Hi Shez, I am sending you a hug.

I know how you feel. My son is a survivor of TBI. I wish he would be the one writing here but he seems totally unaware of his condition despite similar symptoms as yours and many others. I always feel guilty too knowing so many have far worse situations. Yet that shouldn't be a judgment minimizing our own experiences. Having to deal with it all the time is stressful; and the unknown future makes it worse. I don't know what to say to anyone else to make them feel better. I wish I did. Does it just help to know someone is listening?

Hi Lynn,

It helps me in the moment of receiving support. Everytime I lay it out there I feel very vulnerable. As a result, I tend to completely avoid seeking support when I feel very low. I may even come in, and read supportive posts of understanding, but I avoid writing another difficult time (and risk losing support). That's my rationale anyway.

Thank you for your kind words. I hope that things go well for your son and that his condition improves as time passes. Don't feel guilty ~ I often feel guilty for the changes I've undergone (as it has impacted pretty much every area of my life). So much suffering. I can only imagine what you feel, Lynn. Hugs to you

Shez

Shez, I think I can relate & read betweet the lines here? I've been there too. I think it's called shame. I have been, still trying to deal with some of the Horrible things I have done that simply hurt the ones I love the most! Just because of my selfishness. Sometimes I think I am a terrible person. Maybe I am, but others tell me the opposite? I even argue with them.lol.. Guilt is a horrible stress agent. Get rid of it..Dump it..it's done. Start every day anew..

At the risk of sounding like a preacher...I have tried EVERYTHING...so I gave in and tried GOD. I did not turn into one of those cookoo people but have really found the peace I was needing. I don't know your spritual connection, but I was at the point of (Give up OR give in)..My friend called it (Sink or Swim) my choice...I'm really not afraid to say what I think & never judge anyone...My belief's are my own & I am sure I have twisted them to fit my lifestyle..lol...

You will be ok shez...No one will leave you from here...If you ever want to chat, you can PM. I only have mornings to myself, sometimes late evening because I care for my mom, Alzheimer/Schizophrenia/Dementia So I am typically slow with responce. Have a Lovely day!

I'm sorry to hear about you're injury! I am 4 months into mine and it's really getting to me as well to be honest. I feel like i've had a hint of depression in my symptoms as well. Just feeling useless really, but i tell myself that it is natural to feel this way, but the thoughts of being useless and so on is quite unrealistic. Therefore NATURAL and UNREALISTIC are the two main words that helps me. If you feel some feelings of depression coming along, take about 5 deep breathes and think of something positive such as you're family or a hobby or whatever. That's what i do and to be honest it works 90% of the time! It's only a suggestion but give it ago. you might be surprised

I can relate to the parenting side of things. I have two boys - 2 & 4 yrs old. It has been just as traumatic for them. One minute I was happy mummy. Next I was sick and sad mummy. Dont want to leave the house, but I have to for them. They really pick up on whats happening. At playgroup today I had to go outside to hide my tears. Its just not fair!!

Hi nikkicoop,

Parenting has been very difficult since my brain surgery 3/06, and worsened after the tbi 3/07. My girls were aged 2 and 4 when my life became a shambles. I presume that this emotional battle within myself contributes quite a bit to my depression.

I become overwhelmed rather easily nowadays. Kids just being kids and having fun stresses me out big time! While I understand their rambunctious behavior, my reaction seems instant to me. I try hard to maintain control over my reactions - it is far from easy though! My girls quickly pick up on my stress, and then they become stressed out, and a vicious cycle is born. I have dropped certain activities & picked up others, and have had to limit my days available for work, to reduce general stress level as much as possible.

In the past month or so, I've seen a lot of improvement in my relationships with my daughters. For that, I am eternally grateful! My girls seem to have acquired a better understanding of what I can & cannot handle, and (now anyway) work around my limitations. *knock on wood* It is sad that I can't do ____ like Daddy and most other parents they see. And as soon as that thought pops into my mind, I have a heck of a time bringing myself back up again!

I can understand how you're feeling guilty and sad for your boys. Try very hard not to let those thoughts enter your mind though. In my experience, those thoughts begin one heck of a horribly emotional roller coaster ride!

Best wishes to you ~ take care!
Shez

Im with you guys on this I have 3 little girls and when my PCS symptoms started we quit going anywhere and all and they hated it and did not understand and yeah i get easily overwhelmed also

tommywrestler!

It is so hard, and damn depressing at times. My only advice is to avoid things that overload you (as much as possible), in order to avoid the overwhelming fear, anger, anxiety, etc.

Best wishes to you!
Shez

Good call man I have been trying to recently and it does help,i was one of those people who never really thought stress affected anything until this and now i know how bad and what stress can do to ya