day and find it relaxing. You can just google "adult coloring" and print off some designs to color or what I ended up doing is buying a couple coloring books from amazon.

When I'm coloring, I try to think of it as a form of therapy. My technique has improved since I started and I can now (sometimes) do slightly more complicated designs. (I have various visual issues, so all the lines made my eyes crazy and tired in the beginning.)

You're not alone, we're here and many of us have been through similar situations. Happy Birthday, Danny. I know it doesn't feel happy this year and that's ok. Maybe at some point in the coming weeks / months, you'll feel more like having a little belated celebration.

Just keep holding on.
Starr

Hi Danny,
I am so sorry about the loss of your brother. I cannot imagine how difficult it must be to be grappling with a TBI and then, suddenly lose your brother.
Grief takes a toll on our bodies, for sure, and after attending the services, you must be exhausted. How lovely that you were able to summon the energy and emotional strength to speak at the service.

All I can suggest is do what you need for YOU to feel better and cope, no matter what that is. Processing grief takes time.....I know you feel tested Danny....it will get better. Take it a day at a time.

All I can tell you is, when I feel at my poorest, health wise(not necessarily TBI),
I have a doctor I go to for Vit C IV's and various other treatments like glutathione IV, B12 injections, magnesium/calcium IV...my doc tailors it to my symptoms and blood test results. Generally after a month or so of IV's etc a couple times a week I feel stronger physically. I also make sure I seek a therapists help when I get down, or at minimum, talk with trusted friends.

I hope you have people you feel close to you can turn to now. We are always here. I know you don't know me but, feel free to PM anytime.

Also, Debi ( St George 2013 ), just lost her husband suddenly and she is posting every day, telling us how she is doing....(in the Coping with Grief & Loss Forum). Maybe, if that works for you, give that a try.

With my condolences...you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Diandra