I wanted to say hello to everyone.
Some, I've met on the RSD side. I also have TOS, some discs, like that.

Two accidents, one in 83 caused the rsd/tos, then in 98k caused the tbi/discs.
So, it's over a decade that I have this TBI, and it seems like pcs, or something.

I take a variety of meds, the pain crosses over into the tbi, and doesn't help.
Stress. I can handle a lot, but now, I'm coming to a divorce that's been coming longer than I've had the tbi. I feel I have PTSD,, too, because my second wife, has taken everything my family (Parents and I) have ever built (two business') my bank accounts, threw my children (whom I raised and I OUT) of my house, her name is not on it.
I have so many property losses, and was well insured for the accident.
My lawyers ALL screwed up, probably because of my lack of ability to communicate with them.


So, now wife realizes there is NO pot of gold, and pushes the divorce foward, she has been taking $1100/mos. from my disability for many years.

I'm just so dam wound up, and it keeps rolling in my mind,, that my kids won't talk to me, because they warned me, but I just didn't know what to do, I was close to comatose for those first few years. She's really got me cornered. My last attorney wouldn't answer my calls for 5 years, and if he did, he just "yessed" me. He won't give me my file, which has my Pre Nup in it.
I'm usually so good at giving things up to God.
But now, I"m a shaking mess. I can't sleep without nightmares, I can't wake with out crying.
I've never been such a mess!
I know
that so many have it worse. But I sometimes feel as though my heart will stop.

I had quite a subdural hematoma, and they wouldn't operate to drain it because it so deep, at the brain stem.

I'm sorry, I'm rambling now.

Anyone have a formula for getting back the faith, fighting the worry, stop the shaking?
Maybe I should reach out to this new lawyer, and see if I can email her some info about my illnesses?
I just can't imagine being ready for an appointment tomorrow afternoon, I don't even remember what she told me to bring!?

Ideas?

Pete
asb

Pete!

Petepetepete!

One big warm, tight, hug, handshake and howdy, moose sized welcome to the site. This place is amazing!

Man, I'm sorry you're getting run through the grinder.

OK. Multi-tasking is over rated. I use a retreat, regroup, and reload plan when it all piles up on me and threatens to collapse. This method probably won't help in time for tomorrow, but if you can just focus on one (and only one) problem and get it resolved I think it will build momentum for you. This works for me and took a long time to find and accept what worked for me.

More of our team will post advice that can help you. Just keep in mind;

You are not alone.
You are one of us.
And we are here to help.

I am the MonSter that MS fears.

Oh Pete, I am soooo sorry for all this pain & emotional distress! First thing I would do,,,Copy this very post you wrote & email it to your lawyer! Let her SEE this! It might give her great insight!
As far as that "wife"...YES, Thank GOD right now for getting you out of her life!!! You may have lost so very much, but don't let her take ANYMORE of YOU!

Don't lose your Faith...please...keep reaching, ....I think by posting you just took a huge step! Good luck to you & keep us posted..I will Pray for you my friend

Thank You,
Moose, and Gardengrl,
For your kind and thoughtful replies!

I'm winding down a bit, I know that there is only so much I can do.
There's NOBODY who can do what the court is demanding, let alone someone as disabled as myself.
My brain just "spins out" when it gets flooded, or flustered, and my wife knows this.
One of her old sayings was "I can control you with your pain / brain".
She's a sweetheart.

The kindness, and thoughts and ideas are priceless!
I hope for more!

Love to all,
Pete
asb

hi sorry your having this on top of all, I feel an advocate is needed people can try to take advantage of us, power of attorney should only be singed over if there is no other option, if there has been wrong doing or advantage taking, you may have legal protection see if the folks at the below link can help you, trust in god but tie up your camel , I get easily overwhelmed buy paper work to many bits of information an I end up shuffling them into a total mess until I cant make out anything, so can understand you need help you can trust

http://www.biausa.org/stateoffices.htm

AintSoBad,

You sure have a load to carry. Sorry to hear about the way others have treated you. Welcome to the club.

Regarding your past attorney with your files, have you complained to the State Bar? Most states have laws against retaining a clients files. They cannot even keep them when fees are unpaid.

You might want to check with an elder attorney. They may have expertise with clients who have been taken advantage of.

Research your State Bar Code of Professional Conduct.
In PA the Supreme Court regulates attorneys.

Here is a link about "retaining files." http://www.padisciplinaryboard.org/f...#RetainingFile

You may have a "public accommodations" claim for being discriminated against due to your disability.

Have you found anybody who can help with your TOS? I have chronic TOS since an injury in 2001. I found a PT who is expert at working with TOS. She uses myofacial release and other modalities. She could tell I had TOS before she touched me, just by observing my posture. Hope you can find someone who has similar skills.

Regarding your nightmares, have you been check for sleep apnea? I have central sleep apnea caused by my TOS. If I lay in the wrong position, my breathing stops and I have nightmares. I sleep best in a recliner with a pillow supporting my head so it does not roll to the side.

At first, I was afraid to go to sleep because sleeping was so traumatic. Now, I just have to be very disciplined about my sleeping posture. I have body jerks in my sleep so I take Neurontin to reduce the jerks. Otherwise, the jerks will cause me to change position and I end up having nightmares.

Brother do I understand your dilemma. That evasive good night sleep is rare and exhausting when it does not happen. I would rather not sleep than sleep bad.

I use TV to occupy my mind when I cannot sleep. My brain injury makes it impossible for me to read for pleasure so TV is all that is left. If it wasn't for the cable/satellite channels, I would be in deep trouble. I have even learned that some infomercials can be good for insomnia.

Hope I have been helpful.

Time for me to get ready to go to brain injury support group. It is the only place where anybody understands what my wife is going through. Have your kids ever been to a brain injury support group meeting? They would benefit greatly.

Vini and Mark,
So many thanks to you.
I got a ride to see my attorney tomorrow, the court may not allow any further (MY) evidence!
But we'll see.

If anyone else wants to add, I think I'll print this thread out and take it with me tomorrow.
"NOBODY GETS IT"

just like the dam RSD.
Oh, ya hurt? Oh, ya can't think?
Ah, that's just gettin' old creepin' up on you!
Yea. Sure!

Thanks again!

Pete
ASB

[QUOTE=Mark in Idaho;
I use TV to occupy my mind when I cannot sleep. My brain injury makes it impossible for me to read for pleasure so TV is all that is left. If it wasn't for the cable/satellite channels, I would be in deep trouble. I have even learned that some infomercials can be good for insomnia.

.[/QUOTE]

Ok, I know this is off topic..sorta....I know what you mean about reading with a brain injury....it's just so frustrating! I recieved an email a few days ago,,\it has be confused to no end!

I will paste it here for you, & I am hoping you will tell me if you could read it, & if so, how easy or hard was it for you?

This is weird, but interesting!



fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too
Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

My brother sent me that note a few weeks ago, believe it or not, I read right through it.


But back to topic.
Getting ready to go see my attorney this morning, I sort of felt that I wasn't ready, and as I mentioned, I had to bum a ride. (I can't afford to drive, paying my wife so much from my disability each month, but, she's got a new car).
I started to spin. That went into a full blown panic attack (which I haven't gotten for quite some time), and I hadto call and put it off until Monday. I called my friend who was driving me, and he was ******!

Dam.

It's like my brain just freaked out and it drove my RSD pain and back and forth.

So, I hope I get some good work in on this over the weekend, and put something worth together.

Anyone ever get these sort of adventures? When you're stressed, or otherwise?
My wife is going to greatly profit, and I will greatly lose because of my disability, but you know the old drill:
But you Look Fine!


Thanks People!

Pete
asb

I had no problem reading the two quotes.

My scrambled brain types like that most of the time. I am constantly making corrections to get rid of the red squiggly lines.

I actually do better reading the scrambled words that normal words. When reading the scrambled words, my mind includes the context to read the word. When the words are spelled right, I read them separate of the context and often misread them.

Go figure.

Of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.