Thanks dave.
today is day 61 alcohol free.
December 2nd is my 100 days. looking forward tothat!
bizi

I had the worst night sleep....
rats
I slept so well friday night....
sigh
Restless legs big time, multiple interruptions, the cat crying almost non stop...could have shot her. The trazadone causes my mouth to be dry, it has gotten worse since my friend told me about her reactions to it. Now I am noticing it. Nose was hard to breath out of so I tried mouth breathing...that dried my mouth out even more. Got up and Cleaned the water bottle because it smelled...then later Hubbys cell phone chirrped because the battery was dieing and he forgot to shut it off. I got up to take it out of the room, he got up too and just shut it off.
sigh
Then I got confused at 6 am and thought it was sunday night so I had forgotten to set the alarm for 8 so I did that. When the alarm went off I turned it off and went back to sleep. Then got up at 8;30 and hubby was still here. he usually leaves for work at 7;15 or so. I asked him what time he had to be at school....
He said you poor thing... it is sunday.
lol
I stayed up and read the paper. Our local elections did not go our way unfortunately.... for governor David Vitter vs. John bel Edwards in the run off nov 21.
We are under a flash flood warning with rains from patricia....
We went to lunch at 11. Had the roasted turkey and rice dressing and green beans and baked sweet potato with pecans.
Delicious!
Home by noon.
I actually cleaned the microwave oven completely. And cleaned out the pet fountain which I have neglected my turn. Jeff has been doing that lately which is not fair. It is a once a month chore.
So it was long over due my turn. That took an hour.
Now I have some paperwork to do. Billing should not take me that long. I have gift certificates left over from christmas for khols. I am going to look for a new pair of long pants, maybe jeans and some other clothes, and a new purse if they have any that I like.
They have lots of clearance racks to go thru, a perfect rainy weather activity.
I decided to go to the gym later and walk on the tred mill.
My neck is better. I have been doing the stretches 3-5 times a day like instructed.
Did I mention that I pulled my back/scapula muscle about 3 weeks ago? The chiropractor worked on that area. I think that I have multiple issues going on. It is going to take a while.
Well I had better get to my paperwork.
Have a great day!
Thank you for reading!
bizi

I hope it is ok to post that I am at day 64 days alcohol free today......
if You look at my histories monthly journals then you know how much I drink when I was drinking...some times 12 drinks a night. mostly 4-6.
So when I decide to drink I binge drink and can't seem to moderate. It is definately easier to just decide to not drink for a period of time....FOR ME>
I can't seem to do moderation at this point in my life.
I am bipolar and I should not drink because of the meds that I take.
I lose weight when I don't drink....
138 this morning the lowest that i have been in years!
I am on the verge of hypomania and need to be very careful that I don't fall off the edge.
here is to staying sane....
bizi

Hi bizi,

Of course it is ok for you to Post about your AF Day Count, we support each other in all our endeavours. 138 is great as a result of it and your very varied diet.

A little concerned that you are on the verge of becoming hypo, I hope your meds even things out and it passes quickly. I am having problems with my Depressive Disorder, spiralling downwards further than I can cope with.

Dave.

I am sorry dave for your spiralling depression.
Does it help to talk it out? do you have a therapist to help, supportive friend?
((((((HUGS)))))
bizi

Hi bizi,

My last 2 Therapists did a number on me, betrayed my trust and destroyed my faith in the profession. I found it difficult enough to open up and share with anyone before this, I am more isolated and introverted now. My family do not understand, they see my Mood worsen but can only relate it to my physical pain and how they sometimes feel sad. It is pointless trying to explain a life-long mental disorder to them.

I will have to bite the bullet and ask my GP to increase my Mirtazapine, along with all the side effects.

Thank you for caring and for the hugs.

Dave.

Bizi and Dave - I think you two are amazing. You each have your challenges to deal with but you manage to stay on track and work effectively towards your goals.

Give yourselves a pat on the back from me.

Carol

Hi Bizi, Congrats on the AF days and the weight loss.
I am relieved you have the insight to catch any hypomania traits.
Knowing this helps to keep life manageable.
Please take excellent care. You mean so much to many people.

Warmly,
DejaVu

Hi Dave,

I am so sorry you have to deal with this.
You are a very strong person. You cope with so many major challenges.
You also manage to share so much of yourself here, supporting so many members.

You also have my admiration and my support.


DejaVu

Thank you for your kind words dave and dejavu.
Your continued support and encouragement is what I need....
I think that I was was having some hypomania symptoms due to the trazadone. (it is in the antidepressant family) and I can't take antidepressants they make me manic.
She discontinued that and let me go back to taking klonipin .5mg to sleep at night.
I have been sleeping better since the change.
Am hoping that I hold steady. I am following my doctors orders. She is happy with my progress and wants to see me in 3 months.
I did break my fast tonight. 65 days...I am done counting!

I drank 3 beers and had a big dinner. which was delicious by the way.
I am stuffed and overly full.
The halloween attractions were great!
Thank you for your support thru out this process called life.
bizi